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  1. #1
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    Default Why cant you grow the eff up? (Vent more than anything)

    Seriously FOB does my flippin' head in! To the outside world we have a great relationship, we attend just about everything related to the kids together, sports, dancing, school functions etc usually with our OHs.
    I strive to keep it this way for the kids.

    Underneath though its just BS.

    Aside from show his face at the big things, where everyone can see, he does nothing. NOTHING!! Doesn't take them to any of their training or rehersals, no birthday parties, if they fall on his day then they stay with me and I take them, forking out for the gift of course.

    He had his cousins wedding over the weekend, so he wanted the kids. No problems there. Except I had to dress them and make sure they had nice stuff to go in.
    He returns DD on Sunday morning, in agony. He was supposed to take both kids to school Monday. DD has a sore, visibly swollen ear. She had been like that all day sat she tells me and he wouldn't even get her a panadol. I rush her to the GP and she has a boil in her ear. Dr tells me its quite large and would be incredibly painful. She has anti-bs. ear drops and nurofen 6 hrly.

    He does this EVERY time! Every time they get sick on his watch I have to go get them and take them to the GP because he can't be stuffed. He lives about 4 minutes from us, and our GP (we all see the same one) is about 1 minute from my place. I guess I was lucky he dropped her off, although he was on his way to get new tyres and drove right past my street, he still had the nerve to ask me to drive to the shopping center and get her so he wouldn't have to stop!
    Last time DD was sick I had to go get her and rush her to the ED where they thought she had meningitis!
    DS has been in hosp with a dislocated elbow & a broken knee cap, after a fall off a boat, DD with a broken ankle, a foot x 2 amongst other childhood mishaps and injuries and not ONE of those times did he bother showing up. DH did. My sisters, parents and friends did. But not their father. Even though he was sitting on his @ss at home.
    He pays for none of their school stuff, none of their sport or dancing, no uniforms NOTHING. Ive never received a single dollar in CS in the 8 years we have been separated. That's my fault, I'm still to cowardly to fight it, but Im also used to paying for everything for them, even when we were together Id take care of all the bills and kids things while he blew his cash on cars and gadgets.

    This morning he had DS as he wanted to take him to school, but he still rocks up to the door at 7.40 am because DS had "lost" his socks Id sent him with o Saturday, he had no drink bottle and only a sandwich and apple for lunch. DS doesn't and has never eaten sandwiches. He will eat rolls, or salads. They are used to big lunches/snacks as I put dips, cut fruit or fruit cups, yogurt and biscuits in as well.


    Im so fed up with having to pick up the pieces of his crap parenting. But I'll continue to do it with a smile, because my kids don't need to miss out, and I love them more than I hate him.

    Vent over!

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    He sounds awful. Is it possible to get your kids a mobile so that if they are ill, they can notify you? You don't say how old they are.

    I would be livid if my fob did this but fortunately we don't have to put up with him!

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    He is awful, wish I didn't have to deal with him at all! They are 11 & 12. We just gave DS a mobile this morning as he started high school and will catch the bus home, It should come in handy because FOB doesn't often let them call unless they really make a fuss, which they don't like to do because he smacks them
    Last edited by RunningWithScissors; 06-02-2012 at 11:40.

  4. #4
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    GluttonForPunishment is offline Bubhub Award Winner - 2011- Most Optimistic Poster and Newbie of the Year Awards
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    Not much I can say or offer in the way of advice etc. But seriously, what an a$$hole!


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    I feel your frustration. We have been through the things you have mentioned & it is annoying!

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    Thanks to both of you

    Frustrates me to no end! I called FOB after I posted this and asked him if he could get DS some more socks form the uniform shop.... I get a message later on complaining that they are $9.50 a pair. I told him, yeah I know, expensive to clothe them isn't it? Im grateful he grabbed them though, most of the time he says yes and then I wait 3 weeks before getting them myself.

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    Wow, this guy sounds shocking!

    It appears that he wants all of the fun that comes with being a father, and none of the responsibility.

    You have the patience of a saint...I would have spat it with him a long time ago I think.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to LoveyDovey For This Useful Post:

    Californication  (06-02-2012)

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    I really don't understand parents like that. If my kid was in hospital, you couldn't drag me from their bedside! He sounds like he needs to grow up and stop being a selfish you know what.

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    RunningWithScissors  (06-02-2012)

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    Oh I spit it Lovey - just not at him! Once the kids are gone I get there with DH or my sisters and pay out on him something terrible I get satisfaction knowing that the most important people can see.

    I also get a massive amount of smug satisfaction when we are all out together and the kids go up to DH and ask him for things instead of FOB..it makes people look at him funny! Not to mention DDs dance school thought DH was her father until FOB showed up at a mid year concert! Same with DS bball... everyone thought DH was his dad because its the only male they ever saw for a good year or so!
    Last edited by RunningWithScissors; 06-02-2012 at 17:26. Reason: spelling boo boos

  12. #10
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    What a douche! Lucky for you kids, they have a great Mum!

    Doesn't make your life easier, but at least you can sleep at night knowing you do your best for them everyday!

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to chubby bunny For This Useful Post:

    RunningWithScissors  (06-02-2012)


 

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