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  1. #1
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    Question Trying to conceive.

    Hi Dads.

    My wife and I have just started trying to conceive. We have just been through her second cycle and there are a couple of things that I wanted to see if other men had experienced.
    1. Did your partner turn a little bit into a crazy person at first? Being obsessed with internal temperatures being mapped out on graphs, logging when her nipples were feeling hard or soft, both are troublesome it seems.
    2. Did your acts of love making go from being extremely passionate to passionless sessions of "OK, fill me up!".
    3. After she apparently obvulated, did your partner then become obsessed with symptom spotting? Reading that she may be pregnant if she has to go to the toilet a lot more, and then going for a wee every 15 minutes? Looking at her breasts and asking if they had grown? Holding her tummy and saying "it feels different"?

    I know it is early days and all very exciting! I just want to know if any other dads here have had similar experiences or any funny stories of how their partner acted when they first started try to concieve.

  2. #2
    BH-bigbadbrad's Avatar
    BH-bigbadbrad is offline ADMINISTRATOR
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    Hi Megaman,

    Welcome to the Forum and the Dads area.

    I have to say you are either very new or extremely brave, possibly both.

    It is normally not a good idea to make fun of the mums in the Forum, I'm actually quite surprised that you have not been piled on already.

    Sounds like your partner is just EXTREMELY keen to conceive! I would not take it personally. However as the 'old man' of the site I should point out that in my experience, the harder couple try to conceive and the more pressure they put on themselves the harder it is for them. I know of many couple who tried for years (touch wood) and then feel pregnant almost as soon as they stopped trying!

    The body can tell when you are tense so as hard as it might be to tell her (break it to her gently and blame me) it might help to remind her of that and encourage her to enjoy the act and relax.

    All the best
    BBB

  3. #3
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    Thanks for the advice about relaxing. I will certinatly try and do things to relax my OH. Sharing A box of chocolates usually does it

    With the other matter, I honestly feel very disappointed that there seems to be no place for men to FREELY vent any frustrations that they may have and seek advice openly from other Dads. The women on this forum can happily say whatever they want, however because I am a man any comment I make must then be read and judged. Why?

    If I cannot have freedom if speech here then where can I? I have been searching for many evenings a forum for dads. Only ones I find seem to not have had any activity since 2010 or only have 4 members. I have just as much right as any women to want to talk to people of my sex going through a similar situation. I feel I should not be judged for making a little fun of my OH because she is the wife instead of the husband.

    So let the floodgates open and please feel free to post your true feelings about this, but if you do please also give me some advice as where I can talk to people my age, gender and in the same situation?

  4. #4
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    Hey Megaman! I say "pfft" to not offending the female 97% of the forum - they offend me all the damn time!

    No, I love ya's all, you know that. NOW GET OUT OF THE DAD'S CHAT SECTION!

    Seriously though mate, just ask away. Yes, there are plenty of stories from the ladies here too about how "in to" conceiving they get. And yeah, what once was a loving and enjoyable experience for you both has now become a job. Takes the joy out of it doesn't it!

    I would try to explain to your wife that you're only just starting! Cease the contraception and just go gangbusters like it's your honeymoon again! That's how it was for me and my ex-DW. We decided that it was kid time, stopped contraception, and within a couple of months we were seeing two lines on the tests!

    So see how you go! If, after trying for some time, you have no joy, THEN look deeper into times and ovulations etc! But the two of you should try to enjoy it!

    Good luck! And don't be afraid to ask anything. Most of the members here are pretty awesome - even the ones with girl germs!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Megaman View Post
    Hi Dads.

