Sian, you are so brave. I am shedding a tear for you
I promise it will get easier. The memories will stay but the pain will get easier to deal with each week that passes by. Let yourself have the time to grieve and do whatever you need to do to cope whether it be vegging in bed with some DVDs or going on a shopping spree, anything to keep you occupied and to get you through.
I am sure your bubba is in your grandad's arms right now.
R.I.P little angel