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  1. #1
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    Default Toilet Training ADVICE PLEASE

    Well after another attempt to get DS (nearly 3) to sit on potty or toilet he is refusing to do so and just cries he knows when he is going to pooh and I say come on sit on potty or toilet and he just runs away hides his face and cries...we have tried letting him watch us and also letting him sit on potty clothed but when it comes to using it he wont and he is starting to not let us change nappy pants at times........just don't know what to do as he is heading to 3 un toilet trained.

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    Dd was the same - she was ok to sit on the potty clothed, but without she would freakout. I dont really know what the turning point was for her - perhaps its the fact that i put the potty in the loungeroom in front if the tv and it was a distraction? (not ideal - but you do what you gotta do!) she now quite happily undresses and goes in the potty, and occasionally ises the toilet step we have. Not really any helpful advice tho.. Sorry. Maybe he just isn't ready yet?

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    thanks for that tip we have tried that a while ago but didn't work............ he is just so defiant with ALOT of things :-( little mister mind of his own he is!
    Will just keep trying I am just thinking I am a bad mum as most kids are trained by this age :-( just don't know where I am going wrong and it is making me so deflated.

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    My ds is 3 in July and not toilet trained either

    He was nappy free for 2 months and then started hiding behind things to poo/wee. He's back in nappies because I got sick of cleaning it up.

  5. #5
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    threechooks is offline If my spelling annoys you that's your problem.... I have better things to do than proofread !
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    Smarties!!!! Tiny sweet treats for a job well done. It may not come out of the 'perfect parent' handbook but it works for us

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    My DS turned 3 in January. I had tried many times from about 2.5 years to train him but he wasn't interested. We have had to 'fight' him for everything - another who has his own mind and way of doing things!

    DS was going into the preschool room at the start of the year and we were supposed to have him toilet trained by then... That didn't happen, but we kept persisting (rewarding with surprises, role playing - DS liked to be a cat or a dog, and just encouraging as much as possible). Up until about 3 weeks ago he was having between 3 and 5 accidents a day, but in the last 3 weeks it has just clicked for him.

    We tried everything including a sticker chart, but nothing helped. In the beginning we had him in jocks from the time he woke, nappy at rest time, jocks as soon as he woke again until he went to bed at night. We would just take him to the toilet without the 'do you need to go' (sometimes kicking and screaming) every 30-45 minutes in the beginning, and then we would space it out to every hour when we weren't having accidents. Once he got that he needed to go we would say 'off you go to the toilet' and let him go by himself, he prefers being in there by himself. He now goes off to the toilet whenever he needs to without reminding. It will happen, it just takes a bit of time and A LOT patients

    Thank goodness the worst is over for us, because I am about 5 weeks away from bub #3 and the extra washing would kill me!!

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    We started TT our son just before he was 2 (cause he showed us he knew when wee and poos were coming), so big age difference but I reckon the best tip if to committ fully to it, no half hearted attempts. DS was either nudey on his bottom half or wearing training undies. We started off with hourly timed toilet sits (you could probably go longer for an older kid). If he started to wee/poo in the undies we'd (hopefully) catch him and whisk him off to sit on the loo. Often on and off he'd resist sitting on the loo but you just have to persevere. I think he was too young to fully get reward charts but we praised him when he went on the loo.

    What happens if you leave your DS nudey rudey? And what about if you just pick him up and plonk him on the loo?? I'm mean maybe hahaha.

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    Quote Originally Posted by threechooks View Post
    Smarties!!!! Tiny sweet treats for a job well done. It may not come out of the 'perfect parent' handbook but it works for us
    Yep this! Dd gets one smarty for going on the toilet and she happily does both poos and wees, her problem is being defiant and "too busy" to go to the toilet then she has an accident. But once she is on there, she is fine.

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    Our second daughter we let her play with the potty with her toys for a while before trying. She prefers the big toilet to the potty, and can pull herself on and off. We got her toilet books which we kept in there. She would sit there for hours if we let her. We also did the smarties thing, with both children. Started when she would just sit on there, even without doing anything. Big praise, a reward and encouragement for next time. Wees were easy, but she refused to poo for a while and would bring us a nappy instead, so first couple of poos on the toilet we gave her a bigger treat (easter egg) and then gradually went down to where she no longer gets treats at all, just much praise and high fives. We went to the shop and made the hugest deal out of buying her knickers. She chose the ones she wanted, and we told her that they were very special, she was a big girl etc, it's very important to keep them clean or they will be ruined and go in the bin and I think that's a big part of it. She loves those damn knickers.

  10. #10
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    Oh you poor love - you're not a bad mum!! Toilet training can be harrowing

    I initially started with my just turned 2 year old and it was the most stressful week of my life and my DD1 was still not trained. I then read more about the 3 day potty training method, and followed that loosely which was a lot more successful.

    What I did:

    1. I stopped TT for about 6 weeks so I could 'deprogram' her with what I was doing previously. But during this time every time I changed her nappy would keep on going on how yucky poo and wees are in the nappy

    2. Kept the potty in the bathroom and did not sit her on there at all to 'try'

    3. Made a big deal of buying her undies and kept on going on about what a big girl she was

    4. Figured out what incentive I was going to use when she did a wee or poo on the potty (in our case it was tic tacs and a sticker chart)

    5. When the 6 weeks passed, I had her just in undies and a top and stuck to her like glue. When she needed to go, or was started to wee or poo, I would rush her to the potty. If she got anything in the potty or toilet, I would make the biggest deal about it and then she would get her incentive.

    6. Got her to drink lots and lots of liquid in those initial training days so she needed to go a lot and we could practise.

    7. Instead of asking her if she needed to go, I would say 'you tell Mummy if you need to do a wee or poo and we'll go to the toilet' all day and reiterating that we need to keep our undies dry and clean.

    8. When they have accidents, as frustrating as it can be, is not be angry or show frustratation. Just keep saying we need to keep our undies dry and clean.

    Where I differ from the 3 day potty training method is that I didnt get rid of nappies completely - I have her in them for naps and nighttime. Also, I was unable to train her in 3 days and one of my friends told me to look at TT as a process. This saved me a lot of stress. When we would venture out, I would have her in pullups which I also referred to as undies although this does not work for everyone. Sometimes nappies need to be taken away completely. But if she told me she needed to go, I would take her to the toilet - you have to be consistent.

    Anyway we are now about 3 months down the track, and she has not had an accident for a couple of weeks so we're slowly getting there. I will then tackle nappies at naps.

    Sorry for the long winded post. This is only one way, and what worked for us. There may be better and more effective ways. I find toilet training so challenging because its something that you can't control - you can only teach your little one the steps and eventually they'll get it.

    I really hope this helps and good luck


 

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