when ds#2 was 22 months we put him into a daycare centre (this was before dx) he did not adapt well, i was not told the full extent of his struggles until i approached them 4 months later after witnessing him, walking around the room screaming and crying. i was then told 'he does that all day, unless being held by one particular carer' 0_o well... THANKS FOR TELLING ME THAT EARLIER! they would always say "he has had an ok day, emotional" but never went into what that meant. upon further queries we found out he was terrified of the other kids, and would not participate in ANY activity etc.
this is what lead us to getting a dx (as my first son also with ASD was the same however he did calm down after a couple of months and eventually settled in quite well, despite not wanting to play with the other children, we did not have a dx at that stage and did not know the depth of his struggles.)
ok back to ds#2. so we removed him from care straight away. and now we are getting intervention (speech and OT)
so.. the time will come where i will be expected to get him around other children (due to quite a few circumstances, but mainly his general fear, anxiety and meltdowns, we do not socialise with other children... ) and will need to do it before school starts. so my option is what? daycare?
preschool? is one year prior to school adequate time? he will be three in a few weeks, and im feeling pressure to socialise him. and its actually giving me nightmares about it. it all ends up the same. i drop him off he loses his mind. i come back to get him to find him red faced, snotty, blood shot eyes, and them telling me he cried and screamed all day.
basically. i dont want to do it.
will age make him better? do i try at maybe three and a half? a centre seems too huge...but our paed said that he would write a pretty in depth letter to the daycare stating his eligablity for an aide. that does ease my mind, but i dont know how much time he would get. i dont think family daycare would be appropriate for his needs... and i keep reading stories on the news about teachers and carers being HORRIBLE to SN kids (caught on recordings) omg i cant bare the idea of that.
we dont have any type of SN daycare or schools around us.. >_< i dunno..
what would you do? or what have u done with your special little person?