    My wife and I have just started trying to conceive. We have just been through her second cycle and there are a couple of things that I wanted to see if other men had experienced.
    1. Did your partner turn a little bit into a crazy person at first? Being obsessed with internal temperatures being mapped out on graphs, logging when her nipples were feeling hard or soft, both are troublesome it seems.
    2. Did your acts of love making go from being extremely passionate to passionless sessions of "OK, fill me up!".
    3. After she apparently obvulated, did your partner then become obsessed with symptom spotting? Reading that she may be pregnant if she has to go to the toilet a lot more, and then going for a wee every 15 minutes? Looking at her breasts and asking if they had grown? Holding her tummy and saying "it feels different"?

    I know it is early days and all very exciting! I just want to know if any other dads here have had similar experiences or any funny stories of how their partner acted when they first started try to concieve.
    Hehe! Sorry boys I 'accidentally" clicked into this post (fat pregnancy fingers you see) lol
    Anywhos! I dont think it's possible for any of us ladies to bite at what you posted as... TBH its EXACTLY what we are like well at least I know I was

    *backs out of wrong section*
    :waves:

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    Thanks for the honest advice! I feel much better

    OH just wants to be prego so badly, I hope it doesn't bring her down too much. She is really struggling with just letting go and waiting to see if our efforts have worked! I suggested having some "Prego" sauce from Aporto, but she didn't seem to think it would work. Can't hurt was my argument.

    Will just have to wait and see what happens...

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Megaman View Post
    Hi Dads.

    My wife and I have just started trying to conceive. We have just been through her second cycle and there are a couple of things that I wanted to see if other men had experienced.
    1. Did your partner turn a little bit into a crazy person at first? Being obsessed with internal temperatures being mapped out on graphs, logging when her nipples were feeling hard or soft, both are troublesome it seems.
    2. Did your acts of love making go from being extremely passionate to passionless sessions of "OK, fill me up!".
    3. After she apparently obvulated, did your partner then become obsessed with symptom spotting? Reading that she may be pregnant if she has to go to the toilet a lot more, and then going for a wee every 15 minutes? Looking at her breasts and asking if they had grown? Holding her tummy and saying "it feels different"?

    I know it is early days and all very exciting! I just want to know if any other dads here have had similar experiences or any funny stories of how their partner acted when they first started try to concieve.
    *tiptoes in to wrong section*

    1. Yes I turned in to a crazy person. Completely normal OH you have!
    2. Definitely - it won't be just you feeling this way, trust me. Right now your liquid gold is all that matters, not how it happens
    3. Yep, we become obsessive, compulsive hypochondriacs and love to read in to EVERY little sign!!

    Your OH is just super excited to finally be TTC and desperately wants those 2 fantastic lines to appear. Take it in your stride and enjoy the ride....because this is nothing compared to the pregnancy hormones

    Congratulations and good luck. Don't be bothered by others that may berate you for being honest. Some women on this forum sadly turn on each other all the time too for having different opinions, so your man bits has nothing to do with the judging!

    *tiptoes back with tail between legs*

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    It's really easy to get carried away with and obsessed with the symptoms, you might even start heading that way after a while.
    My best advice would be to try and convince her to relax, it will quite seriously do your head in. After 18 months of me and my OH trying and 18 months of possible pregnancy symptoms the let down each time it's a negative can really get you and your partner down. We had to try really hard not to think about it.
    After 18 months and seeing a fertility specialist at 12 months, we were told the only hope was IVF. We gave up and starting saving. At 18 months we decided we had enough money to go through with IVF.. and I kid you not the day we decided we had enough money, and thought yes lets do this IVF thing was the day we found out she was pregnant.

    It happened when we least expected it, we'd given up were not trying and were even told we couldn't conceive naturally.

  9. #9
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    Can I suggest that you let her worry about all that kind of stuff.

    Sex is mean to be passionate and fun - keep it all about that for you. If she wants the 'quickie' to 'fill her up', try to find a fun way of doing it.

    If she is doing all the mapping and so on, it should be easy to know when she wants sex - plan things around these times. When my wife and I were trying to conceive, she would want sex for 1 week of the month and that's it, so have fun with it. Practice, practice and more practice, it should be fun, fun and more fun.


 

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