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  1. #1
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    Default Rude? or am I overreacting?

    I'm not sure if anyone else has the same thoughts, but I find it rude when people bring up their special events that are coming up at someone elses special event. As if to outshine the current special occasion.

    When my DH and I were engaged, we made a point, even if people asked us, we never discussed what the plans were for our wedding at our firends/families weddings/events, or handed out invites/details about our wedding. We never wanted to try and take the lime light away from the people that the gathering was for.

    Sorry its a long post, but wanted to explain my train of thought.

    So today at a family event which was a big surprise birthday celebration, SIL-to-be handed everyone wedding invites just after we arrived with MIL who was the birthday person.

    When she handed the invite to me for DH and I, I said that they should have waited to hand them out, and she responded with, oh it doesn't matter.

    The invites all had address labels and things, so why they couldn't have been posted, or handed to the people individually I'm not sure... Even waiting till the end of the lunch would have been better. FIL thought it was tastless too...

    So am I overreacting? Has anyone ever felt the same and how did you deal with it?

  2. #2
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    Meh some people are like that. I think it's rude.

    I sent all my wedding invitations in the mail, even my parents and friends I see regularly.

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    I sent mine in post. It was more exciting to receive in mail and also the correct etiquette. Even mailed the invite to the person who made them for us!!!
    Some people don't think of these things.

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    I agree. I think it's good manners to avoid stepping on anyone's toes at their own special event, and I would have posted them separately.

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    Yeah I think it's a bit rude if it's a big celebration. Not so much if it's just a quiet birthday dinner or something.

    That said, my brother is getting married on DD's 5th birthday later this month - if people don't make a big deal out of her being the birthday girl at the wedding she will be devastated (and I will be livid)..

  6. #6
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    Yes, it's rude. Though not many people seem to consider proper etiquette these days I find.. The invitations should have been posted but if they HAD to hand them out, they should have quietly slipped them to people as they were leaving.

    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    Yeah I think it's a bit rude if it's a big celebration. Not so much if it's just a quiet birthday dinner or something.

    That said, my brother is getting married on DD's 5th birthday later this month - if people don't make a big deal out of her being the birthday girl at the wedding she will be devastated (and I will be livid)..
    Poor kid, I wouldn't have been too thrilled spending my bday at a wedding at that age! If they haven't already organised it , can you ask your brother if you could bring along a cake for her and have it brought it with candles during the reception so everyone can sing happy birthday? I hope they make a fuss of her!

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    Just thought I'd add that I think it's EXTREMELY rude to hand out invitations in front of others who aren't invited to your event. It's happened to me before and it's so awkward and embarrassing to be the one that misses out. So hopefully everyone there was getting an invite!!!

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    Yeah I think it's rude too but she probably didn't realise and was too wrapt up in her own event or maybe she just got excited and wanted to hand them out in person and thought while everyone is together...

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    Thanks for your replies!
    Yes I guess she may not have seen my point because of her excitement, but the wedding is at the end of 2013... It coul have waited, even Easter would have been a nicer timing.
    Not everyone at the lunch is invited to their wedding...

    I wonder if she'd mind me announcing our pregnancy at her wedding haha... Just kidding!! I'm not like that lol

    Although we could be - that's our plan to start trying just before their wedding...

  10. #10
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    I agree, your SIL was rude.

    A girl (19ish) at work, last year and this year organised her birthday and spoke about her plans in front of many people but only inviting a few from work. If I was going to have a party, I wouldnt bring it up in front of un-invited people unless they asked "what are you doing for your birthday". But this girl just goes on and on about it when no one evens asks her! Its so awkward!!


 

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