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  1. #1
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    Default Need advice - I'm speechless

    Warning, this will be long...

    So as some may have read my ex broke up with me 5 weeks ago on my 30th birthday after accusing me of being a selfish materialistic bish cause I got upset that the most he did was send me a text message at lunch time, although spending the day with me in bed he did not say a thing, did not even touch me, then 10 minutes before dinner he let lose and stormed out

    Things starting going bad between us in November when he 'accidentally' gave me the coldsore virus, down there, on a night I was coming down with DDs chest infection and kept saying no, unfortunately he was not of straight mind at the time so didn't care that I said no due to being sick, so he decided to get me in the mood. He then used this against me telling me this is karma for being such a sl&t before him, he's told me numerous times I deserved this and not once has he shown remorse for his actions. Even when I fell apart in front of him telling him how repulsive I now feel he told me to simply get over it.

    He then decided in the beginning of December he would take himself off Prozac which he had been on for 10 years, cold turkey, because apprentantly it was causing liver damage and was his doctors orders (I know no doctor in their right mind would recommend this to someone). This is when he got worst still, basically he only left my bedroom for work or when he had too, eg; Christmas morning, he spent hours upon hours in there, not talking, not touching, just zombie. I begged him to speak to someone, I begged him to go back on his meds, to just get better

    Since the break up he has become pure evil, using herpes against me numerous times still, telling me how I can't go be with anyone any more etc etc.

    He has also used my childhood abuse by my father against me and then when I got mad confessed he to had been abused a a child but unlike my mother, his protected him, he knows this hits a huge nerve with me

    He has also admitted to being addicted to crystal meth for the past 4 years, and although I knew he took it occasionally (don't need lectures here please) he finally confessed he had only been 3 days maximum without it in those 4 years. He was high the night he wouldn't accept me saying no.

    Yesterday it all came to a head when he sent me a complete word transcript of all our text messages and advised me he had also recorded all our phone conversations since I contracted herpes in case I ever tried to get back at him.

    I'm speechless, this man lay next to me every night through November and December and all the while he was logging all our communications without my knowledge for, as he puts it, 'just in case', who does that? He let me spoil him rotten at christmas where I received presents that where not even things I would like (candles and steak knives, need I say more), he sat in my room while I stressed over him while trying to care for DD, the house, deal with an std I couldn't talk to him about without him going further in a hole, and he was doing this to me?

    I feel so used, my privacy and trust so violated by a man I thought I knew

    Not once did he say a nice word about me, he did however take great joy in making fun of me despite me losing 20kg while with him to try and 'make' him like me.

    I just DON'T get it! How can anyone do that to another person? I have been hurt before but never this bad, and now I have the constant reminder of what he did to me

    I'm a mess to say the least and am so grateful for the awesome friends I have left that have seen the evidence of how evil this boy is (he can not be considered a man).

    I am going to the police tomorrow to see what I can do, he has literally destroyed me and all I ever did was love him

    If you made it this far, thank you xx

  2. #2
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    IMO You need to get a restraining order against him he sounds like an ex of mine best thing I ever did was cut all ties tell the police everything from his drug use to invading privacy n they should be able to apply for one for you

  3. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to jagamoe For This Useful Post:

    laurea  (13-02-2012),singlemumma82  (12-02-2012),sjay  (12-02-2012)

  4. #3
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    Omg honey what a total ar$ehole. He sounds so abusive and horrible. I can't imagine the toll this must have taken on you. It might be worth talking with a counsellor or psych?

    x 1000000000.

    You will come out of this a stronger person. I hope your ex gets syphilis.

  5. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to duckduckgoose For This Useful Post:

    HELPihavea2yrold!  (12-02-2012),singlemumma82  (12-02-2012)

  6. #4
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    Why does he think you having herpes is relevant to anything?? Anything recorded without your knowledge cannot be used as evidence. I wouldn't worry too much.
    This guy sounds crazy. I'd get an order against him if possible.

  7. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Guest1234 For This Useful Post:

    HELPihavea2yrold!  (12-02-2012),laurea  (13-02-2012),MARTTC  (22-02-2012),singlemumma82  (12-02-2012)

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    i am so sorry luvey!!

    All i can say is PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not blame yourself!!!!

    As hard as it may be, you WILL survive without him, and it will be better for you and your DD.
    (It's absolutely NOT cool that you have been given a bit*h of a disease, but according to my GP 85% of the population now have type1 herpes, which is the coldsore on the lip virus, but downstairs. Because of the change in sexual activity in the past few years, docs have seen it on the rise.)

    Hopefully the police can give you some assistance/or forward you to someone to help you in your next step in regaining your self confidence and rebuilding yours and your DD's life!

  9. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to TrentsMummy For This Useful Post:

    laurea  (13-02-2012),singlemumma82  (12-02-2012)

  10. #6
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    I couldn't read and not send you lots of hugs. I hope the police can help you tomorrow.


    Sent from my iPad so pardon the errors!

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    singlemumma82  (12-02-2012)

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    I have no advice but sounds horrible I'm so sorry <3 great big hugs <3

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  14. #8
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    Thanks girls.

    I'm hoping now that I've told him I am speaking to the police it will help him pull his head in, but yes I will also be going for a retraining order and breach of privacy and also medical damages as a result of how he have me this disease.

    I have never felt so guttered that someone could actually do this, it's what you hear in movies, not real life.

  15. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by singlemumma82 View Post
    Thanks girls.

    I'm hoping now that I've told him I am speaking to the police it will help him pull his head in, but yes I will also be going for a retraining order and breach of privacy and also medical damages as a result of how he have me this disease.

    I have never felt so guttered that someone could actually do this, it's what you hear in movies, not real life.

    I wouldn't be speaking to him without either a lawyer or a police present. You never know what BS he may make up about you.

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    laurea  (13-02-2012)

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    I haven't got any advice except contacting the police but I couldn't read this and not at least send your way. Good luck tomorrow

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    singlemumma82  (12-02-2012)


 

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