**disclaimer - I'm genuinely interested in different POVs, reasonings etc. I'd love to hear peoples views without the differences in those views being taken as criticism or attack by others, just as I mean no criticism of other parenting style by the sharing my opinions **
Which do you do? Does it work well for you? If you use routines how strict are they? How did you get your children into them?
I do child led/going with the flow style parenting. I attachment parent so maybe it goes with that too. DS1 has a set bedtime (but is read to and cuddled if he wants until he falls asleep), but generally my kids do, and always have, eat when they're hungry, sleep when they're tired, wake when they're done sleeping etc. I get to know their general rhythms and habits and work around that.
DS2 demand feeds (as did DS1) and at times will feed every half hour, other times every few hours.
DS2 will generally have one nap, sometimes two, in his swing per day, otherwise will only sleep when held during the day. So I hold him, as I did with DS1 when he went through that phase.
I also cosleep.
To *me* this seems like the best way to respond to and nurture my children as individuals with individual needs/wants. In my opinion it's better for them to learn to follow their bodies cues for food, rest, play etc rather than external cues by a clock etc.
I should add that if someone put me in a strict routine I'd feel panicky and not enjoy it, so I'm sure that influences my parenting.
It's not always easy, but I don't mind taking my day with a pinch of organized chaos
I have other friends who do routines strictly and that seems to work for them. One friends three children (one being a baby) all go to bed at a set time at night. They are put in their rooms and the doors are closed. The doors are opened at the time they are to wake up. She doesn't use a baby monitor because that's the baby's sleep time so if the baby wakes, well, it shouldn't have.
This friend and another who uses routines can tell me a fortnight (or more) in advance exactly what time their child will nap, what time they will wake and what time they intend to feed them.
Like I said, this works for them and they're very organized people.
For me it boggles my mind.
So share your views and help me understand!