+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 20 FirstFirst 123412 ... LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 191
  1. #11
    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    in a glass case of emotion
    Posts
    12,406
    Thanks
    1,187
    Thanked
    8,045
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    I know not everyone thinks it's a choice I think the majority know sexuality isn't something you choose, it's an innate part of your being.

    I grew up thinking I was straight because that's how I was conditioned to think. Then I went through a period where I considered myself asexual, then I met DP and realised I was never asexual, I was just never attracted to men. I tried - I really did - to make it work with guys. I even went out with one guy who proposed to me, and I seriously considered saying yes because it would have been so much easier than questioning myself even further - but I couldn't because there was nothing there.

    But when you say it in reverse - "heterosexuality is a choice!" it just sounds ridiculous. You can't help who you're attracted to and to suggest a large chunk of the population have chosen a sexuality that will offer a significantly greater number of challenges is just crazy.

    Not to mention that humans are animals. And homosexuality occurs in thousands of species so evolutionary speaking, it's not remarkable at all.

    It upsets me to hear that people think it's okay that I have a gay relationship if I chose to but that since biologically my partner and I can't make a baby, we obviously shouldn't be able to have one and other such nonsense.

    That's all I wanted to say.

  2. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to rainbow road For This Useful Post:

    Gandalf  (26-03-2012),MegaGuts  (28-03-2012),shelle65  (26-03-2012)

  3. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    19,776
    Thanks
    5,212
    Thanked
    7,063
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    I agree with you rainbow. Not many people 'choose' their sexuality whether they be straight or gay. I actually don't believe that many people are 100% dead set hetero, I think there is a lot of fear out there to admit that. I can admit it.

    My BIL is so homophobic to the point where he refuses to allow the tv show Glee to be on in his house. I seriously wonder about him and whether he's overcompensating for some feelings he won't admit. It's pretty extreme. I have no doubt he'd be 10000% against allowing gays to marry, I think it's none of his business which consenting adults marry or not - it has absolutely no affect on his own marriage.

  4. #13
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    ocean shores
    Posts
    2,278
    Thanks
    11
    Thanked
    233
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Oh wow if only it was that easy I'm bi not by choice in any sense thanks to a awsome dh I get to explore this and not live a complete lie.

  5. #14
    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    in a glass case of emotion
    Posts
    12,406
    Thanks
    1,187
    Thanked
    8,045
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    I read a really interesting article when I was studying sexuality in one of my gender/cultural studies classes which suggested that internalised homophobia was the most common type of homophobia there is; people who are same-sex attracted but can't admit to it so exert there frustration towards those who are 'out' and are able to act on it themselves.

    I believe sexuality is continuum and people fall somewhere on the line, some closer toward heterosexuality, some closer to homosexuality and some in the middle (bi). Pretty much the Kinsey scale, actually.

  6. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to rainbow road For This Useful Post:

    delirium  (26-03-2012),MsTruth  (26-03-2012)

  7. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    19,776
    Thanks
    5,212
    Thanked
    7,063
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Yep, that's exactly what I believe too rainbow.

  8. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    10,295
    Thanks
    3,118
    Thanked
    6,305
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    I'm currently getting my hair straightened by my gay hairdresser ( who is a good family friend) reading these threads out to him - he said why on earth would he "choose" a life of discrimination, being bullied at school, being frowned upon by his church, having his parents told to "fix" him, having some family members say they disapprove of his lifestyle , to not be able to marry his boyfriend of 5 years ( yet!)
    If it were a choice he would choose to be straight as life would be easier

  9. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Elijahs Mum For This Useful Post:

    Deserama  (26-03-2012),Gandalf  (26-03-2012),HouseOfFun  (26-03-2012),MegaGuts  (28-03-2012)

  10. #17
    lambjam's Avatar
    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Canberra
    Posts
    7,177
    Thanks
    2,062
    Thanked
    4,956
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Lulu56 View Post
    When I was in my late teens/early 20's there was definitely experimentation but I most assuredly decided it wasn't for me. Would that be choosing to be straight? Or do you consider that "always was straight but was curious"?
    I would say that you "discovered" that it wasn't for you, rather than that you "decided".

