+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 6 of 6
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default 9 moth old asked not to return to FDD

    My 9mth old starrted FDD on Monday as I unforntuatly had to return to work. Day 1, according to the career went well. I then dropped him off yesterday at noon (I work shift work and my DP would pick him up after work at 5:30). DS had been there just two hourse and I got a call from the career saying that she was unable to settle him and could I please come and collect him. I arrived and DS was asleep in her husbands arms. When I arrived the career advised me that they were not bonding, my DS was unsettling to the other children and that she could no longer care for him. I was dumbfounded!!

    Since this all unfolded I have gone through so many emotions. Firstly I have to say I am glad that she informed me and that DS was not allowed to stay in a situation that could have been harmful and damaging.

    I just feel that it takes a little more than 8 hours to bond with a child. I fear that her expectations of settling were unrealsitic (though she has 10+ year child care experence???). DS is teething (though this hasn't caused us much grief at home) and usually breastfeed. Though he happily takes a bottle and is on solid food (both which he had there yesterday).

    When we went to meet her we said that he didn't have a routine as such, that he was demand BF and we let him take the lead. She said that that was fine and was happy to work with our DS. Obviously not!

    Ultimatly I feel a little hurt because he is my DS, I love him and it's hard not to take it a little personally also. FDC were very suprised and have requested that I out line what happened in a letter. They have also provided the names of other careers. I'm hesitant as once bitten twice shy, but what to do??

    I just wanted to out this out there and see what others had to say. Sorry this is a little disordered but so much still going around in my head.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Queensland, Australia
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Sounds like she's in the wrong profession to me in fact from you've said she honestly sounds like a bit of a crack pot. I mean she doesn't have a "bond" with your son after 8 hours....really and a crying baby unsettling other kids....you're kidding ?!

    Seriously OP she sounds like an idiot and it's a good thing you found out now not all carers are like her, in fact most aren't LOL so don't let this experience put you off finding someone else.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    my son's fdc was terminated as well (after almost 3 years). It's really upsetting, and you feel devastated that you left your child with someone who doesn't want them.

    On the upside, at least you found out early rather than prolonging the situation.

    The downside of fdc is the carer is a law unto themselves. they seem pickier about the children they take vs centres.

    But I'm sure you could find somebody else. It's hard after a knockback though. I cried for a week when it happened to us, but once you find new care, you'll feel better.

  4. #4
    StretchmarkBarbie's Avatar
    StretchmarkBarbie is offline Senior Member
    Winner 2009- Best Username Award
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Sorry but I would be stoked the woman had the strength to tell you that. What if she had kept her mouth shut and not been able to cope with your little boys needs? At least in a centre they can ask someone else for assistance. She saw her limits and knew it was not in hers, your baby and the other children's best interest to continue caring for him.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to StretchmarkBarbie For This Useful Post:

    sweetsugardumplin'  (10-02-2012)

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Sounds to me like she only wants perfect children to make her job easier. If she can't deal with a crying baby then she shouldn't be doing fdc. It sounds like his better off not being there

    I hope you find somebody lovely to cate for him. It is so stressful leaving your baby in the first place but remember not everybody is like her

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to insanity For This Useful Post:

    Pinkzy  (01-02-2012)

  8. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Are you only looking at FDC? My son goes to a centre and I'm sure he loves being with all the other kids. Also, out of the 3 staff there he has really bonded with one in particular. It's funny because he's not at all interested in the other 2.

    I was a bit hesitant about FDC to be honest because I have worked in LDC and been at home with my DS all day since he was born. I know there are days that I get so frustrated with him and sometimes I just let him cry (not for a huge amount of time). I do this for my own sanity and because he is my own son. I would hate for anybody else to do this for him. At least in LDC if a child is driving you up the wall, you can ask another staff member to step in - also you can have breaks in between.

    I don't mean to put down FDC as ideally it would be a good option. I'm just saying that I have enough trouble coping with one child on my own, let along a group of them that aren't mine.


Similar Threads

  1. Re those who asked for a Pm
    By Theboys&me in forum General Chat
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 25-06-2012, 14:21
  2. Bleeding non stop, first moth on Levlen ED
    By Liddybugs in forum Contraception issues
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 08-02-2012, 08:56

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Free weekly newsletters | Sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

learn how you can become a reviewer!


forum - chatting now
sales & new stuffsee all
Juju Menstrual Cup
JuJu Reusable Menstrual Cup is made in Australia from hypoallergenic medical grade silicone. JuJu Cup is convenient, eco-friendly and economical. Make the switch to JuJu Cup today. Use promo code bubhub at checkout for a 20% discount.
featured supporter
Transition into Parenthood / Calmbirth Sydney
Transition into Parenthood (TiP) and Calmbirth courses for pregnant couples provide all you need to feel ready, prepared and organised for the wonderful birth of your beautiful new baby. Julie gives the best value discount on both courses $100 off.

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!