+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 17
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    93
    Thanks
    9
    Thanked
    11
    Reviews
    0

    Default How do I continue this nightmare?

    This may be long.....I am at a serious point of about to either lose the plot or give up breastfeeding. My DS is 2 weeks old tomorrow and I have not slept more than 2 hours in a 24 hour period, that is 5-10 minutes here and there. He feeds non stop, for over an hour at a time and will stop for 5-10 minutes and then is screaming and acting as if he is starving again.
    I have a 22 month old DD who is really ill at the moment with measles and cries when I am feeding him so basically she cries all day because she needs comfort from me but I'm giving all my attention to the bub. He is gaining weight but never satisfied, I am now falling into a deep depression crying all day and night, I feel sick in the stomach, anxious and I can't for the life of me understand why I ever wanted another baby. I know this sounds terrible as I love him more than anything but I just feel like I can't do this anymore. I want my old life back. I spoke to my GP and he said if I feel the same when bub is 3 weeks to go back and see him.
    I had depression and feeding issues with my DD, she did not attach for the first week and only attached when using a nipple shield. She then had breast refusal and I fed one sided and expressed the other side until she weaned herself at 9 months.
    I really wanted to breastfeed for a minimum of 12 months this time but how can I continue with 1 hours sleep a night. The LC suggested I do a formula top up to see what happens and if there is a difference, he did go for about an hour and it did take only 20 minutes to finish the bottle so I actually had time to cuddle my DD and have a shower. My husband has to work 12 hours a day and we have no choice in the matter and my mum is helping where she can but DD only wants me and DS being breastfed can only have me.
    Has anyone experienced such full on feeding, did it ease? This had been since birth so I know it's not a growth spurt. Thanks and I hope someone can give me some advice on what I can do.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    1,168
    Thanks
    320
    Thanked
    240
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    You poor thing, this must be so hard for you. Breats feeding is an art that both you and bub need to learn. 2 weeks is very early for a bub to 'know' what hes doing. Hang in there, use top up feeds if its working and hopeuflly he will get better soon. Also, watch your diet, there maybe smething in your diet hes not liking?? Just a thought.

    Having said all that if you are feeling (and you said you are) like your falling into a hole and cant see the light, give it up, put him on the bottle. Yes breast feeding is great, but only if your happy!! I started suffering when my bub was 4 months, i should have given up the breast feeding then but i held on for 6 more weeks. I ended up in a really bad place.


    Screw your GP for saying come back in a weeks if its worse...WHY SHOULD WE WAIT FOR IT TO GET WORSE??? Call your child health nurse and have a chat with her. Get her to come to you if you need them to. Call the hospital where you had bub and talk to them. Call your mum and talk to her. PLEASE TALK TO SOMEONE!!!

    IM so sorry your going throught this. Take care and good luck

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to jennibear For This Useful Post:

    Guest654  (17-03-2012)

  4. #3
    headoverfeet's Avatar
    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    18,954
    Thanks
    3,142
    Thanked
    4,892
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Is there the chance that you could go stay with your Mum for a few days? It's normal for a baby to feed frequently within the first 6-8 weeks, it does pass to me it sounds like you need more hands on support, if that means all you focus on is being with your children while others do the rest then so be it. Will babe settle in a wrap on you after a feed? Maybe that's something you could try.

    Sorry I also wanted to say, I experience depression when I am not sleeping enough, is co sleeping something you could safely do at the moment to catch up? I can't remember exactly what you wrote in you op about when your partner is going back to work but could he keep an eye on you while you and babe caught up on some Zzz?
    Last edited by headoverfeet; 17-03-2012 at 17:00.

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    6,372
    Thanks
    422
    Thanked
    1,168
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    That does sound nightmareish. You have breastfed for two weeks which is great. I think you need to speak to a proffessional, perhaps your child health nurse to begin with. Some suggestions for the feeding.. Do you think its comfort sucking and have you tried a dummy? Do you think there is any pain ? If he is gaining weight it seems he isn't starving.. So formula may not help, but I don't know. Only a lactation consultant would probably know.. It would help in the sense somebody else can help with feeding.. And I completely see the benefit in that. I have been through some really bad times with my kids, where one was really sick, or both.. And you just don't have the ability to do it all.. But nobody to help. I would generally set up a mattress in the lounge, some toys, some colouring books.. Pillows, snacks and DVDs.. And plonk myself and the kids there and try to get through it. You seem very unhappy and stressed and I think you should definitely see about receiving some extra support. I don't know any numbers off the top of my head but your child health nurse might.

