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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by NutsyK View Post
    Wow.. if I have a child at my house they go by my rules.. If I had a child calling my children names I'd certainly have words with them and that would be without me asking their "mum" for permission to "tell them off". Same with my DD being at other peoples houses... she follows their rules and they are free to tell her off as long as they're not absolutely screaming at her.. laying a hand on her.. or swearing at her or something.

    NutsyK
    Quote Originally Posted by NutsyK View Post
    Then I suggest not letting your DD go on playdates without you.
    Thank you for that suggestion.
    My problem was that I had never thought for a second someone would take it upon themselves to discipline my child like that. My fault.

    I now make it clear that if there is ever a problem with my daughter at your house, you call me and I will come and pick her straight up.

  2. #22
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    I don't think you over-reacted at all Gothchick.
    If my 4yo DS was placed in t/o, especially for an innocent comment like that, and made to feel shamed and humiliated I would feel just the same, as regardless of how I choose to discipline him, it is not their place to enforce a punishment.
    A quick word with the child if they feel it's appropriate, politely telling them what the boundaries are in their home, redirection, and then a word with me if necessary, and that's all that's needed on their behalf.

    I would never send a child visiting my home to t/o for inappropriate behaviour, but then I don't use t/o with my own kids either.

    It doesn't sound like the dad was very empathetic towards your daughter at all, and if he had been, he would have realised she just wasn't aware that it was game over. Everyone makes mistakes, even grown ups, and not all are intentional. He overstepped the line.
    Sadly not all grown ups have skills in being empathetic towards others, especially kids..

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to Sindrii For This Useful Post:

    GothChick  (03-04-2012)

  4. #23
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    I would never tolerate seeing my child put in a naughty corner. That's serious discipline, and that's my responsibility. But a talking to, an explanation and being separated for a bit is find with me. I wouldn't want a phone call for that. I'd be annoyed tbh.

  5. #24
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    OP i think you are very considerate and im sure the parent would appreciate you mentioning it to her.

    @ Gothchick, i would be fuming if someone treated my child like that. Most of us are aware our children are not perfect and we instill the best we can. When DD is old enough and im dropping her for playdates i will always ask the parent if there is a problem to let me know as soon as she can.

    @nutsyK i have read some of your posts over the past few days, not just on a thread i posted but others and i seriously question your motives on BH.

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    GothChick  (03-04-2012)

  7. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by NutsyK View Post
    Yay I have the opposite of fans haha. I don't have any motives. I reply to threads and posts as I see them. If you don't like it tough luck I guess No hard feelings on my part.
    Hey Nuts, I'm a fan of yours and I like how you tell it like it is, however,she is right, you have been narky the last few days.

    Hope you're okay.

  8. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by NutsyK View Post
    The time - out thing was excessive.. I don't think I'd use that on DDs friends but I'd certainly tell her friends not to do something that wasn't acceptable here which is what I meant by telling friends off.. I think it's ridiculous that you expect your child to roam free without being told what she can and can't do at a house.
    I replied in your other thread and then deleted it because I just couldnt be bothered, you know when you have one of those moments lol...

    I absolutely would allow someone to tell my DD what she is and isnt allowed to do,I guess my point was if they are going to 'tell her off' to me that is different than just saying 'now now, we don't do that in this house thankyou'.

    That to me is fine, but raising their voice and telling her off, putting DD in timeout or anything along those lines isn't acceptable to me.


 

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