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  1. #1
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    Default Friend vent

    Hi all sorry to vent here but I can't stand it anymore I need to get it out. It's not worth saying anything to her because I've done it before and nothing changes

    I seen a friend tonight, haven't seen her for months and she was telling her DD off for twirling when they went to the supermarket, her DS copies her and she falls over.

    I wish she would allow her to be a child and do these things. It is not her fault that her DS falls over he's a bit clumsy anyway.

    She hates being a mother and I hate going there because I worry that I am going to play something with her DD that DS won't be allowed to do and DD will get in trouble for.

    We have had so many arguments about this is redicilous.

  2. #2
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    I wouldn't allow twirling in a supermarket either, not really safe or acceptable behaviour

    Sounds like theres more here that you haven't said so vent away.

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  4. #3
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    TimTamsandTea is offline ...if only all relationships were so perfectly sweet!
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    I think some big people have quite high and unreasonable expectations of little people.
    I'm glad we're moving away from the idea that children should be seen and not heard and children are more visible and included. But the down side to this is that undue pressure is placed on kids to behave more like adults than children and that's just terribly sad.
    Jeepers, I'm with you OP - let the children twirl! Better still, let them get giddy and fall down laughing. Provided they are not getting in the way of fellow shoppers, let them have a little fun. It's their reward for being hauled along to a boring and garishly-lit supermarket

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  6. #4
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    Just to extend
    Ds would not be allowed to twirl around in a supermarket for the same reasons he is not allowed to run

    There is a very real potential for him to trip and hurt not only himself but others,

    Supermarkets are never child friendly unfortunately and I would never forgive myself if he tripped into glass or a display and hurt himself

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  8. #5
    TimTamsandTea's Avatar
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    I let ds1 play 'find the monster' in the supermarket the other day.
    That meant running up and down the aisle a few time, bobbing down to check underneath the shelves.
    It was 10am on a Monday morning. The supermarket was dead. The aisle was wide and free of displays.
    We were halfway through a list. It helped him let off a little steam.
    At no time was he allowed to touch anything. Ds also responds well to 'Stop', which I would've used had anybody entered the aisle.
    My support of the OP doesn't mean I encourage behaving in any old fashion in a public space. But big people expeditions, such as a supermarket shop, often need to be broken down into manageable parts for little people. For me, that means letting ds get out of the trolley every now and again and using up a bit of youthful energy under my watchful eye.

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    I think not allowing twirling is pretty extreme!!! I'm with you OP!

    If you had said she wouldn't let the kids play chasey or hide and seek in the supermarket - different story!

    Let kids be kids, twirling in a supermarket is hardly dangerous!

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    Sorry...but why are you telling someone else how to parent their child?

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    This reminds me of a shopping trip I had with my DD not long ago actually, she wasn't quite 3 at the time but hates grocery shopping as do i really so can't blame her. Anyway, we played a game that if she sat in the trolley she could sing some songs to me. Well DD is a very loud little girl and was "singing" with her loud voice, but because she couldn't say all the words she would make them up and it sounded a little like yelling. When it got to this point i said let's sing another song that she did know needless to say an old lady told me how naughty my DD was being and that she should be quiet at the shops. Haha I couldn't help but say something because if she wanted to see naughty I would let my DD out of the trolley and she could see naughty, DD likes to run off. Twirling at the shop would be no big deal for me atleast she would be nearer to me. I like the idea of find the monster I might try that one.

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    yelling doesnt phase me, neither do *other peoples* children running / twirling etc etc as long as they arent crashing and smashing into me or my ds

    Theyre children and theyre behaving as children do.

    Evidently this womans child twirling in a store DOES bother her (as it would worry me if MY son was doing it, I would try to keep him distracted with something else)

    If my son wants to run / twirl etc in a park or at home or somewhere there is NOT likely to be large piles of display items that he could potentially crash into injuring himself and or others then that is fine again I am talking about my child NOT anyone elses

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    Nemmi i hope you don't think I meant any disrespect to your rules there yours and that's fine I agree to some extent because I keep DD in a trolley as much as possible because I don't want her to run off. It just reminded me of that time at the supermarket it still makes me laugh at how uptight the old lady was. I really feel for her grandkids if she has any because they would have to be on their best behaviour at all times.

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