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  1. #11
    Eko's Avatar
    Eko is offline Acrobatic Dominatrix.
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    Sounds like she's cracked. My DS couldn't say any more than about 10 words at 2 years old. Now he never (affectionately said of course!) shuts up!
    Every child is different, and that doesn't make you a bad mum. As for TV, kids learn from EVERYthing. It doesn't hurt them to have a little educational background noise as they go through their day, I used to leave it on when DS was little for that very reason. It wasn't his focus, but it was there to jog his memory every now and then.
    I used to play Playschool cds for the same reason, so that he could learn nursery rhymes, abcs and numbers without me having to feel like a broken record constantly singing them.
    There's no substitute for good parenting, but I don't see how having the telly on in the background while you're getting them ready etc. in the morning makes you a BAD parent!

    I don't think you should feel bad at all. Some nurses just feel like they have to make you feel bad or they aren't doing their job! Sounds like she was one of them.

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    She sounds like a horrible fool. Complain! That's very rude of her and extremely untrue about your DDs talking.

    My DD is the only child I have met to have known hundreds or words at 18 months. But nearly every other child I met only knew a handful.

    A child will talk/walk/crawl/jump/sing when they are ready!!!! And there is not a great deal any parent can do to change that.

    I'm really sorry your CHN is an idiot, mine was too.

  3. #13
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    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    Hi, just thought I'd throw in my 2 cents; I am a child care worker and worked in a toddler room, ages 18 months - 2 years.. there is NO WAY any of these toddlers had a vocab of 50 plus words. That does not mean that they were behind in any way; most if not all of them were very smart, they understood instructions, displayed clear intelligence, they just were not able to verbalise yet. They know what they want to say, they just haven't mastered speech at that age. An example that happened daily was when one child took away ones toy, they would come up to me and tug and point, whinge and cry- they wanted to tell me "hey, that kid over there just stole my toy!" but at that age- impossible. It's amazing though how after they reach around 2.5 - 3 years how fast their vocab expands.
    I agree with a pp, if you're unhappy and coming away feeling 2 feet tall as a mum, see another nurse.

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to ~Marigold~ For This Useful Post:

    Ulysses  (29-02-2012)

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    Quote Originally Posted by 2Bboys View Post
    You definitely don't sound like a bad mother to me!

    My DS is 2.5 and he'd only just be hitting the 50 word mark recently.

    Please don't let it get you down. I learnt the hard way with DS1 about not listening to child health nurses.

    At DS2s four week check my CHN casually mentioned randomly that as he was slightly pulling his head to the side that it could be a tumour. A tumour! What sort of thing is that to mention in passing to a mother of a newborn. I'm glad i knew better not to pay too much attention to her.

    Take your DD to the GP for a 2nd check if it will make you feel better.

    Hugs
    I'm sorry to laugh but all I can picture is Arnie in Kindergarden Cop saying 'Its not a tumour'!!!! How ridiculous is she!!!

  6. #15
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    WHAT! 50 words by 18months! Thats crap. I'd be a bad mum then. My DD1 didnt even say mum till she was 1. She was slow to talk. But the first to walk.
    You are not a bad mum at all. And its not because of tv either. Every child learns things at their own pace. These people need a knock on the head for making you feel cr@ppy and coming up with such dumb averages.

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    Some Maternal nurses are idiots. I nearly started a post last week cause at my DS appointment the lady said he had too many words/sentences for his age and it would stunt his social development because people would expect him to be older than he was and he might not respond maturely enough? Honestly I get the sense unless they can advise or pick up an 'issue' for the child they don't feel like they are doing their job properly.

  8. #17
    Ulysses's Avatar
    Ulysses is offline In the eyes of a child you will see...the world as it should be.
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    my DD is 20 months & doesn't say any meaningful words. She communicates in other ways & has lots of funny little words but nothing that sounds the way it should.

    Your daughter sounds perfectly fine.

    As for your anxiety, that is totally up to you wether you "do" something about it or not….how dare she talk to you like that. As if you need someone judging you & putting you down when you are openly telling them you are feeling insecure. I would definitely complain about her.

    As for television, I would like to see how many kids never watch it? The latest research switches the panic button off & indicates that it is not a real issue providing the child is still receiving adequate cognitive stimulation outside of television time. I think recent studies show an average of three hours of tv per day for most kids.

    Ignore this womans comments, complain about her attitude & tell yourself you are a great mum & give yourself a big pat on the back for refraining from punching this woman in the face.

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    At my Ds 18month old MCH app, our lovely nurse asked the same question. "how many words?"....my reply was "does Ta Ta count as two!?". Seriously. He had Ta Ta, that's it. He is now 2.5 and does have a mild delay but speechie said don't worry about therapy until 3 if I want to wait and see.

    I think your nurse sounds like an insensitive cow!

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using BubHub

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    Well I can blow that theory out of the water(not sure if that's the correct expression!) my dd 19 months can say 50 words prob more and watches way too much tv. I feel like a crap mum. So eat that stupid nurse!

    What I'm trying to get at and not putting eloquently is that no matter what we do how hard we try or don't try we will still have moments or extended periods where we doubt our parenting abilities. The nurse should be providing some support for mums not planting seeds of doubt.
    Last edited by Carpe diem 2013; 29-02-2012 at 21:15.

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    I have walked out of a couple of MCN appointments in tears because i thought i was doing something wrong or my DS1 wasn't "normal", compared to their book.

    What a load of cr#p.

    No child every milestone to the book. Please dont worry about not saying 50 words by 18 months.

    My DS1 was only saying "mummy" at 3 years old, now at 4.5 years he can talk my arm off. That is with alot of intervention from the public health system.

    Dont stress it will all work out and as long as your child is happy and healthy that is all that matters.


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    Carpe diem 2013  (29-02-2012)


 

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