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  1. #1
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    Default Child led parenting or Parent led parenting?

    Who does what and why?

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    Child led parenting here

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    Child led. As for why? It's what worked for us. He established his own routine as a baby and has changed it to suit his needs as he has grown. Sometimes it takes me a few days to realise he's changed it though!!

    I follow his lead within reason. I know he likes to go out, but not every day. So I plan my week and appts around that.

    My wants and feelings weren't often taken into consideration as a kid, and I hated that. So I don't want to do that to my kids.

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    When he was a baby, I followed his cues because I do believe babies cry for a reason, they're hungry when they're hungry and they sleep when they're tired. As he got older, I set the routine. He seems to thrive on structure and likes to know that lunch time is at X o'clock, bed time is at X o'clock etc. He's a happy chappy

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    I think we are a bit of a mix here. I enforce a bed time, meal times etc, based around the school day. I restrict tv, wii, computer time. However if my kids don't want to eat dinner that's ok (although I won't offer anything else), if they feel they need to sleep in our room for whatever reason they can, I respect their ideas and feelings about things. I (and i think hubby is finally 'getting it' ) don't punish my kids, although I do allow natural consequences to happen in order to teach them things, and I remove them from the situation if things are getting out of hand (fighting and stuff). I allow them choices within choices if that makes sense, so I might say 'would you like fruit or carrots and dip for recess, so it's their 'choice', but they can't choose junk food.

    As babies I breasted, not really in demand but not to a strict schedule either. I never really felt I was enforcing a routine, although I would always do full feeds and did not offer the breast every time they cried. When they started eating, I'd mash food to feed with a spoon and give them food to feed themselves as u didn't feel they had the co-ordination to completely feed themselves.

    So yeah, we are pretty easy going in terms if parenting, I know a lot of people think I am too blase but I don't want my kids to grow up feeling restricted by boundaries, but I do know boundaries are definitely essential in raising happy, safe kids (which child-led parenting recognises anyway).

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    Co-operative parenting here. We work together.

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    Mostly child led because its easier for me really. I demand fed, let him wean gradually, waited until he was ready to toilet train. I wait until he's tired before I put him to bed. Etc.

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    I have no idea. Is there seat-of-your-pants parenting?

    I take cues from my kids but I wouldn't say I'm child led. But parent led doesn't fit either.

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    Bit of a balance here...I can't do all one or all the other. Probably more what MissMuppet said...seat-of-your-pants LOL

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    Another who flys by the seat if their pants or wing it.

    What ever you want to call it.


 

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