+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 9 of 9
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    29
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    2
    Reviews
    0

    Default Baby's gender

    This is really hard for me to say 'out loud', so please don't judge. I have a 2.5 year old daughter and am 20-weeks pregnant with baby #2. We had our scan this morning, and have decided {like we did with out daughter} NOT to find out the gender. However... despite seeing no genitals during the scan, hubby and I think that baby is a boy, because it had a "boy face". I wouldn't use the word 'disappointed', because I'm not, and we don't know the gender for sure, and I KNOW I will love and bond with my baby no matter the gender, but as I am one of two girls myself, I guess I was just hoping that my daughter would share the same relationship with her sister. I am sure I'm not the first mother to worry about genders, and putting it into perspective, it's really irrelevant because I am blessed enough to be growing a perfectly healthy baby. I suppose I just see myself as a 'girl mum', because I do have a daughter. The thought of possibly having a son scares me a little! I thought this would be a safe place to vent, and perhaps find that I am not alone. Thanks ladies

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    444
    Thanks
    84
    Thanked
    60
    Reviews
    0
    Hugs. I currently think my pg is a girl, and I would dearly love a brother for DS. However we hope to not stop at two. Given this is an LTTTC IVF pg I feel bad that I say I want a specific gender when I truly am just great duo to be pg. but I totally get where you are coming from. Have you though about finding out just to help you bond? I found out with DS and want to again this time but dh really doesn't want to


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    29
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    2
    Reviews
    0
    I too feel awful, because this baby was conceived with the help of an IUI cycle. I know I'll love whichever gender it is when it's born, as I can definitely see the pros of having one of each. I think by telling myself now that it's a boy {whether it actually is or not}, in a little while I'll be fine with the idea of it. I think truthfully, I am just nervous about being a "boys mum"!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    29
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    2
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by pynk View Post
    I thought I wanted a girl this time but since finding out we are having a boy I am happy as that means miss 2 is my only little princess to spoil lol

    Sent from my HUAWEI SONIC using BubHub

    That's a very good point! I like that take on it!

  5. #5
    Shortiii's Avatar
    Shortiii is offline Baby H v2.0 - Anticipating April release
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    784
    Thanks
    62
    Thanked
    63
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    We found out the sex. Both DH and I wanted a girl... badly. At the NT scan everyone commented how girly and dainty the face looked, especially in comparison to DS's scans.
    We found out we're having another boy... we were pretty devastated. But I am glad we found out for us, it's given me time to accept having 2 sons and be excited to meet him. We also decided after originally having only 2 kids, that we will most probably have 3 now.. so thats helped too. We have picked a name I LOVE for him, this is also helping.
    I know youre not finding out the sex, but it's not all over for you yet. Our very girly faced baby is another boy... you may have a girl yet. I think gender diappointment is so common and theres a variety of reasons people feel the way they do, not that its wrong.
    I very much hope you get your girl, however I know you will love your baby no matter the sex. I know the minute you mention gender disappointment, people assume you wont love your baby as much, I know what you mean

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    29
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    2
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Shortiii View Post
    We found out the sex. Both DH and I wanted a girl... badly. At the NT scan everyone commented how girly and dainty the face looked, especially in comparison to DS's scans.
    We found out we're having another boy... we were pretty devastated. But I am glad we found out for us, it's given me time to accept having 2 sons and be excited to meet him. We also decided after originally having only 2 kids, that we will most probably have 3 now.. so thats helped too. We have picked a name I LOVE for him, this is also helping.
    I know youre not finding out the sex, but it's not all over for you yet. Our very girly faced baby is another boy... you may have a girl yet. I think gender diappointment is so common and theres a variety of reasons people feel the way they do, not that its wrong.
    I very much hope you get your girl, however I know you will love your baby no matter the sex. I know the minute you mention gender disappointment, people assume you wont love your baby as much, I know what you mean

    Thank you SO much. This is exactly what I think I needed to hear. I was so afraid to post this, scared that people would think that I'm not going to love my baby if it's a boy. I am honestly just so grateful to be pregnant again that in the grand scheme of things, gender doesn't matter. I am still excited to not know the gender for sure, and my guess may be wrong. And if it's right, I will be just as stoked and in love with my baby boy just as much as if it was another girl. Thank you

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to miaedensmummy For This Useful Post:

    Shortiii  (06-02-2012)

