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  1. #1
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    Default Book Recommendations/ General advice?

    Hi Hubbers,

    I need help! I have an 18 month old DS who is pushing every boundary and then some. He is extremely cheeky, hyper, full of energy, never stops moving etc etc. He is REALLY rough. He smacks, , bites and everything in between. He does most of this in excitement (which is all the time) He does throw the occasional tantrum but not really very often. He never acts out in frustration on anger he is just stoaked with life and loves playing with people and doesn't yet understand appropriate ways to express his love. haha.
    He can be calm at times. He is remarkable at sleep times, he can be totally hyper but if I put him in his cot and walk out the room he will go to sleep. He won't sleep unless he is totally on his own though. He has been that way since he was 6 weeks old.

    My husband have tried removing him from an environment, talking calmly with him, I have yelled once or twice (which I wish not to do, but some days it's a bit much), redirecting his attention. None of which has had any effect.

    We are not really consistent with our approach to this behavior and we really need help. We have no idea what we're doing and DS knows it!

    DH has told him off with a firm voice a few times, DS was having nappy free time during one of these occasions and we actually saw him wet himself laughing...

    Has anyone read any AWESOME books with tips on dealing with toddlers? Or have any advice? I can honestly only see things getting far worse and I have no desire to have this behavior get any further out of control.


    For the record- We are aware a lot of this is normal toddler stuff and I totally expect him to be a little out of control at times. We are after suggestions on how we can act to help him learn socially acceptable ways of behaving. We are not really open to smacking him or yelling at him in an aggressive tone.

  2. #2
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    Are some of the behaviors due to boredom maybe?
    Could you set up activities to keep him more occupied, some quiet things like books & puzzles, and also physical activity things like playing with balls/bikes/jumping on trampoline

    In regards to the rough/smack/bite behavior, we use time out for our DS. No yelling or getting angry, just time to sit for a minute and think about what happened, when the time is over a quick explanation about what happened and then move on to something else.

    I think the most important thing is you & your DH been consistent, it can be confusing for everyone (mainly the children) when your not all on the "same page" iykwim Good luck

    * Just wanted to add a favourite book of mine is "Raising Boys" by Steve Biddulph
    Last edited by MummyNanny; 12-02-2012 at 20:04. Reason: Add last line

  3. #3
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    bambino is offline Autistic Today, My Genius Tomorrow
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    1 2 3 Parent Magic.

    There is a book and you can sign up for their newsletter emails that have info each issue.

    But I also agree with pp. Consistency is a major key. If you want to try one technique, keep using the same one. But then if that doesn't work, then you just need to find something else that does - not all kids are the same or react in the same way.
    The naughty chair never worked for us. The time out or thinking corner didn't work either. In the end it was quite time in his room. His room has no toys in their either so when he did go to his room, all he could do was sit there. Then after 5 minutes of quite time, we would talk about what he did and why it's wrong to do it....someone could get hurt, it's not nice etc....

    It's hard, but there is light at the end of the tunnel.

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    I totally agree with being consistent. We have tried a few things consistently but they stop working. Ie- he would bite me, say 'no' to himself and then trot off to his 'quiet spot' then laugh. So we stopped using that technique when he used it in himself! I will check out the above suggestions, I need ides to be consistent with haha.

    As for him being bored- I don't think so. He spends one day a week at day care, we do swimming, music, and have a million activities at home. I used to be a nanny and work in childcare so entertaining him is easy, I just never had to deal with behaviors like this all day every day before! Haha. He is a little wilder than I have worked with in the past!!

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    I think Pinky McKay has a toddler book which covers the types of things you mention in your post. I've not read it myself (yet), just the baby stuff which has been very good.

    Supernanny is also very popular in the UK.

    Good Luck.

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    Ohhh I love pinky! I didn't know she had a toddler book, thanks!


 

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