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  1. #21
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    Only time will tell I hope I'm lucky that way that she doesnt end up spoilt, yeah it's only 2 weeks btwn bday and Christmas for us, I'm just realizing I'm in control of my child these small things I do can define the person she will become even though I'm doing it out of love!
    I have decided to set up a savings account for her and deposit money into it instead! Wish me luck haha!

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    Maybe instead of focusing on the "stuff" you didn't have when you were a kid, and trying to make up for that now, you could focus on the good things about your childhood and try to give that to your DD. We didn't have much money growing up either but to me all that meant was we appreciated birthdays/Christmas all the more, we knew we couldn't have everything we wanted, and we used our imaginations! So maybe you could think about those good parts of your childhood instead?

    I can see how easy it would be to fall into the trap of buying lots for your first child especially. We bought our (unborn) bub a soft toy while we were on holidays a few weeks ago - it was the first thing we bought - and as soon as we had we said to each other "That's it, no more presents" but it was so tempting to keep going You & your DH need to support each other to make the right decision! Good luck.

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    AllYouNeedIsLove  (14-03-2012)

  5. #23
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    i did this to an extent with my first too. i found once she had waaaaay too much stuff and had outgrown lots yet was still an only child so not much point keeping anything and no storage room it started to sink in to me. i think she must have been 3 ior 4yo when i finally accepted getting rid of stuff. throwing all those things that i obey hadn't gotten enough use churned my stomach up. i still remember bagging things thinking 50,20,80,45,15,50 etc all the dollars amounts wasted on things barely used. i stopped doing it then and im glad for it as she is 14now and is lovely generous and not materialistic in the slightest. i shudder to imagine the person she might have been otherwise.

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  6. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beez1st View Post
    Only time will tell I hope I'm lucky that way that she doesnt end up spoilt, yeah it's only 2 weeks btwn bday and Christmas for us, I'm just realizing I'm in control of my child these small things I do can define the person she will become even though I'm doing it out of love!
    I have decided to set up a savings account for her and deposit money into it instead! Wish me luck haha!
    I have taught ds about the value of money and made him appreciate what he gets. In the early years I would splurge as wanted him to have everything, I'm not half as bad now but I still spoil him but he has to earn the things he gets by doing his chores, being good etc.

  7. #25
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    Why don't you put the money aside each week/fortnight and have a fabulous family holiday at the end of the year? Or bank it for her future? I can't imagine what I'd even buy for $200 a week every week for my two!

  8. #26
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    Spoil her rotten with love and joy.

    She doesn't care about DVD players and all that guff - she wants you to play with her and to tickle her and blow raspberries on her tummy. Take her to see everything - spend time with her.

    When she is 5, she won't remember that expensive dress or those toys. But she will feel all that love in her heart.

  9. #27
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    We did'nt have much rowing up as kids, a balloon in a plastic bag tied to a piece of string and used as a kite was awesome fun!
    I don't feel I ever missed out o anything growing up tho... are you sure there are not other emotional issues for your burried further down, such as missing out on love and affection that you've mistaken for "things"?
    I think it's a common thing, my hubby had a terrible childhood and both of his parents, although separated, moved away with new partners when he was 14 and left him on his own without the option to join either, and he LOVES his "things".

  10. #28
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    We buy DD a LOT of 'stuff'. A lot of her toys are bought because I like them. I never had barbies as a kid, never had much of anything, so now I get to play with beautiful dolls houses and every barbie under the sun. I don't think DD is spoilt.
    I think if she ever stopped appreciating what she had we would stop doing it, but she is thankful and really shows appreciation for everything she gets, whether it's a $2 or a new wendy house.

    So I wouldnt stop what you are doing unless your DD begins to shows signs that she expects it and throws a tanty say, when she doesnt get the latest toy.


 

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