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  1. #31
    Mrs Molly Coddle's Avatar
    Mrs Molly Coddle is offline I've admitted in writing that veve is awesome - eeek she has proof!!!
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    Quote Originally Posted by kbf2plus2 View Post
    Hi OP

    Has this behaviour been triggered by something or is that how he has always been?
    My daughter (who is now 4.5 years old) went through the whole "not letting me out of her sight thing" about 12 months ago -- just after her baby brother died. I think she thought that if she couldn't see me, I was going to be dead too or something similar. She'd be playing happily by herself or with her sister and then suddenly realise she hadn't seen me recently and come flying out to find me in a most distressed state. Same as you... even if I just went out onto the verandah for two seconds to get milk from the outside fridge or something.
    She is much better now, but still gets anxious if I have gone outside or to another room without letting her know where I'll be.
    I'm no expert on what to do. I've just figured it's part of her grief and tried to support her through it as best we can, by trying to remember to let her know if I'm going somewhere and reassuring her that (God willing) I'm not going to die any time soon.

    Mitty -- it sounds like your little one could be a highly sensitive child. There is a book called "The Highly Sensitive Child" and it might be helpful for you. Highly sensitive children need extra support in alot of situations that other less-sensitive children don't. My eldest daughter is highly sensitive and I don't think she would have coped at all well with daycare or kindy or any of those things where I wasn't close by. She's just started school though and has taken to it like a fish in water. I feel the difference is she was never pushed into "strange" situations if she wasn't feeling comfortable. We were going to playgroup for a while but ended up pulling out because neither of my girls were mixing with the other children -- there was too much hussle and bussle and noise for them to feel comfortable.

    Hope that helps somehow.
    kbfplus2 - I am so sorry for your loss It does sound exactly like my son, but nothing major has happened to him The GP asked the same thinhg. He has always clung to me, even as a baby. My GP did ask if he had experienced anything traumatic as I think it would explain his behaviour, like in the case of your daughter. I can imagine it is a very normal part of her grieving considering the terrible circumstances
    Thank you for the book recommendation. I will see ifI can get it on DH's ereader.

    diamondeyes - I will look for the spirited child book as well. It sounds like something I need! DD is sporting a fat lip and a black eye today from being knocked over by him yesterday. Blah.

    rae81 - your poor nephew We have done diet changes and haven't noticed any dramatic changes. We just try and avoid the really obvious stuff now, like MSG and colours, as they do make him a bit worse but nothing more subtle seems to make a diff.


    I shall keep this thread updated as to our progress. Hopefully it will be helpful to someone.
    I haven't heard back from the GP yet about a new referral or about the anxiety clinic. Hopefully I get a call today.

    Thanks to all for your support, advice and hugs! It has been a real help for me

  2. #32
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    Zombie_eyes is offline Formerly Diamondeyes
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    i probably didnt word my post right or actually explain what i meant.

    i think the book is a load of shiz, it basically said my boys are just spirited and dont have asd!! sham! there was a story about a woman who was late to the class because her son was losing the plot over his socks and needed them taken off and put back on twisted in different ways etc just to feel right.

    thats not spirited thats sensory issues!!!!

    i have a copy if u want me to post it to you, but pleaaaaaaaaaaase dont let that book convince u of anything.

    i got 3 chapters in and was infuriated by it. because no doubt a lot of parents with kids clearly on the spectrum, will read that book and think "oh its fine he/she is just spirited"

  3. #33
    Mrs Molly Coddle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DiamondEyes View Post
    i probably didnt word my post right or actually explain what i meant.

    i think the book is a load of shiz, it basically said my boys are just spirited and dont have asd!! sham! there was a story about a woman who was late to the class because her son was losing the plot over his socks and needed them taken off and put back on twisted in different ways etc just to feel right.

    thats not spirited thats sensory issues!!!!

    i have a copy if u want me to post it to you, but pleaaaaaaaaaaase dont let that book convince u of anything.

    i got 3 chapters in and was infuriated by it. because no doubt a lot of parents with kids clearly on the spectrum, will read that book and think "oh its fine he/she is just spirited"
    Ohhh.. my bad. Sorry I misunderstood. Can I still blame baby brain if DD is over 1? Ha!
    Well, in that case I'm glad I have only downloaded the sample.

