How do you deal with being sworn at and yelled at?

[Eclecticdreamer]

I certainly hope you call the police when it happens again. You tried talking to the mother she believes she is letting her child grow naturally and make her own choices. I think that kid needs to learn up front that their choices have consequences and your daughter should not learn that people who make bad choices get away with it. I think this is an excellent opportunity for both kids involved to learn something extremely important.

Your child should be the top priority! Your daughter is being emotionally abused and is learning that emotional abuse is just a part of life you have to deal with. Please call the police the next time it happens. I would be sure to have your daughter witness the ordeal so that she sees that people who make bad choices do have consequences. The neighbors child isn't a bad person they just made a bad choice and can still grow and change.

I really hope things get worked out this story is so upsetting. ;(

[EvilWombatQueen]

I'd call the police but point them in the direction of the mother, not the child. It's the mother who needs to learn some 'natural consequences' of her parenting style.

[mrsd]

The child is 8. I don't know how long you are going to have to survive living next to this family, SAB, but you will need your own "scarepower" if you may have to be there for the next decade!

The sprinklers would be funny but the real point is "why?" It sounds like the poor kid needs boundaries which are not supplied at home. I assume that she comes over when she wants to play. That must mean that your natural consequence of refusing to let her do so till she cleans up her act will eventually work.

I would ignore the content of outbursts (ie. Don't bother arguing) and instead, when she pauses, say, "I will not listen when I'm being sworn at. I will not allow DD to be sworn at. Come back in a week and try asking nicely and we will think about it again."

I know you'd rather they didn't play at all but perhaps you may actually be able to make the difference in her manners which her mum is unable (or unwilling) to make.

Personally, I wouldnt call the police on an 8yo unless they're violent or vandals.

[goldtoe]

To those people saying "call the police", what do you expect this to achieve?
What do you expect the police to do?

There is no easy answer to this. The civilised approach has failed. Show the mother some "natural consequences" to her appalling behaviour. You may need to be creative. Are the neighbours renting?
I hope she is intelligent enough that confrontation will not inevitably lead to continued escalation.

[VintageLover]

Calling the police will address the mothers non action. She will know she has to control the appalling behaviour of her child.

No way in hell I'd be putting up with it.

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