I was talking to DH about smacking and i was saying how I hate it and how we wont EVER be smacking our kids (this was after i had a big melt down remembering my childhood and how i was treated)
well, he seems to think that smacking is fine and "it never hurt him as a kid". I said to him he wont be smacking our kids, and he said "well don't let me discipline them then, cos he will be smacking them"....i then said to him if he smacks our kids im outa there, then he starts yelling (and swearing) at me and saying how im not going to be able to control our kids and that im stupid for thinking that other forms of discipline will work on a kid who is having a tantrum and screaming the house down. what the hell, he knows how i feel about it, i broke down into tears in front of him and it went from tears to crying so hard i could not breathe, how could he think that its ok, he wont only be hurting our kids... he will be hurting me too and i dont think that is ok.
the fact of the matter is, that it hurts me so much to even think about our kids being smacked. i dont know what to do about it, i have tried reasoning with him. i have tried telling him how it makes me feel, i have tried telling him other means of discipline but he just wont take it. i just cannot get it through to him how much it upsets me (even after crying and yelling about what happened to me as a kid/ teen)
he demonstrated on me how hard/ soft it would be (using the back of my hand) but to tell you the truth i was terrified when he did it, i was scared of my husband when he did that (thats not how it should be)
there was more to it than that but im upset so will leave it as that.
what do i do.
please dont take any of what i say out of context, it relates to me personally and i am in no way saying anything against parents who smack (because thats your choice) i am in desperate need of help on how to deal with my sitauation... nothing else. cheers.