If every parent around the world said "no toy weapons" then I'd be all for saying no too. But, kids need to have a childhood and every parent needs to find the right balance for their child. I sent my DS to school for the first time last year, worried that he'd be the bully/rough one, as we have tried to make sure he is emotionally strong and confident, and wondered if we'd gone too far. BUT he was the and nerdy/eager to learn one yet he seems to have lots of friends. He has a friend that is not allowed anything rough and he is timid/shy/barely talks and his mum tells me how worried she is because he isn't interested in reading/writing and hasn't excelled at all in 3 terms of school and hasn't made any friends other than DS . He still clings to his mum after 3 terms and I can see how stressed it makes her. I'm not saying all kids who aren't allowed anything rough will turn out like this, but was just putting our experiences out there. It is so hard to know what to do as a parent, not just in this situation, in ALL situations .
I think you can only do your best.
Guns and weapons dont (imo) turn kids into tough rough nuts..
But for me, they do teach that killing and maiming are a great way of getting rid of energy, anger and frustration.
For me, I would prefer another type of energy and anger release.
Nothing quite like watching your children Avada Kedavra-ing one another (yes, that's totally a verb) and just as realistic as a lightsaber or laser gun.
(BlissedOut, you're just a softie. I'll see your Expeliarmus and I'll raise you a Petrificus Totalus.)
My DS doesn't have any toy guns other than nerf for the record, but he does play roughly with sticks or anything he finds in the yard/nature walks, which to me is like a weapon, if people really want to hurt someone they will, with anything. DS knows it is not acceptable behaviour to hurt people. How does your DS(s) vent their anger/energy Berylsmum?
DH work has been held up with knives/needles/broken alcohol bottles but never a gun. I think that is more prevalent in the US and other countries.
Another aspect to think about is doesn't sport encourage violence to a certain degree? They get into fights all the time in football/rugby/soccer etc. Do you let your children watch/play sport?
i am going to make myself sound hippy dippy now...
anger is expressed by.
screaming in the backyard
So far, the only rules are no weapons and no computer games/consoles. An Uncle has already promised DS a quad bike when he is older.. that is never going to happen! I don't really care what my son plays with, as long as it doesn't promote spending hours sitting on his bum or harming people/creatures around him.
They are fab ways Berylsmum, I don't think they sound hippy at all, I think most children would be encouraged to do all of the above . I especially think talking is a THE MOST important thing to do with your children (and hugs!). But what do you tell your children if they pick up a stick for example, and want to whack it on the ground, or swing it around, or poke it around a rock to explore? I'm not saying it's wrong to tell them not to, I just want to know what people that say no to weapons would do in this situation- as I'd be stumped lol. I'd feel like I would have to follow my DS 24/7.
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