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  1. #11
    Witwicky's Avatar
    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    Quote Originally Posted by missie_mack View Post
    Yes yes yes I so hear this. I feel like this is a bone of contention between my DH and I. Whilst DH is very supportive of AP/NP we often argue about what we should expect. He constantly complains that I cut DS too much slack and I complain that he expects too much and for our children to be 'little soldiers' like he was brought up to be (DH comes from a military family)

    I would love to hear from other AP's on what they think we should expect from our children at certain ages

    Oh and onionskin I sooo hear you on the five year old! DS is much more testing now than he ever was as a toddler. I think he is catching up for the missed terrible twos and threes that others complained about lol
    My DH and I have a similar issue. I feel like I am reminding him of DS's age and capabilities quite often...I find myself constantly saying "He's two, remember?" or "Everything is new to him!" We recently had a huge discussion about it though and he has been much better and understanding of it.

    I find that i'm acutely aware of how unrealistic these expectations are, mostly due to my own experiences. I have an amazing relationship with my father and I love him to death, but when we were children he very typically expected behaviour which just did not suit our age. I remember him brushing my hair when I was quite young and barking "Sit still. Sit still. Sit still" and getting increasingly frustrated because I couldn't stop wriggling and turning my head to look at things. Another time he told my sisters and I to clean the house while he did the lawns and he was furious to return and find us playing. Oh and he always accused us of being "silly", when really we were just being children.

    So yes, the article really spoke to me as well.

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    Thanks for posting that. I'm going to get DF to read it.

    I, too, feel like I am always saying "he is only 2! He doesn't know!". DF definitely expect too much of DS.

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  4. #13
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    FearlessLeader is offline Winner 2013 - Most Memorable Thread
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    We are lucky in that I worked in CC for a long time so have worked lots with all age groups, I don't have unrealistic expectations of DS and it makes life much more cruisey (not that i never get super frustrated when he can't do something I'd like him to do) and DP sees me as the expert so just asks me 'should he be able to x?' Or 'is it worth me asking him to y?' I kinda worry about when he's primary school age as that's unchartered territory for me.

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    Thankyou. Definately something i am going to keep reminding myself of.

    Thanks for sharing

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  8. #15
    Witwicky's Avatar
    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    Bump

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    love this link too!! i have saved it on my computer for when i am having one of ''those days'' so i can go read it and get my perspective back!!

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    Thanks for sharing. Just today DH and I were talking about his unrealistic expectations with DS.

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    Default 10 Ways We Misunderstand Children

    Bumping this for anyone who hasn't seen it. I read this often. Thanks Witwicky.

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    Witwicky  (17-02-2013)

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    Default Re: 10 Ways We Misunderstand Children

    Subbing

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    Default 10 Ways We Misunderstand Children

    This is exactly what i needed to bring me back to reality.i know that I often expectations that are to unrealistic


 

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