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  1. #1
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    Default Playing with fire? Or not?

    Hi, this kinda belongs in this catorgory and kinda does not, its a tricky topic, hubby and i have been married for two months now, and I have been teaching for 3 weeks, I want to work my career and hubby wants to save some money. Problem is we are both really clucky and although we don't technically want a baby yet our use of contraception is getting poorer and poorer.

    We kinda have this back ground idea I guess that if God wants us to have a baby earlier then our plan He will make it happen or not.

    So I want to know if we are being very risky and what is my chances of an accidental pregnancy.

    I am tracking my cycle extendind the fertile time buy about 3 days each side and In the fertile period we often do not use a condom at the start and then about half way through start using one.

    What do you think my chances are of falling pregnant?

  2. #2
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    Sperm can survive for 5 or so days in fertile CM so your chances are high but it all depends on when you ovulate and how close to that you are having unprotected sex (assuming you are healthy in every way). TBH I think you both really want it and it is fine to take a relaxed approach and let nature take it's course. However, you should go and have some preconception checks and start on PC vitamins and ensure you really are ready for this if you are going to do it this way as there are certain things you need to have in place to give bubs and yourself the best pg and birth. If you truly aren't ready though then I would go back to using the contraception properly. Perhaps you and your DH need to have a discussion about what you are doing and whether you are truly happy to throw caution to the wind. Wishing you all the best, whatever happens.

  3. #3
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    Eko is offline Acrobatic Dominatrix.
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    Yep. Playing with fire. *chuckle*. If you don't technically want a baby yet, then stop technically trying for one. You know when you're fertile period is and are not using contraception. Stop fooling yourself, you want a baby, your hubby wants a baby... So make a baby!
    It sounds like I'm being harsh I'm sure, but I have the biggest grin on my face right now because I could have written that post a couple if months ago, and dh and I have decided to ttc #2 next month It can be hard to make that cognitive decision to ttc, but when you do you get to start getting excited about it rather than feeling a little guilty hahaha.

    I agree with the PP. Start taking preconception vitamins if you aren't already. It's recommended to take folate for at least a month beforehand, and it gives some time to build it up in your system.
    It also gives you some time to save a little cash if you haven't got any laid aside yet. We thought the baby bonus would help us to buy the big ticket things but it really ended up just being weekly income because I wasn't working.

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    laurea  (19-02-2012)

  5. #4
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    Cool You are right.

    We are not really trying to conceive..but if I did fall pregnant we would not be sad, we have only been married two months, I studied for so long to get a job as a teacher, I feel as though to fall pregnant and not be able to complete at least one year teaching would make me not as easily employable in the future when I did return to work.

    I am juggling the decisions between career and money vs baby and biological clock ticking at this point.

    I am taking a really good practitioner only multivitamin when I remember, and I have been off the pill for a year to learn to track my cycle and learn charting. There is a small chance I think of falling pregnant with the withdrawal method..it would be easier if I did just fall preggo with out planning it because then the decision of the timing for babies would be made.

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    Sweetpez - I'm exactly the same in that I just finished a post grad in teaching last year and I'm currently doing relief work hoping for an FTC this year. But I am planning on us starting TTC in May whatever happens because there is never a right time. You will always be employable and any experience you get this year will be valuable and the same applies for money saved. TBH a career doesn't matter so much the older you get and you start to realise that you will get work somehow because others have done it and survived. As long as your OH is in a good stable job then at least there will always be money coming in. I think that if you are "playing with fire" as you so put it now then really you have made up your mind even if you are taking a lax approach to it. Just go for it or make an actual plan to start in another few months. You don't have to be full on about TTC but you do need to make an active decision because there is a lot to think about and put in place. Best wishes.


 

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