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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by Witwicky View Post
    I'm curious as to why you see 'platonic' as just friends.

    Platonic love, by definition, is more than friends. It's a love between two people without sexual interaction. This doesn't necessarily mean no affection, and it doesn't mean no commitment or love.
    No I don't believe that. A platonic relationship is what I have with my friends. I'm not intimate with them in the romantic sense, I don't have sex with them, I don't build a life with them or have children with them. I find that if I was in a platonic relationship with my dh that it wouldn't be a relationship anymore and I'd be gone! That's not to say we're not friends....he is my best friend! But he's also the love of my life! And if the romantic love was gone and was replaced by a platonic love....then it just isn't a relationship I would want anymore (in that way anyway)

    I have a platonic best friend too....but she's not the love of my life...I wouldn't forge a life with her in anyway, but she's still my best friend.

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  3. #42
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    I had paragraph spaces where did they go?

  4. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trusty Chords View Post
    If a woman came on here complaining that her husband kept saying he was too tired and shutting her down and not caring about how emotionally lack of sex effects her... Well I'm sure it would be a completely different story. There is always a reason a couple doesn't have sex it's wether or not both parties care enough to address it.
    Actually there was a thread quite some time ago with a woman complaining her husband had no libido. Members said exactly what is being said here. So no reverse sexism just respect for others wishes. Honestly I find it sad someone would pressure their partner into sex when they clearly weren't into it, gender has no bearing.

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  6. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Same. The idea of an open relationship actually makes me feel sick. Heaven forbid DH had an accident or developed a condition where he couldn't do the deed.... I would *cough* service myself.

    I do believe in monogamy. Not from a religious sense, just that that what relationships are about. If you want to sleep around don't get married. If I felt at any time I wanted to sleep with someone else before we got married (we were de facto 6 years before marriage) I would have seen it as a sign something was wrong and not married him.

    I think the 'monogamy isn't normal' thing is often an excuse to cheat in relationships. I will point out I'm not talking about anyone in here. I can in some ways respect that POV, but then don't get married. Why come from the viewpoint that humans can't/shouldn't be faithful then enter into marriage? I guess it can be argued marriage doesn't have to be monogamous.... but why not just be single?

    Hope I haven't offended anyone, I'm more asking genuine questions trying to understand rather than judging. It would be great if someone would be brave enough to share why they have an open marriage and how that ties in with their commitment in marriage...
    I 100%. I have no problems with people not being monogamous, not one bit! But then I don't see the point is that person committing themselves into a partnership with someone or marrying that person. Can't see the point!

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  8. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by Deserama View Post
    No I don't believe that. A platonic relationship is what I have with my friends. I'm not intimate with them in the romantic sense, I don't have sex with them, I don't build a life with them or have children with them. I find that if I was in a platonic relationship with my dh that it wouldn't be a relationship anymore and I'd be gone! That's not to say we're not friends....he is my best friend! But he's also the love of my life! And if the romantic love was gone and was replaced by a platonic love....then it just isn't a relationship I would want anymore (in that way anyway)

    I have a platonic best friend too....but she's not the love of my life...I wouldn't forge a life with her in anyway, but she's still my best friend.
    I agreee.

    I don't know what the actual real definition is of platonic....but the way I see it, platonic is as Des described.

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  10. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Actually there was a thread quite some time ago with a woman complaining her husband had no libido. Members said exactly what is being said here. So no reverse sexism just respect for others wishes. Honestly I find it sad someone would pressure their partner into sex when they clearly weren't into it, gender has no bearing.
    I agree - and I remember that thread. I recall my advice being something along the lines of leave the poor man alone and get a v.i.b.r.....

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  12. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Same. The idea of an open relationship actually makes me feel sick. Heaven forbid DH had an accident or developed a condition where he couldn't do the deed.... I would *cough* service myself.

    I do believe in monogamy. Not from a religious sense, just that that what relationships are about. If you want to sleep around don't get married. If I felt at any time I wanted to sleep with someone else before we got married (we were de facto 6 years before marriage) I would have seen it as a sign something was wrong and not married him.

    I think the 'monogamy isn't normal' thing is often an excuse to cheat in relationships. I will point out I'm not talking about anyone in here. I can in some ways respect that POV, but then don't get married. Why come from the viewpoint that humans can't/shouldn't be faithful then enter into marriage? I guess it can be argued marriage doesn't have to be monogamous.... but why not just be single?

    Hope I haven't offended anyone, I'm more asking genuine questions trying to understand rather than judging. It would be great if someone would be brave enough to share why they have an open marriage and how that ties in with their commitment in marriage...
    I agree with this. As I said, everyone is going to have a different view on this. For me, there is NO WAY I would do this, and neither would I tolerate it from my partner. But others are going to be fine with it. It's one of those fundamental things that form a relationship I think. You're either on the same page or you aren't!

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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Why come from the viewpoint that humans can't/shouldn't be faithful then enter into marriage? I guess it can be argued marriage doesn't have to be monogamous.... but why not just be single?
    Just in response to this bit...I think , from my point of view, perhaps because with being married, it's nice to have companionship in more than just a platonic way...no one wants to die alone.

    But sex is still just different, hence why some people enjoy having multiple sex partners.

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  16. #49
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    threechooks is offline If my spelling annoys you that's your problem.... I have better things to do than proofread !
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    Quote Originally Posted by scarymarygoldfish View Post
    there's no jealousy, we're best friends and he's free to do absolutely anything he wants which all keep me feeling very secure that he won't fall in love with anyone else. And if he does, there's nothing I can do about it anyway.
    Exactly right! Even if you are in a monogamous relationship you cannot stop your partner falling in love with someone else if they are that way inclined.

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