    Sent from my BlackBerry 9100 using Tapatalk

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    213
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    29
    Reviews
    0
    It sounds so awful what you're going through at the moment. I think you just have to do what's best for you and bub and if that's giving them some formula to give everyone some rest then maybe that's best. My sister had PND and tried so hard to breastfeed and her boy was such an unsettled baby who cried constantly and in the end it was because he was so hungry.
    I think it's great that you want to breastfeed your bubba but sometimes things don't go as planned. And don't beat yourself up if you do go to formula. My nephew who only ever had formula is an intelligent, strong and healthy boy.
    I hope things get better for you no matter what path you decide to take.

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    108
    Thanks
    16
    Thanked
    159
    Reviews
    0
    If you want to maintain your breastfeeding relationship, my advice would be to NOT top up with formula. Babies are fickle little creatures and get confused easily. There will be a risk of breast refusal if you offer anything else.

    Sleep deprivation is a b@stard of a thing, though And to deal with that, the baby blues AND measles?! You poor thing! Rally around some support. Get friends and family around you and ask them to help in any which way they can - cooking, cleaning, changing nappies - whatever. Sleep whenever you can grab a minute while others mind the kids.

    Get a sling and learn to attach the littlest one while he is in the sling so you aren't completely immobile when you are feeding him.

    And co-sleep. During the night, when he is feeding, throw a nipple in his mouth and close your eyes and drift. You will feel better for it.

    This will pass. I promise you that everything will get better. You're so so close to the magical 3 week mark where everything just. gets. better. And 3 weeks from there, everything is easy! You can do it! We believe in you! Just be kind to yourself and accept any help that is offered.

    All the best

  8. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    321
    Thanks
    23
    Thanked
    51
    Reviews
    0
    I have a two week old. I mix feed and it lets me get some sleep at night. There is nothing evil about topping up with formula.

    As for the whole situation, BIG HUGs I have no advice but i hope it gets better really soon for you.

  9. #8
    headoverfeet's Avatar
    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    18,954
    Thanks
    3,142
    Thanked
    4,892
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by Speedy View Post
    If you want to maintain your breastfeeding relationship, my advice would be to NOT top up with formula. Babies are fickle little creatures and get confused easily. There will be a risk of breast refusal if you offer anything else.

    Sleep deprivation is a b@stard of a thing, though And to deal with that, the baby blues AND measles?! You poor thing! Rally around some support. Get friends and family around you and ask them to help in any which way they can - cooking, cleaning, changing nappies - whatever. Sleep whenever you can grab a minute while others mind the kids.

    Get a sling and learn to attach the littlest one while he is in the sling so you aren't completely immobile when you are feeding him.

    And co-sleep. During the night, when he is feeding, throw a nipple in his mouth and close your eyes and drift. You will feel better for it.

    This will pass. I promise you that everything will get better. You're so so close to the magical 3 week mark where everything just. gets. better. And 3 weeks from there, everything is easy! You can do it! We believe in you! Just be kind to yourself and accept any help that is offered.

    All the best
    This

  10. #9
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    721
    Thanks
    38
    Thanked
    134
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    If you really do need to top up, even if temporarily, try tube feeding on your finger or google an SNS - your LC or Mach nurse should be able to help with those. The SNS saved my bf relationship with both of my kids.

    If he's putting on weight then I would be seeking medical opinions on things like reflux, tongue tie, general tummy problems.

    It sounds like you're having a really tough time. I encourage you to talk it through with people and be really kind to yourself. No one expects miracles of you and you shouldn't either. Do what it takes to get through this time and keep reminding yourself that this too shall pass.

  11. #10
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    271
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked
    31
    Reviews
    4
    You can always ring the Australian Breastfeeding Association for help. They have a 24 hour number you can ring and I found them very supportive when I had to ring them at 3 in the morning in tears! Things also got better for me at 3 weeks, (although I don't have any other kids to worry about). Just do whatever you feel is right for you and your baby. Good luck


 

Similar Threads

  1. Would you continue your pregnancy if...?
    By chickenandfrog in forum Social Issues
    Replies: 162
    Last Post: 14-03-2015, 09:53
  2. Should I continue to help this friend?
    By penniless in forum General Chat
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 30-06-2012, 09:30
  3. Should I continue?
    By stretch in forum Constipation, Toilet Training
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 27-04-2012, 21:09

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Shapland Swim Schools
Shapland's at participating schools offer free baby orientation classes once a month - no cost no catches. Your baby will be introduced to our "natural effects" orientation program develop by Shapland's over 3 generations, its gentle and enjoyable.
sales & new stuffsee all
Bub Hub Sales Listing
HAVING A SALE? Let parents know about it with a Bub Hub Sales listing. Listings are featured on our well trafficked Sales Page + selected randomly to appear on EVERY page
featured supporter
TPS Health Physiotherapy and Pilates
TPS Health Physiotherapy and Pilates has three clinics located at Morningside, Redlands and Lutwyche. We offer pre and post natal services as well as physiotherapy and Pilates. All clinics offer child minding services so bubs are always welcome!
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!