Five years apart or more

**SixtiesChild** · 04-10-2005 11:26

I am due in March and have a five year old little girl who is starting primary school next year. She is so exited about being a big sister and is at an age where she wants to help out a little.
Most of the age gaps I hear of are closer together.
Is there anyone out there with a larger age gap between children?

**ceejay** · 04-10-2005 14:02

Hi there. I've got two boys, just under five years apart. It worked out quite well - it meant the older one was very settled with kinder, etc, when our second was born in January. We've also been able to get him out this year, away from the baby, which has given him some much-needed baby-free time.
Overall, the age gap seems to be fine - although it does mean we've headed back to doing the baby thing after being well out of it. There might be something to be said for a smaller gap but ce la vie.
Also, a friend of mine has just had her second girl and her other daughter is 6 and a half.
all the best.

**Sarie** · 04-10-2005 14:11

I have just under 2 years between my two and at times I find it awfully hard. Nathan still doesn't understand that sometimes I just have to do something with the baby and I can't do what he wants right now.
I think if we were to have another, I would wait for a couple of extra years.

**jackieb76** · 04-10-2005 14:23

Hi,

I have a 6 year old daughter and I am due for my second in February so there will be 6 1/2 years between them.

This was not through choice but because I was single for a while after having my daughter and I have only just come to a stage with this partner (we have been together for 4 years) that we are ready to have a child together.

I think that there are +ve's and -ve's for large gaps between children but I am sure that it is not quite as much work having an older child and a baby. I know for a fact that Ella is very excited and more than ready to help me with the new baby.

There are obviously plenty of advantages of having children close together but there is really nothing that I can do about it now, so I like to think of the positives of having them further apart.

Take care.

**Mummaof2** · 04-10-2005 14:51

Hello,

My daughter turns 5 in December and will be starting kindy next year. My DS EDD is 22/12 (her birthday). My DD is very excited about getting a baby brother and she is also excited about starting big school. I myself believe that 5 years age gap is a good age gap as the older child can understand to some degree when baby needs mummy more then they do for a while. But i also think that you should involve the older child as much as possible when it comes to the baby eg. helping with bathing & dressing etc.

My sister has 2 sons who are 5yrs 1 day apart and even though like all siblings they have their fights they actually get along quite well. On the other hand a friend who has 3 children 8,7 & 2, the first 2 only 13mths apart and they constantly fight between themselves and for their mothers attention and has for the 2yo he was basically brought up by another of her friends as she was always spending time with the first 2 to keep them happy.

**filledebebe** · 04-10-2005 18:47

My first two are four years apart. I have always been really sensitive about the age gap - but am realising that it is not so unusual! Our son was beginning his pre-school year when our daughter was born. They get along very well and he is very helpful. It was a shock going back to baby stage again and I am going to have my second and third closer together - approx 2-2.5 years.

Having said that. I don't think I would change the first age gap. I was at university when i had my first and got through a law degree with number one in tow - I just could not have coped with a second any earlier.

My family has a fifteen year age gap across six children. It is like we are from separate families - however i am the best of friends with my youngest brother (he is 10 years younger than I) and worst enemies with my eldest sister (who is only two years older than I)!!

I think you will really enjoy your time with your second, just as i have done. I also think that there were great benefits for my eldest having four years to himself - although he is a little spoilt!

Good Luck!

**Miss_Vicki** · 04-10-2005 20:33

Ill be in this boat soon , Im due in Feb an My little girl turns 5 In dec this yr , Im, hoping she will be ok with it an Be my little helper (she loves to do it now When she is in the mood)

i Would of rather a Closer gap , but what can u do lol this bub Wasnt planed but yet still very much loved

**aardvark** · 04-10-2005 22:31

My girls will be 15 and 5 in January.

The baby is due at the start of February, so I will have one in high school, one in prep, and a babe in arms.

The teenager is a useful baby sitter from time to time, and the two girls are very close, and enjoy doing things together.

**jasminesmum** · 05-10-2005 09:36

I have 2 boys.One aged 15 and the other aged 7.My little girl is only 5mths old.
I had my older son when I was only 20 and to a different partner.So thats why there was 8 yrs between my sons.My little girl was planned earlier but that did'nt happen.The boys get on really well.They have similar interests and enjoy playing cricket together or the playstation.But they also can fight fairly well.They both adore their new sister and I'm sure she is going to be very spoiled by her big brothers.
I don't think it matters how many years you have between children.Whatever suits you.Everyone is different.

Michelle

**maybe1more** · 05-10-2005 16:48

I have a 27 months old son and tryed to give him a brother or sister so i could have my kid close in age, however god had other plans so by the time i get the all clear to start trying again which is in March next year , my son will probably 4 and a half or older when i finally have bub number two so there will be a bigger gap then i intended but thats life, at least my son will be in kindy or pre school and i can be a home will my my additon if all goes well!