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  1. #81
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    Quote Originally Posted by trishalishous View Post
    Im one of those women. due to a medical condition chances are I will never exclusively bf a child. we introduced formula when dd lost 15% of her body weight, via ng tube. we tried many times to ebf (i took motilium, fenugreek, oats and yeast, pumped 2 hourly and fed at least 2 hourly from both sides -I spent 19hrs feeding or pumping one day!) but she kepy losing weight each 48hrs (we went to twice weekly weighins at 6 months, weekly at 8 months and monthly from12-18 months)
    I did manage to keep feeding (2years now) and hope to feed bellyfruit. but im also realistic about my chances, and have donor milk on standby.
    so for me, trying a bit longer would never have helped. Im blessed with exceptional circumstances which allow my incredibly supportive dh to equally share child minding, so I can focus on feeding. not everyone has that. im also bl00dy stubborn, and bf was important to me, so I was able to continue.
    but then for some they might not have the support, may not rank bf as highly as I do, or simply may not want to feed, and theres nothing wrong with that at all
    Wow, Trishalishous. I'd say it sounds like you did a great job, and have an awesome perspective to boot.

    I'd add to that and say that they may not have got there. After my milk initially came in, it disappeared again. I tried all the things I listed, but to no avail. I couldn't even get anything from pumping. When I switched to formula there was nothing to dry up, as there was no milk coming out.

    I didn't give up due to low willpower. My willpower was focused around DD thriving - which she wasn't doing off my non existent milk. I think I had great support, but it just didn't work out for me.

    At the time I felt terrible, but having seen DD grow into an intelligent, healthy, toddler I now only feel sad that I let people make me feel like a failure. I know that I wasn't, but new mums are so vulnerable.

    Support takes all forms - and sometimes women need to know that it's OK if things don't go as planned.

    Sent from my GT-P7510 using BubHub

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  3. #82
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wise Enough View Post
    The WORLD health organisations guidelines are set to include third world countries without sanitation, in which case breast would definitely be the better option.

    But can anyone HONESTLY say that they can tell the difference between a formula baby and a breast fed baby? And later in life? Do you smugly say at work you aren't catching the cold that's going around because your mum breast fed you till you were 2? Do you think the top of the class kid is smart because they had breast milk? The top scorer in my school was formula fed. I was too and I'm a scientist now. I don't believe I've been harmed.

    Kudos to everyone who breast feeding is working for. But it won't make your kid better than mine. She's going to save the world one day, don't ya know?
    Well said

  4. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by Girl X View Post
    Wow, Trishalishous. I'd say it sounds like you did a great job, and have an awesome perspective to boot.

    I'd add to that and say that they may not have got there. After my milk initially came in, it disappeared again. I tried all the things I listed, but to no avail. I couldn't even get anything from pumping. When I switched to formula there was nothing to dry up, as there was no milk coming out.

    I didn't give up due to low willpower. My willpower was focused around DD thriving - which she wasn't doing off my non existent milk. I think I had great support, but it just didn't work out for me.

    At the time I felt terrible, but having seen DD grow into an intelligent, healthy, toddler I now only feel sad that I let people make me feel like a failure. I know that I wasn't, but new mums are so vulnerable.

    Support takes all forms - and sometimes women need to know that it's OK if things don't go as planned.

    Sent from my GT-P7510 using BubHub
    I couldnt agree more! I had a traumatic birth, and as part of my PTSD it was (for some reason) important to me to BF. I couldnt keep both my babies alive, I couldnt birth them 'properly' but if I could BF somehow things would be ok (not logical, but it made sense to me) With my circumstances it was a lot easier thats for sure. I did feel ill when we had to supplement with formula, but when it was that or admit my DD to hospital (where she would be given formula) We did it.
    I couldnt bear to give her bottles, it hurt too mcuh.
    But that was ME feeling like that. Noone 'made' me feel guilty, or commented on the way she was fed (in fact Ive had far more comments about BF a 2yo)
    And then I can see the flip side. I have friends who have chosen not to feed simply because they didnt like it. No 'real' reason (ie medical or mental health) just simple preferences. Yet those same friends would be horrified at my 12 month old baby eating maccas chips (no salt though), as 'no junk food' was something they valued.
    So for me, medical issues aside, its all personal (informed) choice. A baby FF from birth is no less loved than one BF till Uni. Just in a different family, with different circumstances