  4. #34
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    I am struggling so much with this now. Today, for instance, we were at my sister's and he was playing outside and kept making this noise. It's something from a tv show and he just kept screaming it over and over. I asked him to stop a number of times as it was freaking my niece out. He wouldn't stop so I was telling him to look at me in the eyes so I knew he was listening. Anyhow he wouldn't look at me, cracked the poos and threw a tennis racquet. My sister then told him off for throwing things (fair enough and she is never mean, always fair) and he started bawling. He was climbing all over me crying and she was trying to get him to say sorry and I thought.. Just leave it, yanno? But then.. If it was her DD (same age), she would be expected to apologise. My sister wasn't being horrible. She wS just saying "you could really hurt yourself or one of the babies, or someone else, or one of the dogs and you need to be more careful and say sorry."
    I just don't know how to act now.
    No call from GP yet. Just had to unload so there ya go

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    We have made some progress. Public OT has said she will asses my boy, not as in depth as a private OT but it is something.

    Is it just me and wish that it was easier, that it isnt a constant struggle or fight. I love love my kids and my son with anxiety has such a loving personality. Tonight he told me he loved me to out of space and back and then said I love you until you die. I then told him that infact you love somebody even after they die. Then he started to cry and was worried, telling me I would die before him. Just another thing for him to worry about and it reallly shouldnt worry his precious heart. He is only 5.

    I also did have a laugh today when filling out an update of a medical form for school. Anxiety was one of the medical conditions and you had to put down what were the symptoms and as much info as possible. Also how to treat. ........i was thinking maybe writing down everything that doesnt bother him....the list may be shorter.

  8. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by mitty View Post


    We have made some progress. Public OT has said she will asses my boy, not as in depth as a private OT but it is something.

    Is it just me and wish that it was easier, that it isnt a constant struggle or fight. I love love my kids and my son with anxiety has such a loving personality. Tonight he told me he loved me to out of space and back and then said I love you until you die. I then told him that infact you love somebody even after they die. Then he started to cry and was worried, telling me I would die before him. Just another thing for him to worry about and it reallly shouldnt worry his precious heart. He is only 5.

    I also did have a laugh today when filling out an update of a medical form for school. Anxiety was one of the medical conditions and you had to put down what were the symptoms and as much info as possible. Also how to treat. ........i was thinking maybe writing down everything that doesnt bother him....the list may be shorter.
    Oh mitty that is so sad Poor little thing Glad to hear you finally have someone who will assess him. Do you know when it will be?

  9. #38
    Mrs Molly Coddle's Avatar
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    Just a bit of an update. We are seeing the paed in April. My GP faxed our referral to the paed and they called to offer us an earlier appt which is great. Wr had our first psych appointment this week. It went OK. DS was very distressed so I left early with him and DD, while DH finished the session. She seems good but perhaps a little cold. Time will tell how we get on I suppose. Wr have to keep a diary of his meltdowns and anxious episodes for 2 weeks then we see her again. Keeping the diary is quite eye opening and confronting.

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    Hi Mrs Molly Coddle

    Well he has yet to be assessed or what we have been told a sensory profile will be made. I was supposed to get a phone call sometime during last week/this week and well we havent heard a god damn thing. So not sure. Have a phone meeting with our public psychologist in a week or so and will follow up on it.

    Our medical registrar decided that since therapy of over a year and a course for me hasnt worked than medication was the go. Im not happy about it, but Im willing to try anything for him to be a normal functioning child. Anxiety can be so delibitating. So we have been doing the medication for a week and a half and it will be about 4 weeks before we see any significant changes.

    This school holidays are going to be fun as this will be the first time that we need to use vacation care. Will only be for week two as MIL will be staying with the kids(not sure if that is a bad idea or not).

    I would see how your psychologist appts go and if you arent jelling with them then you need to find another. You really need to feel confident and comfortable and so does your son especially with having anxiety.


 

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