I put my 8yo dd to bed tonight and about 10 minutes later she came out and said that she was having bad thoughts about her brother ... that it would be better if he 'wasn't around anymore so she could have me all to herself'. She has also, in the past, told me that occasionally she has bad thoughts about people, like if someone's overweight, or mean etc., which I've assured her that those feelings are fine, but it's not nice to think mean things about other people etc., however tonight's comment threw me for a sixer. She said she knew that the thought about her brother was bad and she was genuinely upset about it and said that she didn't want him to die but just felt like he got all my attention (her brother is 3). I try to split my time equally and think I do a pretty good job at giving her 1 on 1 time, I listen intently to what she says and play lots of games with her at home. DH works long hours so I'm here alot of the time by myself and don't have any other family members around to look after 1 child while I give huge chunks of time to another child, but we have little outings together and I do the best that I can for both of them.
I don't think I handled it well tonight though because when she said that she wished her brother dead it just broke my heart, and I got upset with her and told her to go to bed, and now I can't shake this awful feeling I have. I will talk to her in the morning when I'm feeling calmer because she's asleep now, and thankfully I have calmed down and am looking forward to having a chat with her, re-assuring her that these feelings are natural from time to time and trying to work out a way for her to have more positive thoughts instead of negative ones, and turning all life situations into positive instead of negative.
Does anyone have any advice about this or has been through anything similar. I thought about making a pet rock that she can tell her worries to, then put it under her pillow at night time (because that's when she does all her thinking).