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimberleygal1 View Post
    who cares how they were fed, at least they were fed
    This is my view to

    I know I'm so lucky to be BF my DD without any issues at all. I was prepared to try BF but I also wasn't going to punish myself if it didn't work. I'm going to aim for 6 months and reevaluate then.

    I was BF till 4 weeks old then my mum switched to FF and that's also when I apparently stopped screaming for hours on end. My mum assumes her milk wasn't filling me up.

    The amount of expressing some of you ladies do in your normal day is insane! Kudos to you all you definitely deserve it. And kudos to all the FF cause sterilizing is a PITA!

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    I feel fortunate in some ways that over the course of seven years, I've done most combinations - bottle fed (formula and ebm), breastfed until one was 2.9 years.

    One I had to pump round the clock and comp feed for 4 months because he was in nicu/scn for 8 weeks. I've seen a lot, experienced a lot and hopefully have gained some wisdom and insight.

    We do our best. The very best we can do and we should all be celebrated because of this.

    Not told we are less or better - there's no freakin' yardstick!

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    Haven't read the whole thread but for me, any shorter or longer than 13 weeks was too short and too long.

    And I didn't stop because of a lack of support. I had heaps of support from a PND counsellor, child health clinic, LCs, Tresillian, GP, DH, family...

    I also didn't stop because I'm uneducated or secretly didn't want to BF anyway.

    I had a screaming baby that wasn't gaining weight. I was on motillium, fenugreek, litres of water a day, pumping after every feed, demand feeding, making dramatic diet changes. DD was on losec and/or Zantac, pooping green sludge and pulling her legs up to deal with stomach pain. It was hell.

    Then we switched to a prescription formula. Happy, thriving, sleeping baby.

    Breast is not always best. The benefits of BF do not outweigh putting my child through that for any longer. Or myself for that matter.

    Trying to state a minimum age is just making the problem worse. I consider every day DD got BM as a BF success. Stating a minimum age just creates another marker for failure.

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  11. #87
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    Quote Originally Posted by misskittyfantastico View Post
    We do our best. The very best we can do and we should all be celebrated because of this.

    Not told we are less or better - there's no freakin' yardstick!
    Totally

  12. #88
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    Quote Originally Posted by misskittyfantastico View Post
    We do our best. The very best we can do and we should all be celebrated because of this.

    Not told we are less or better - there's no freakin' yardstick!
    Quote Originally Posted by Cue View Post
    Trying to state a minimum age is just making the problem worse. I consider every day DD got BM as a BF success. Stating a minimum age just creates another marker for failure.

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    I don't understand what the big deal is if you fed for 6 months or 10 years!!

    I fed 3 months found it to hard gave up..no second thought..no sadness ..just went oh well lets move on to FF..

    Sorry to people who get very upset and distraught about it ..but to me..she was healthy ..happy..etc etc ...no big deal..

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    Quote Originally Posted by Clarabelle View Post
    All the current research says that it is best to breastfeed until 2. Seems sensible to me.

    MOST breastfeeding problems are temporary and although they can be very difficult to deal with and incredibly frustrating, it is my belief that if a mother wants to breastfeed, she will. It doesn't make her a failure if she doesn't - but I just think that if she is determined to breastfeed her baby, she will make it happen.
    That is incredibly insulting. "If a mother wants to breastfeed, she will". I assume you are coming from at least a professional view point? Lactation consultant or something? Otherwise how the heck would you know? Seriously? You know all about the diseases and conditions that can cause one not to be able to breastfeed? If not then I suggest you stop talking about something which you obviously know NOTHING about. It is people like you, that make women who really can't breastfeed feel like failures.

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