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  1. #1
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    Default Anyone out there willing to hold my hand through cyle 13 please?

    Hi all,

    I did introduce myself on a couple of threads but haven't had a whole lot of replies so aim trying again. I probably didn't write too much because I was nervous and may not have posted in the right forums so here's my second attempt! i am still new to this site and am trying desperately to decide whether or not to give up on my eggs and look for a donor.

    I am 43 years old, a health professional, a shift worker, I've never been pregnant and now up to and cycling in cycle number 13. First scan today. 2 follicles. My amazing partner is 46, and dearly wants us both to experience parenthood. His family are very close and he, like me, grew up thinking family is everything.

    We met only 5 years ago, but have been trying to conceive for the last 3-4. The last 2 and a bit of which have been on IVF and ICSI. It turned out I have severe endometriosis. Several of our cycles (regrettably 50%) have been cancelled due to an unusual drug reaction that causes me to spontaneously ovulate, thereby "loosing" my eggs and EPUB is cancelled. The cycles that have made it through have usually resulted in 2-3 eggs and 2 embryos which we have transferred back with no positive results. I never make it to the blood test. My period has always beaten me to it.

    In the attempt to fall pregnant, I have changed my diet and tried to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I've tried herbal treatments and acupuncture and still continue this now. I'm on the highest dose of Gonal F and now, on morning and evening doses of Cetretide, the longer lasting antagonist.

    I had my first informal chat to the counsellor in my IVF clinic today and it was mentioned that it is difficult to conte to cycle and make a decision about whether or not to give up on the dream of a biological child and begin the journey with hopefully, a willing donor.

    I am looking for advice, some hand holding and any insights others more advanced along this path may have.

    I always imagined myself with a family. I am a acaring and responsible person whose job is to care for others but I also care for my elderly mothers and before that for my gran who lived to the amazing age of 102. My husband is the best person ever. I am so blessed to have met him although it took till late in life.


    Looking forward to your feedback/thoughts. Good luck on your own journeys whatever stages you are all at,

    X Giohara

  2. #2
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    Just wanted to say hi and wish you luck. We are still trying to get to our first EPU so I understand how it feels to have cancelled cycles There are some great threads on here, especially for the month that you cycling and there is a lot of support as well. Good luck with it all. Big

  3. #3
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    Hi Giohara
    Sorry to hear that you've had such a long journey trying to conceive. It is such a tough thing to go through. You've been so strong to make it this far...
    Have you had a look at the 'long term IVF warrior women' thread? You might like to post in there too as those ladies have (unfortunately) a lot of experience and you might find some people in the same situation...
    Good luck

  4. #4
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    Hi Giohara, Welcome (even though none of us want to be here). Im sorry to hear you are having so much trouble - IVF is a long hard journey for alot of people. I had 7 transfers with 4 BFP's but losses for three of them.

    I had just turned 40 when I finally got a sticky BFP.

    I dont have too much advice as we weren't having the same type of issues you but Im hear to lend my support in anyway I can!

  5. #5
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    Hi, just want to say I am sorry that you are having such a tough journey. I think you are very brave. We are certainly here for you if you are going to continue to battle on.

  6. #6
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    Another popping in to say hi. Have you tried royal jelly for both you and dh as well as increasing your zinc


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  7. #7
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    Hello

    I just wanted to tell you that I started IVF when I was 42. I had two cycles with the first resulting in one embryo ( only one egg collected which fertilized). The second was two eggs, two fert and in both cycles BFN. It was then my doctor suggested donor eggs. I was not ready to hear that. A friend of mine told me about a Chinese doctor in nsw who assisted people with acupuncture and Chinese herbs. This man had an unbelievable track record. I live in Brisbane so big call and expense to see him. I also started on DHEA. Supposed to help with egg quality but should be on it for three months to get best results.

    I ended up going to see this guy. He put me on 44 pills 3 times a day. He told me I could get pregnant but he could not guarantee quality of eggs. I went home with a suitcase full of pills and quickly started to rattle. My FS thought it was funny. The next cycle I produced 6 eggs of which 3 survived to 3 days. Two were transferred and the other stopped growing. I got my BFP. I was in shock. Fast forward a couple of weeks and I started bleeding. Scan showed one blob with a heartbeat and progesterone support was increased. Nuchal scan came along. My bub was given a 1 in 30 chance of downs. I had the CVS and this confirmed downs. I decided to proceed. When I was 17 weeks pregnant I found out he also had swelling in his brain and no heart chambers. The doctors told me he would not survive. I lost my little boy two weeks later. His name is Oliver.

    After this I went into a deep depression. I blamed myself. My dear sister in law asked me if she could donate eggs. She was only 32. I decided that I would go down that path. She produced 6 embryos with my DH sperm. All were the best grade. I had a double embryo transfer and fell pregnant with Billie, my daughter.


    Billie was mine from day one. She was the love of my life. The other 4 embryos were frozen. My journey was over, or so I thought. Billie was diagnosed with Williams syndrome at five months. She had heart probs and without surgery would die. This syndrome just happens. Billie died after surgery aged 9.5 months old. I am now about to have my final ever transfer of the remaining two frozen embryos on Friday. I am 47.


    I am writing this for one reason. There is hope for you with your eggs. It only takes one good one. I can give you the name and number for the guy in syd. Also, donor eggs was not an option for me. However, after carrying Billie and holding her for the first time, she was mine. It made no difference it was not my egg.

    I wish you luck and every success. There are many ladies on here who have their own miracle.


  8. #8
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    Disney Baby is offline <--- That's my baby at 8 cells old <3 Ahh the perks of IVF =D
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    I am sorry to hear that you are having such trouble.

    I am only in my first cycle, but I just wanted you to know that although many think the number 13 is 'unlucky', It is my favourite number, so I will keep positive for you that this is your LUCKY 13th cycle!



  9. #9
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    I don't know what to say to someone like you who has had it even harder. Your reply humbled me and made me cry.

    Thank you so much for posting it and I wish you every best wish from the bottom of my heart.

    May your embryo grow and flourish inside you and take on some of your own bravery,

    Giohara

  10. #10
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    Default Thanks

    Dear All,

    Thank you all so much for your posts especially so promptly. I'm still a little unclear how this posting works and assumed that if you hit quick reply to a particular person, it goes to them.....but can someone confirm that for me.

    Is it possible to reply to an individual?

    Either way, thank you to Billiesmum for your kind words, the first reply I posted was intended for you although the comments on bravery could apply to all of you.

    Smooch, Thanks for the advice re royal jelly and zinc....how do they work exactly? Are they just supplements?

    I've heard of Dhea but my FS doesn't believe in it and I'm a little scared of side effects given the history of drug reactions I've outlined already.


    Vesper, I haven't seen the long term IVF warrior thread but will check it out.

    Bear and mum, hang in there. Will keep my fingers crossed for your next cycle.

    Mum2OneDS and jackylicky, thanks for your wishes and posting me back.

    I'm very anxious about tomorrows scan and bloods as I feel different o yesterday which is what tends to happen when my eggs have flown the coup.

    This is one time it would be good to be wrong.....Disney Baby, let's hope you're right about number 13!

    giohara


 

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