  8. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    495
    Thanks
    49
    Thanked
    56
    Reviews
    0
    I totally get what you mean and it's very common!
    I wanted a baby girl since I was 14 I had a name picked out n everything. Even before DH and I started ttc I was sure I was going to have a girl... Turned out bubs was a boy.. I cried all the way home. Only lasted a few days and I was over it and excited bout meeting our lil man, it hit home how much gender dosnt matter when I found out I could lose him before he was born.
    I have to say I would never swap him for a girl and he is just so prefect. He is a gorgeous lil boy and I am so glad we had a baby boy.
    I am preg with number 2 now and the want for a girl has come back. I hate to say this and I can't believe I could but I will be devastated if it's another boy, I hate my self for saying it but i can't help feeling this way. I was told girl at 16 weeks but I'm freaking out they are wrong it's all I can think about . Sucks cos I just want to be happy about having another bubba.

    It really helped me to find out thou cos I needed that time before
    DS was born to get used to the idea and also it helps buying cute clothes and picking a name. Oh and there are heaps or cute boy clothes out there

    Also I have a twin bro and we used to have so much fun playing as kids I'm glad I had a bro and not a sis. Hope some of this makes sense and helps

  9. #8
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    996
    Thanks
    46
    Thanked
    34
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    you will love the baby when it is born whatever the sex may be.
    if you dont want gender disappointment maybe find out the sex so you can get your head around the sex you are having.

    this baby looked like a girl at my nt scan(very girly looking lips) and a doctor who did a scan a few days later even said it was a girl.
    found out at our morph scan that she is infact a HE lol.

    good luck xo

  10. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Perth WA
    Posts
    722
    Thanks
    56
    Thanked
    47
    Reviews
    9
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by miaedensmummy View Post
    This is really hard for me to say 'out loud', so please don't judge. I have a 2.5 year old daughter and am 20-weeks pregnant with baby #2. We had our scan this morning, and have decided {like we did with out daughter} NOT to find out the gender. However... despite seeing no genitals during the scan, hubby and I think that baby is a boy, because it had a "boy face". I wouldn't use the word 'disappointed', because I'm not, and we don't know the gender for sure, and I KNOW I will love and bond with my baby no matter the gender, but as I am one of two girls myself, I guess I was just hoping that my daughter would share the same relationship with her sister. I am sure I'm not the first mother to worry about genders, and putting it into perspective, it's really irrelevant because I am blessed enough to be growing a perfectly healthy baby. I suppose I just see myself as a 'girl mum', because I do have a daughter. The thought of possibly having a son scares me a little! I thought this would be a safe place to vent, and perhaps find that I am not alone. Thanks ladies
    This could almost be me writing this! I feel/felt exactly the same. I was one of 2 girls and I so wanted my children to have a bond like we do. I was convinced from day dot of pregnancy 2 that it was a boy. DP was convinced it was another girl. We didn't find out 1st time but did this time. I'm now so glad we did so that I have had time to prepare myself. One of my biggest fears being 'I don't know what to do with a boy!' But, as pynk said I'll always have my princess to spoil. She and I have (at the moment) a really special relationship. I feel guilty for having such thoughts and have even managed to convince myself that something bad is going to happen because I was disappointed. I've never spoken out loud about this (though I think DP does know), and I'm sure I'll love him just as much as my DD. Now if only I could find a name for him


 

Similar Threads

  1. how to announce the baby's gender?
    By Kalmumtobe in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 29-09-2012, 14:48
  2. To find out the baby's gender or not?
    By Hopefully Waiting in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 07-08-2012, 10:03

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Bamboo Lulu
Unique, non-toxic wooden eco toys for babies. Water-based paints, saliva-resistant & baby safe. Super soft, prints & basics for baby, made from bamboo & organic cotton. Hypoallergenic - great for eczema relief. FREE gift with purchase. Code BUBHUB
sales & new stuffsee all
Bub Hub Sales Listing
HAVING A SALE? Let parents know about it with a Bub Hub Sales listing. Listings are featured on our well trafficked Sales Page + selected randomly to appear on EVERY page
featured supporter
121Temps
For the last 10 years 121 Temps has helped thousands of personal assistants/others to set up and work as a virtual assistant from home. Our services include: - One-2-One Mentoring - Online Training/Courses - Handbook, Toolkits, Templates & more.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!