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  1. #1
    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    Default Gift etiquette

    If someone buys you an outfit for your child do you think it's polite to dress them in it the next time you see them/take a photo of them in it and send it to them to thank them?I ask because I'm so over SIL.

    I've bought our nephew so many gorgeous outfits that I think suit him, but also match SILs taste and she never ever dresses him in them. I've never seen him in them in person or in photos and I find it so rude! I always buy the size he fits (ask her before I buy it) and buy something that suits the season that he'll be wearing it in so it's got nothing to do with conditions.

    DP and I went to Port Douglas 2 weeks ago and bought nephew a onesie that will fit him in summer, it's a life saver one - we didn't give it to SIL in person as she was sleeping, but MIL passed it on to her and we didn't get a thank you (I know he won't be wearing it until summer- or ever, but a little thanks would be polite).

    I was always brought up following the etiquette that if someone buys you clothes as a gift, you wear them next time you see them or send a picture of you wearing them or similar and I've always done this up until now, even if I think it's horrible.

    Do you do the same?
    Last edited by rainbow road; 07-05-2012 at 15:47.

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    I don't have kids but when I've bought clothes for little babies I babysit for Xmas etc they always thank me either by text or in person the next time etc and normally dress them in it when I next babysit

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    I always try to but now that my kids are older it is sometimes really hard to do. If i try to dress my DD is an outfit she hates she will kick, scream, run etc and make it near impossible - in this instance i just won't put the clothes on her even if it was a gift. I will say thank you though.

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    HugsBunny is offline Once upon a time there was a bunny.........
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    Isn't it possible that she's putting the child in the clothes on other days?

    I understand you're upset that she hasn't even said Thankyou and I would be too but I don't really understand being upset over not seeing a picture of him in the outfit tbh.

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    I agree, I always take a pic to send (which is easy to do on my phone then txt it off) or when we visit I'll dress dd in it. If I don't happen to take a photo I'll always tell whoever that she wore it and looked so adorable/ got lots of comments on it etc. And I always always always thank the person. It's just the way I was brought up to be polite and gracious. I think it's very rude to not even say thank you.

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    I think putting them in a photo and sending it is a bit ott. However where possible I would def put my child in the clothes and always thank the person...

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    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    He's 9 months old so it's not a matter of him choosing an outfit, but MM - I understand that which is why I don't buy for older kids unless they point it out and like it at another time

    Maybe she is putting him in the clothes on other days but to be honest, I doubt it. But I guess it's weird to me as it's not how I was brought up and DP feels the same.

    I was just curious if my expectations are too high or something...

    I've bought him so many outfits since he was born and haven't seen him in one, and I do find that strange. I guess I'd just rather spend my money on a gift for someone who will appreciate the thought I put into it. It's the same with toys too - we bought him a gorgeous soft lamb when he was born that still has the tag on and is on a shelf in SILs bedroom. It's just a cuddly toy, and DP picked it out and made sure it was suitable for newborns and everything and yet it's still there, unloved

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    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    Quote Originally Posted by melimum View Post
    I agree, I always take a pic to send (which is easy to do on my phone then txt it off) or when we visit I'll dress dd in it. If I don't happen to take a photo I'll always tell whoever that she wore it and looked so adorable/ got lots of comments on it etc. And I always always always thank the person. It's just the way I was brought up to be polite and gracious. I think it's very rude to not even say thank you.
    I agree. I'd only send a pic if they lived far away and I couldn't visit them. Usually it'd just be - dress them in it when you next see them.

    I just thought it was standard clothes gift etiquette as it is in my family and circle of friends!
    Last edited by rainbow road; 07-05-2012 at 15:48.

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    Yes I always tried to do that with DD. Sometimes I would forget though, or forget who sent what.

    I know that FOB once bought a gorgeous outfit for his nephew (it was basically a mini-version of the type of outfit FOB usually wore himself) and his sister never put it on the kid because "it was too good and would get ruined". She probably sold it on ebay.

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    Oh gosh, if I was expected to put my kids in the clothes that was bought for them the next time I saw that person or was expected to take a photo of them in it I'd rather they didn't bother. Seriously, when I'm trying to get three kids out of the door in the morning thinking about who they are seeing and what they should be wearing is the furthest thing from my mind.
    I do always say thankyou though. My mum sees my kids pretty regularly and buys them clothes often and sometimes she'll ask if I have put them in an outfit yes and my answer will be 'yeah, 3 or 4 times now, it's just in the wash.' The only time I try to remember to put them in something specific is if the person who bought it absolute loves it and I don't think much of it. Otherwise they just get cycled with the rest of the clothes that I do actually like.

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