i think i understand where you are comming from. I have a 13mth old who is into everything and anything. Although she does still nap twice a day, whe she is awake it's non stop.
Sometimes i feel like im so focused on my DD the rest of my brain has gone to mush. Sometimes i cant even string 2 sentences together. We are TTc #2 atm and i would like to go back to some part-time study just to get my brain out of baby mode and exercise it a bit. But with DD being so demanding and active when she sleeps, so do i! Im exhausted.
When i reach out to people, i find they are not the support i had hoped for. My mother's groups are full of women i dont naturaly click with and i struggle to talk to them.
I dont have many friends and do feel isolated and lonley alot of the time.
My family live 2hrs away and they r the closest.
I am trying to get out and about to the toddler library sessions, i take DD swimming weekly or so and i'm looking for a playgroup in the time slot she is awake for - but thats hard. I like the idea of gymbaroo but it's too expensive for us.
Im doing all i can to involve myself socially. I think its also important to get DD socially active as well.
I do also find myself counting down the hours untill DH arrives home.
I do enjoy my DD, she is amazing, i love her and she makes me smile every day. She is happy and thriving i'd do anything for her. My life is better since having her in it.
In the end, im so thankfull for having the role as a mummy. There is no greater thing in life. Yes, the road ahead sometimes gets twisted and rocky. But, really, it all comes down to what we have right now, what we have created and what we are nurturing. My baby girl loves me unconditionally, she doesnt care about my "bad days" she doesnt even know i have them! She still smiles and laughs and makes me happy. Im greatful for her and i love her for making me feel like i have a real purpose in life