Parents of spirited children, chat and support thread.

**nerdgirl99** · 22-02-2012 12:38

Pick me! DD is just ridiculous sometimes. I thought perhaps I was just soft but my mother, who has had four kids of her own, has confirmed that she is definitely more 'full on' than usual. Her swimming teacher has commented that 'she certainly has character' and other people often watch in disbelief about her energy levels.

I knew from watching my stomach move when I was pregnant that I'd have a 'spirited' child. I thought I may be having an alien the way it moved around. She's only teeny tiny, not yet 9kg at 17 months, but a health nurse said not to worry - she just doesn't stop moving so she burns it all off.

She rolled at 3 months, crawled at 7 months, walked... And ran by 11 months (literally stopped crawling one day and walked the next).

Our latest thing is climbing. Climbing and then jumping. Either on the object or off it - she's not fussy. Climbing toy boxes, over the couch, any chair that's left out, kitchen table, up her high chair - you name it. I literally panic when she's quiet because i know she is somewhere she shouldn't be.

Friends just don't understand. They don't realise that I can't leave her at night because she just won't settle for my DP when she wakes up (and she almost always wakes up). And on the odd occasion I do go out and someone else puts her to bed, I can guarantee that she will have an awful night's sleep - keeping me up with her. I can't go to a coffee shop because sitting in the high chair is like torture for her.

She sleeps barely an hour during the day and has never been a good sleeper.

That said she is incredibly smart, saying three word sentences already. She understands almost everything we say to her and she loves reading her books. She is outgoing and social and very gentle with other children and pets (her toys - not so much). I love her to bits and being spirited is so much of who she is and wouldn't have her any other way!

Phew. I needed to get that out it seems. Love the idea for a thread and will watch with interest for advice and support!

**breakthemould** · 22-02-2012 12:46

Originally Posted by nerdgirl99

Pick me! DD is just ridiculous sometimes. I thought perhaps I was just soft but my mother, who has had four kids of her own, has confirmed that she is definitely more 'full on' than usual. Her swimming teacher has commented that 'she certainly has character' and other people often watch in disbelief about her energy levels.

I knew from watching my stomach move when I was pregnant that I'd have a 'spirited' child. I thought I may be having an alien the way it moved around. She's only teeny tiny, not yet 9kg at 17 months, but a health nurse said not to worry - she just doesn't stop moving so she burns it all off.

She rolled at 3 months, crawled at 7 months, walked... And ran by 11 months (literally stopped crawling one day and walked the next).

Our latest thing is climbing. Climbing and then jumping. Either on the object or off it - she's not fussy. Climbing toy boxes, over the couch, any chair that's left out, kitchen table, up her high chair - you name it. I literally panic when she's quiet because i know she is somewhere she shouldn't be.

Friends just don't understand. They don't realise that I can't leave her at night because she just won't settle for my DP when she wakes up (and she almost always wakes up). And on the odd occasion I do go out and someone else puts her to bed, I can guarantee that she will have an awful night's sleep - keeping me up with her. I can't go to a coffee shop because sitting in the high chair is like torture for her.

She sleeps barely an hour during the day and has never been a good sleeper.

That said she is incredibly smart, saying three word sentences already. She understands almost everything we say to her and she loves reading her books. She is outgoing and social and very gentle with other children and pets (her toys - not so much). I love her to bits and being spirited is so much of who she is and wouldn't have her any other way!

Phew. I needed to get that out it seems. Love the idea for a thread and will watch with interest for advice and support!

So many things you said ppl say about your DD is the same for us! "character" is a common one! "full on" is another. My DS seems to have no fear of jumping either. He will stand on the dining table and say 'big jump?' whilst bending his knees to get ready.

I often catch myself letting him do things that other parents wouldn't let their child doing, because its the best of a bad bunch of things! Like kicking a balloon around a medicare office over all the seated waiting ppls heads, tearing around the whole room, climbing under desks to get it, chasing it between the seats. Its better that he does this than have a massive crying, yelling, hitting, shouting at anyone who looks at him GO AWAY, tantrum if I take the balloon away. Thank god that when I finally got to the counter that day the lady serving me whispered to me that he reminded her of her grandson so much and not to worry about the noise and chaos he was creating if he was happy!

How do our defiant, self control lacking children go at school mums with older kids?

**Beachside Mumma** · 22-02-2012 12:50

Originally Posted by Thermolicious

Why can't I confidently take them out to have coffee with a friend, they can't even sit still for 5 min. This afternoon I have to take DS1 to the doctors and I'm dreading it, the wait in the surgery the constant keeping them in check in an unsuitable environment, the looks from other people, juggling to stop them grabbing everything in the room while trying to have a conversation with the doctor

Don't get me started on the lack of family support

I wish I would just pick up the phone and ask my mum to watch Dad and DS2 while I take DS1.

This bit totally got me. DD1 is my spirited child and I honestly dread taking her anywhere. Some days she's an angel when we go out, but they're very few and far between. Most times I know I'm going to leave where ever it is extremely frustrated and feeling like I'm going to burst into tears.

Today's a bad day here - I'm trying to pack the house up to move, clean before we go to perth this afternoon and she's into everything. And we've had some pretty spectacular meltdowns already. It's not even midday and I already feel completely exhausted.

**nerdgirl99** · 22-02-2012 12:51

Originally Posted by breakthemould

I often catch myself letting him do things that other parents wouldn't let their child doing, because its the best of a bad bunch of things! Like kicking a balloon around a medicare office over all the seated waiting ppls heads, tearing around the whole room, climbing under desks to get it, chasing it between the seats. Its better that he does this than have a massive crying, yelling, hitting, shouting at anyone who looks at him GO AWAY, tantrum if I take the balloon away. Thank god that when I finally got to the counter that day the lady serving me whispered to me that he reminded her of her grandson so much and not to worry about the noise and chaos he was creating if he was happy!

I so do this too! I am so paranoid people think I'm a terrible parent for letting her do 'dangerous' things but if it doesn't look like she's going to hurt herself or someone else I just let her go. I know her capabilities and limitations so if I know she can confidently climb up on the chair in a waiting room or jump off a step I just let her go.

**shelle65** · 22-02-2012 13:18

DD is nearly 5 and I also get the comments on how much character she has, how tough and confident she is... Which I agree are good attributes but they bring so many tiring and difficult things with them. Every time I pick her up from her Dad's or grandma's I think *sigh* "here we go..." And then I feel guilty for not being thrilled to see her.

**HELPihavea2yrold!** · 22-02-2012 13:30

I have a very full on toddler! Whenever we go to doctor, they always say 'um, your child is very........ Spirited'. Don't know if they mean it in a good or bad way yet :-)
He is starting testing for ASD in the next few months though so might be able to find out what's going on with him

**eviezmum** · 22-02-2012 14:44

Oh wow... I have not heard the term before, but I think I have a spirited child! Each and every one of you could have just been describing my little hell raiser!! My friends don't understand how I am so exhausted at the end of the day. I'm going to have to read that book!! She certainly is special though and I get the feeling that life will never be dull now that she's here!

**waterlily** · 22-02-2012 15:45

Originally Posted by Thermolicious

my children don't eat preservatives, nasty additives nor too much sugar, DS2 never has and DS1 hasn't since he was 18 months. Spirited is simply spirited!

Hahaha it has stopped the "spirited" part just the melt downs as I mentioned