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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubintummy View Post
    Don't want to start a fight, but this thread makes me sad. Feeling very judged right now as I will have to return to work after PPL. It's not a choice or a 'right' for some people to be a working mum. I would love nothing more than to be a SAHM and
    It breaks my heart knowing that I will have to drop my beautiful DS at daycare while I go to work. We made a decision to have kids when we did, knowing full well that I would have to work, but also knowing that we could put off TTC and nothing would change for us financially anyway. PPL makes it possible for me to have any time off, and the child care rebate will cut us a bit of a break. I know so many other families in the same situation as us, it is not uncommon for families to need 2 earners to meet the ever rising basic costs of living. I think SAHMs are lucky that you get the choice to be at home with your babies.

    Didn't realise people felt like working mums choose to work so should suffer the financial consequences because they should be at home anyway.
    I agree. I find it sad how some PPs have made reference to 'another person raising your child' etc. often working is not a choice! And these sorts of comments only make working mums feel even more guilty.

  2. #32
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    Pretty much what GFP said.

  3. #33
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    I get frustrated by SAHM vs Working Mums discussions. It's just not that clear cut.

    I hate being described as a SAHM - I hate any labels - and prefer to describe myself as someone out of the workforce for an undetermined period of time so that we can have a parent 'available' full time for our kids.

    But I would like to make a few points:

    - I don't understand why nannies aren't already in the childcare rebate model.
    - When I wrote a letter a few years back to the Federal Minister with Superannuation in his portfolio, explaining why it was inequitable that I wasn't eligible for the Super Co-Contribution payment, he wrote me back a wonderful letter telling me that it was because I didn't work in any capacity (those were his exact words).
    - Arguing that working mothers 'deserve' childcare rebates etc because they pay taxes makes no sense. Haven't a large portion of your taxes come back to you in CCB and childcare rebates? Or maybe it does make sense, and I shouldn't have driven on any roads, or had a bulk billed doctors visit today, or sent my son to school today, seeing as how I haven't paid taxes in years.
    - We all make different sacrifices. Financial, time, lifestyle, whatever it may be. I know mums who go to work often feel guilty because they don't spend us much time with their kids. But sometimes I feel like I'm being made to feel guilty (even though I don't feel guilty) because I'm not contributing to the economy to my fullest potential.
    - The economy is not the be all and end all. Never-ending growth isn't possible.
    - By making it easier for women to return to work, it does send a message that it's more important/better that women are at work, and those who don't work are not of value.

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  5. #34
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    I feel alienated as a working mother by this thread. Maybe I'm not 'raising' my children, but I am being an active contributer to society in other ways, like paying taxes.

  6. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by HG98 View Post
    I feel alienated as a working mother by this thread. Maybe I'm not 'raising' my children, but I am being an active contributer to society in other ways, like paying taxes.
    I beg to differ. You are 'raising' your children!

    Anything that is making it supporting Mums surely is a good thing.

    Some people HAVE to work it is not a choice it means the difference between food on the table and their being none.

    Why is it so us and them? It is everywhere. Even now that my children are school aged the working mum vs stay at home mum thing still occurs. Makes me sad!

    How can we raise children to be accepting and supporting of others when we can not even do it amongst ourselves?

  7. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheerilee View Post
    I beg to differ. You are 'raising' your children!

    Anything that is making it supporting Mums surely is a good thing.

    Some people HAVE to work it is not a choice it means the difference between food on the table and their being none.

    Why is it so us and them? It is everywhere. Even now that my children are school aged the working mum vs stay at home mum thing still occurs. Makes me sad!

    How can we raise children to be accepting and supporting of others when we can not even do it amongst ourselves?
    Totally agree. I didn't even realise that it WAS so 'us and them' until reading this thread. Naive much?! Why can't people respect each others choices and respect that every family has a different situation?

  8. #37
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    It's the age old issue that no matter what we do as mothers, it's wrong. You work, you have strangers raising your child and why did you bother having kids to just plonk them in DC 10 hours a day.If you are a SAHM you don't 'contribute' so basically you should be happy with the proverbial scraps you're thrown bc you do nothing anyway.

    I support the nanny scheme. I know if I worked I would feel so much more comfortable leaving every day knowing my kids were in their home with a one-on-one carer. However.... my concern is that only the rich (thus it being a lib initiative ) will be able to afford a nanny, even with a rebate. I haven't looked into nanny prices but given it's 1 on 1 it would have to be $150 a day???

    It sucks so many working mums not only feel crap they are missing out but how this thread has made them feel. Sadly as a SAHM there have been lots of threads here with lots of PA comments that we don't contribute, we have no drive, working mums actually care about their child's financial future (unlike that of a SAHM ). So I understand the feeling of being judged. It sucks

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  10. #38
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    I like this because I want to go back to work and can't because there's a 2 year wait for daycare. My only option at this point to work is to hire in-home care, but it is cost-prohibitive for me.

    I cannot get even a day a week anywhere at this point let alone f/t and about 50% of centres aren't even taking names anymore their lists are so long.

  11. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by deville View Post
    And i don't want to add fuel to the possible fire - but working parents contribute to their super as opposed to someone who doesn't who is going to have to rely on the government pension. I made the conscious choice that I knew my income (for not only NOW but for when I retire) is going to be effected by having children. Even when I return to work if I go back on reduced hours - I sign on knowing that my super contribution will be reflected in my reduced hours.

    I agree - comes down to economics.
    Slightly off topic, and I'm not complaining here, just setting you straight about the comment on non-working parents getting a pension later???

    I am currently a SAHM. I also have money saved from when i worked that I invest and manage and self contribute to my super. With my assets there is no way I will be entitled to receive a government pension. I made a conscious choice too.

  12. #40
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    Without subsised care, working would not have been an option. As a single mum paying for Autism tests, paying for Early Intervention because of no diagnosis at that time, being a SAHM was also not an option. Now I don't need childcare, I don't need any rebates or extra benefits. What would be the point?


 
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