+ Reply to Thread
Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 34
  1. #21
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    2,237
    Thanks
    3,290
    Thanked
    716
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Last edited by FloatingFairy; 06-02-2012 at 21:47.

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    10
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked
    1
    Reviews
    0
    Thanks Shannonigons. Can I ask how old your DD is? How is she coping? And how did you explain it to her? I've had lots of great feedback already but the more the merrier!

    The very best of luck to you.

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    2,237
    Thanks
    3,290
    Thanked
    716
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    ,..
    Last edited by FloatingFairy; 06-02-2012 at 21:46.

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    casino
    Posts
    1,958
    Thanks
    2,916
    Thanked
    333
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by another anonymous View Post
    So here I am, another mum facing the role of a single parent. I am not often on here, but don't want to chance anyone working out who I am as we haven't told anyone yet.

    I told DH last night that we need to separate. I am on here for so many reasons so I'll just ramble and if you can help me with any of them please, please do.

    Firstly, I feel guilty for breaking up our family. We have an 18 month old and a 3 1/2 year old. I think the younger one is too little to be too greatly affected, but it is going to break the heart of my perceptive, intelligent, sensitive older one. Does anyone have any tips on breaking the news to him.

    I feel so guilty because my DH is not a bad man - he is a gentleman who really wants to be the best husband and father he can. He is a great father, but he is just not a great husband. He is really emotionally stunted, he shows no affection, we have had no intimacy, physical or otherwise for over 3 years and he just does not "care" for me. The final straw was when he took the kids for a walk, the 3 1/2 year old fell and skun his knee and wanted mummy. DH brought them back and I started comforting the 3 1/2 year old. So the younger one wanted mum as well and started crawling all over me and bumping the sore knee. And DH just watched. I was struggling to give them both what they needed and he just watched. He doesn't let me know when he won't be home for the older ones bedtime (due to work), so I can't prepare him and he gets really upset. He never kisses me, hugs me, tells me his hopes and dreams. He is really controlled and measured and never really lets go. He has no close friends, no interests, does not want to explore different interests that I have suggested together, nothing. For him it is the kids and work and I just can't live like that. But he is not a bad man. How on earth do I get over the guilt?

    Finally I have suggested that instead of unheaving the kids he and I swap houses. So we rent a house and when he has access I pack a few essentials and go there and the rest of the time he lives there. Has anyone done this and how did it go.

    So I've rambled and I hope some of you have made it this far. I am just so devastated and lost but I hope that someone can help me work through this to minimise the impact on my beautiful children. Thanks for reading.
    So my DP and I just split and similar situation our DS5 and DD14 months we told our DS that dads moving back to na and pops place n mummy him n Lil sister staying in this house n dad will still be here lots n take him to school n pick him up etc we told him mum n dad fight too much n need a break from each other he said his heart was breaking n cried but once we explained in terms he could understand he's fine I'd suggest u n kids stay in house n your DP lives elsewhere but still visit every day or as much as possible and make it fun like you're having a sleep over at dads tonight n hilight all positives hope this helps

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    2,237
    Thanks
    3,290
    Thanked
    716
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by jagamoe View Post
    we told him mum n dad fight too much n need a break from each other he said his heart was breaking n cried


    That would have killed me to hear that


    •Sent from my iPhone•

  6. #26
    GluttonForPunishment's Avatar
    GluttonForPunishment is offline Bubhub Award Winner - 2011- Most Optimistic Poster and Newbie of the Year Awards
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    Brisbane
    Posts
    1,209
    Thanks
    466
    Thanked
    1,796
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    When ex-DW and I split, we explained it that mum and dad didn't love each other anymore. That we had been arguing heaps and we didn't want to argue anymore. BUT, we both loved both girls sooooo much and that absolutely, positively it was not their fault.

    Now, thing was, we told the truth! Mum and dad don't argue anymore! And the girls have never been happier! And I mean that! They are soooooo happy! Mum's happy. Dad's happy. Life is good!




    You'll have to excuse the iPhone auto correct. It sax!

  7. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to GluttonForPunishment For This Useful Post:

    FloatingFairy  (04-02-2012),trishalishous  (05-02-2012)

  8. #27
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Posts
    28,229
    Thanks
    1,515
    Thanked
    992
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Sounds like he suffers from some kind of depression?

  9. #28
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    my house
    Posts
    17,710
    Thanks
    1,392
    Thanked
    7,295
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Don't stay just for the kids. Would you leave if you didn't have children, or were not married?

  10. #29
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    10
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked
    1
    Reviews
    0
    Thanks again all. Yes, BigRedV, I told him a month ago that if it weren't for the kids I would leave but that I didn't want to break up our family, but of course it just didn't work. Thanks again all for your great feedback and suggestions. I am feeling more positive about handling it today.

  11. #30
    bellalika's Avatar
    bellalika is offline I'm trying my hardest, please don't ask for more.
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    Vic
    Posts
    4,491
    Thanks
    175
    Thanked
    717
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Glad your feeling more positive. I admire your strength.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Separation
    By huffybear in forum General Chat
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 20-07-2013, 13:32
  2. Where to start? Separation
    By Mylittlebear in forum Single Parents
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 10-02-2012, 23:58

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Babybee Prams
Save $50 in our pre-Christmas sale! All Comet's now only $500. Our bassinet & stroller set includes free shipping AUS wide, $75 free accessories, 18-months warranty & a 9 month free return policy. Check out our new designer range today!
sales & new stuffsee all
True Fairies
True Fairies is the first interactive website where children can engage and speak with a real fairy through the unique webcam fairy portal. Each session is tailored to the child, and is filled with enchantment and magic.
Visit website to find out more!
featured supporter
Billington Street
For stationery as unique as you are! ♥ Handmade, custom designed stationery for all of life's celebrations
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!