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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    How did you move past it?
    Time, a baby, a car, getting married! Finally having "firsts" together. Realising that he loved me even with all my crazy!!

    It took a good 2-3 years!!! He now even has some added on FB (with my permission )

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  3. #12
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    Shortiii is offline Baby H v2.0 - Anticipating April release
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    Yes. I think you did.

    DH and I both have people we have slept with/dated on our FB. I think being part of a healthy relationship is accepting that you have both had previous partners and not everyone loses contact or friendship. Those relationships helped each of us learn how to be better in the marriage we have

    If it was anything inappropriate, or photos or anything... then I'd be p*ssed. But just a 'hey. hows it going' thing.. wouldn't be something that would bother me at all. I am a very jealous person too, having been in relationships where my other half was unfaithful... but I have learnt it's done me more harm and worry than ever doing any good.

  4. #13
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    99% of the time, being friends with ex's on Facebook is a bad idea. I have had first hand experience and it's not a good situation for anyone.

    You know your other half better than anyone. Just follow your instinct. Most of the time it'll be spot on. If you trust him completely then there probably isn't anything to worry about

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  6. #14
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    I think you over reacted. Sorry.

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  8. #15
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    FearlessLeader is offline Winner 2013 - Most Memorable Thread
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shortiii View Post
    Yes. I think you did.DH and I both have people we have slept with/dated on our FB. I think being part of a healthy relationship is accepting that you have both had previous partners and not everyone loses contact or friendship. Those relationships helped each of us learn how to be better in the marriage we have
    Yeah i agree with this sorry it made you feel yuck, though, sometimes the crazy just gets us for no reason. I'm completely not the jealous type (DP goes out drinking to excess quite regularly with an ex, doesn't bother me at all), but i once got all 'hey!' when a woman from his work once called him in the evening and they chatted for aaages. It was completely irrational and out of character for me, but i think when that happens you have to think if it's about you or them, and maybe just forget it if it's really about you.

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    I am the jealous type (which I hate) and I would definitely been hurt and asking myself questions ('why does he want to talk to her?' etc). I would ask him why he felt the need to communicate with her if they were never good friends to start with - but I wouldn't get angry at him because at the end of the day he hadn't actually done anything wrong.

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    Quote Originally Posted by JordansMummy View Post
    99% of the time, being friends with ex's on Facebook is a bad idea. I have had first hand experience and it's not a good situation for anyone.
    Where do you get that statistic from??

    DF is fb friends with his ex GF - the girl he lost his virginity to. The girl who hurt him so much it took years to get over her. I was confused as to WHY he would even go there. Slight jealousy to begin with, but we spoke and I learnt that it has NOTHING to do with me, and NOTHING to do with their past. He has moved on, he has forgiven and forgotten enough to maintain a friendship with someone who was (once) a huge part of his life. He is with me now, we have a family together, we own a house together, we are getting married. We share a life together. That is a sh** load more than they ever had, and will ever have. I had nothing to be jealous and insecure about, so I had to move past my insecurity, and thats what I did

    OP I think you did over-react, and I think this is probably something you need to talk to your partner about (your insecurity). The past is the past, move on.

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  12. #18
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    I think you over-reacted. I ask past flings how they're going a fair bit on FB and DH doesn't mind in the slightest.

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    I dont think you overacted

  14. #20
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    depends how upset you got. like, mopey upset or shouty upset? shouty upset definitely an overreaction. i'd only be upset about that if the messages were dirty in any way.
    i have both my exes and my first love (never together) on my facebook friends list. i see nothing wrong with having that.

    i'm sorry you're upset but if you're concerned about this you've probably got some trust issues you need to work on.


 

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