How to love yourself?

[Cleigh]

I have always hated myself. Hated my personality, my body, my boobs, my skin. Just everything. I have TRIED soo hard to like me. I really have. Even if I have such nice clothes and all dressed up I just want to cry at how I feel. Its so bad these days I cant even enjoy doing things I like because I dread seeing pretty girls I dread seeing how gorgeous and slender their bodies are. How beautiful their faces are... even if it is covered in makeup. Its nothing to do with wanting people to like me more just ME. I dont like anything about me and I want to be thin. I want to be able to look in the mirror and love me.

How do you look past the outside and not care? I try and pretend to be all confident (otherwise I wouldnt leave the house) but I just feel like Im always in peoples way, always to big to be near people.

I got so upset last night. My DP just doesnt understand because he loves me the way I am. This is how he has always known me. This is how I have always known me.. Well not this big but always bigger then everyone else.
I will never change. Im too lazy. But I just lok in the mirror and inmagine takign a knife and cutting it all away

[scarymarygoldfish]

Oh honey, it breaks my heart to read this. I'm so sorry you feel this way. The funny thing is that all of the women you think are prettier or smaller than yourself are thinking the same thing about you. I swear this is true!! I bet that if you were to see someone your size from behind, you'd be jealous of how thin they are.

Have you tried positive affirmations? Affirmations for self-esteem? I looked at a few online which I think are nice:

Today, I honor my body. I love myself, and I treat myself with respect.

Today, I let my heart fill with as much love as it can hold, and I express that love to all that I encounter, whether they be human, animal or plant life. I treat others as I would like to be treated: with kindness, compassion, respect and love. I express love to myself, and treat myself as I would like others to treat me: with kindness, compassion, respect and love.

Today, I acknowledge the inner light within me, and I honor that inner light, for it is the true source of my beauty. I share that inner light with everyone I encounter. I remember that my beauty has nothing to do with my body size or weight - my beauty has everything to do with who I am, and I honor that person, always.

Today, I believe in myself, trust myself, love myself, respect myself, honor myself, appreciate myself and value myself. I am a beautiful person, and I let each of my thoughts and actions express that belief.

You are much loved Cleigh. You are a wonderful person . You are truly beautiful.

[London]

I remember when I met you I was jealous of who you were. You seemed soo confident in who you were and didnt give a sh!t what anyone else thought...and werent afraid to give them a piece of your mind either
I know this is absolutely no help whatsoever, but I think you're awesome hun and I hope you can find a way to love yourself