sonja: i kinda feel he needs to go and talk about his own issues first initially (that include work stress and his alcohol use and whatever parenting / pressures / personal issues he has) unfortunately given the "texts" ive been receiving today my DH thinks his binge drinking is "justified" by his "working hard" and "pulling his weight with H".....he doesnt think its a problem. he just doesnt get it , he doesnt understand that pulling your weight with a child means being emotionally available too (not lying on the lounge looking bored cos u are hungover on the one and only day u dont work and can actually spend some decent time with them)....i dont know..he just is not on the same page and im not willing to compromise ie there is nothing that justifies getting blind drunk which is what he does, he seems to think there is and thats its "ok". i feel it will only get worse with me "being at home and doing nothing" now...hence he "works" and i will be doing "nothing"...well that was his attitude last time. he doesnt have the benefit of having expereinced both situations whcih i know and know that being a SAHM is way harder than working 9-5....plus i dont even know if i want to do marraige cousnelling, i feel like im talking to the town idiot when i try to get my point across to him for the 100th time ie its not the going out per se, its the severely excessive boozing and the state he is in the next day thats the problem and that he cant seem to go out and control his drinking so how does he expect to keep going out and for me to just ....accept it. blah.