    I don't know if anyone actually believes that being gay is a choice; it's pretty clear that we don't choose who we find attractive, however we can choose who we pursue or enter into a relationship with. I've found plenty of men attractive who I knew weren't good for me, so while I couldn't choose whether or not I was attracted to them I could choose not to be with them.

    I suppose it is this logic that people use when they imply that gay people have a choice. No, they can't choose whether they're attracted to a person of the same sex, but they can choose to leave it at that, show incredible self-control and not actually pursue a relationship with them.

    Now, why they would be expected to do that is beyond me...

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to lambjam For This Useful Post:

    Lulu56  (26-03-2012)

  12. #18
    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    in a glass case of emotion
    Posts
    12,406
    Thanks
    1,187
    Thanked
    8,045
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Lulu56 View Post
    I hope this doesn't come out wrong. I'm not looking to stir the pot but I'm hoping for understanding!

    When I was in my late teens/early 20's there was definitely experimentation but I most assuredly decided it wasn't for me. Would that be choosing to be straight? Or do you consider that "always was straight but was curious"?

    I know there are people that believe you "can't" be bisexual. There are others that think you can't be curious about your sexuality either. That it is an entirely black and white issue. No choices and no variations.

    Personally I can't view sexuality in such extreme terms. Just like I couldn't say it's a choice or not for everyone. Human variations are so widespread... it's impossible to say what is one thing for someone is the same for the others.
    I think that'd be the same as me, testing it out with boys but realising it wasn't for me. Not a choice, just a realisation?

    I absolutely think you can be bisexual though - as I believe sexuality is fluid; a continuum where different people fall along it in different places.

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to rainbow road For This Useful Post:

    Lulu56  (26-03-2012)

  14. #19
    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    in a glass case of emotion
    Posts
    12,406
    Thanks
    1,187
    Thanked
    8,045
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Elijahs Mum View Post
    I'm currently getting my hair straightened by my gay hairdresser ( who is a good family friend) reading these threads out to him - he said why on earth would he "choose" a life of discrimination, being bullied at school, being frowned upon by his church, having his parents told to "fix" him, having some family members say they disapprove of his lifestyle , to not be able to marry his boyfriend of 5 years ( yet!)
    If it were a choice he would choose to be straight as life would be easier
    Agreed. It'd definitely be easier to be straight. If it were a choice, I'd choose it. But it's not. I guess I could choose to end my relationship and go out with a man. But then I'd be miserable, and my happiness is not something I'll sacrifice so others feel better about themselves.

  15. #20
    Zombie_eyes's Avatar
    Zombie_eyes is offline Formerly Diamondeyes
    Winner 2012 - Biggest Computer Nerd
    Winner 2013/14 - Funniest Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    9,354
    Thanks
    2,835
    Thanked
    9,033
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Posted a video about this in the other thread... No one gave a toss.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Diet straight after birth?
    By pynk in forum Weightloss & Fitness Challenges
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 03-03-2012, 19:22
  2. TTC straight away - some questions
    By Zoo Baby in forum Pregnancy Loss Support
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 12-01-2012, 21:18

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Fridge-To-Go Australasia
Xmas with a NEW Fridge-to-go Lunch Bag! Fridge-To-Go Australasia
Fridge-to-go 8 hour cooler bags are ideal under the Christmas tree! Now in modern lunch bag designs - fill them with toys and chocolate to make parents and kids happy! Stay super cool and eat healthy and fresh food all summer long!
sales & new stuffsee all
True Fairies
True Fairies is the first interactive website where children can engage and speak with a real fairy through the unique webcam fairy portal. Each session is tailored to the child, and is filled with enchantment and magic.
Visit website to find out more!
featured supporter
GymbaROO
GymbaROO offers activities for babies & toddlers in a fun learning centre, focussing on developmental education. Classes are available Australia-wide. Enrol today & help your child to reach their full potential. Visit the website to find out more.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!