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  1. #41
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    I believe that it is a form of child abuse to tell your child that they are going to hell if they sin.

    I grew up with this drummed into me. Being told that there will be a nuclear war where eyes will consume away in sockets and tongues in mouths and that if I sinned and Jesus came back right at that moment - I wouldn't make it and I'd die. I even saw documentaries of nuclear haulicausts and saw the devastation of a nuclear bomb and would have nightmares about it. I'd have nightmares of dying and of seeing all my family and friends ascending to heaven while the world was being destroyed and them all looking at me as if to say "Well you were told".

    I believed for a very very long time that I was going to hell for doing even the smallest things wrong. No talk of grace at all, and of cause now I actually understand what grace is...I actually drum grace into my kids now.

    Yes it is spiritual abuse in the very least!

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    I'd love to have my pets in heaven but not dust mites or flies :/

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by GothChick View Post
    I have told DD about hell. I have never used it as a form of punishment or discipline, jeeze, that is just wrong.

    I have told her that bad people go to hell and good people go to heaven.She asked me if that meant that all kidnappers and robbers to go hell even if they have just stolen 'like a tv'',and I said 'unless they are truly sorry for what they have done yes, and God knows if you are truly sorry for something, not just pretending to be, so if these people that do really horrible things in the world are sorry,truly sorry in their hearts, and they do no more bad things like that ever again, then they might get to go to heaven, it's up to God'.
    I wanted her to know that just because someone does one really bad thing in their life, it does not mean they are damned to hell forever.

    As for people who do not believe in God, I have told her that it is up to God as to whether he allows them into heaven, if they have led very good lives and have been a kind person on earth, he might let them in once they meet him and decide they DO believe in him.

    As you can see, I pick my own version of things to tell DD as she is only 7,and I think that is okay for us, as long as she gets the fundamentals, be kind to others etc, I think she'l be fine.

    I just have a question for you about the way you have decided to explain the concept to your child. Have you ever worried/wondered about how literal your explanation might sound to her? Children take things that are explained to them by a trusted adult as very literal, and it occured to me that your child might worry about not being truly sorry for something that they might do - for example if she smacks her brother/friend and says sorry but isn't really, will her little 7yo mind worry that she is going to hell? I'm not trying to upset you, but this idea really jumped out at me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Clarabelle View Post
    I just have a question for you about the way you have decided to explain the concept to your child. Have you ever worried/wondered about how literal your explanation might sound to her? Children take things that are explained to them by a trusted adult as very literal, and it occured to me that your child might worry about not being truly sorry for something that they might do - for example if she smacks her brother/friend and says sorry but isn't really, will her little 7yo mind worry that she is going to hell? I'm not trying to upset you, but this idea really jumped out at me.
    That's alright, doesn't upset me at all. I have told her hell is for adults only, no child goes to hell because children are still learning right from wrong. If she hit her brother and wasnt sorry, that would be okay (although I'd be having a chat to her and making her understand why she should be sorry) because children sometimes lack empathy and understanding of what they have done, and it's hard to be sorry for something you feel you were justified in doing....but as you get older, and learn right from wrong, the rules change.

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    I understand Life and how it works, and death still scares me...

    Its another one of those things that is just so personal.
    Belief, religion, attitude to death, are all personal things that have no right or wrong.
    The only wrong is when people belittle and condescend others for what they have chosen to believe. This makes me question a person.

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    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    I believe it is important to teach children about death as well - my comments about Jesus dying were more centred around him being murdered in the manner that he was. I vividly remember the story and the accompanying depictions.

    I don't think it is ever okay to threaten a child to go to hell. Whether that threat is extreme or minor, I think the concept is simply awful. A child should never have to fear going to a place of punishment for all eternity, surrounded by "bad" people. I sincerely believe that is emotional child abuse, along with threatening other 'punishments' (I.e.: a policeman taking them away etc)

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    Quote Originally Posted by BerylsMum View Post
    I understand Life and how it works, and death still scares me...

    Its another one of those things that is just so personal.
    Belief, religion, attitude to death, are all personal things that have no right or wrong.
    The only wrong is when people belittle and condescend others for what they have chosen to believe. This makes me question a person.
    Exactly one of the reason I oppose organised religion as they are pretty much insisting people believe what 'they' the religion in question propose to be true.

    I find thinking about the fact that my children may be left without their mother or father at some point, and vice versa - 'upsetting' - so you could say death 'scares' me in that sense?

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    yes i agree 5itb!a lot of religious people push religion..but lately i seem to see it more and more from atheists.it has become a religion of sorts.So many try to belittle and question religious people with as much aggression as the fundys.why is that? it seems so ironic.and of course its not all but seems to be the in thing.

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  12. #49
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    btw...i mean this in general...not at you personally five!

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    I just think it is a minority rebelling against the majority?

    ..and yes there are secular movements (groups of people who share a similar train of thought). From what I have read and listened to the 'aggression' comes from looking at history and alot of the human rights violations that have come about ~ they are 'fighting' for a freedom.


 

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