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  1. #131
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    I believe in monogamy, I couldn't just have se! with people and play happy families with dh at home like he's my mate, brother, dad or someone I love as family in a platonic way, it seems so wrong and weird.
    If we weren't sexual and it wasn't because something is physially wrong, then I think our relationship will end. I can't imagine loving dh but not wanting to be intimate and same with him. Id be hurt and rejected. Plus I can't just be with guys I'm not emotionally connected to, my body is too personal to share with strangers and aquantances.

  2. #132
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    I have almost finished reading the book AM recommended back in the first few pages of this thread - it's been a great eye opener!!


    ...I came across this today on my newsfeed - it's a "visualisation of Varieties of intiamte relationships'

    Great to look at and realise we ae not all the same, not one of us are more 'right' than the other when it comes to realtionships because there are so personal.

    http://www.informationisbeautiful.ne...-relationship/

  3. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to FiveInTheBed For This Useful Post:

    MilkingMaid  (31-03-2012),MuminMind  (30-03-2012),Witwicky  (30-03-2012)

  4. #133
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    I am in this situation currently. I had a very high libido when I met my hubby. He had very very low. Due to reasons I won't discuss here, he did not enjoy s3x and to be supportive I stopped initiating. That was an incredibly difficult and insecure first year or two. We both had to do soul searching - did we really want to marry each other if s3x may never be on the table? (literally and otherwise lol). He had to question if he really loved me if he didnt want to sleep with me. I had to question if I could cope without it, having previously wanted it frequently. I decided that I loved him more than s3x and that ultimately I would rather marry him and have no s3x than not be with him. Its been 4 years now with NO s3x at all. it's been a very difficult road incluing tears on our honeymoon. We have been TTCandhaving to do DIY artifical insemination. Over time my libido has dropped to practically non existe t-but i still long to be with him that way. I still hope we can work on his issues and move forward and progress in the bedroom department. In the meantime, no, neither of us are ok wth me getting it from elsewhere. It would feellike betrayal to me and i think it would be bandaid treatment and not help us to work on getting hubby ok with s3x. In that sense, it maintains the intimacy of our relationship even though wedonthavethat physical intimacy yet.

  5. #134
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    Haven't read any responses. Open relationships are doomed for failure. Whoever had the low libido should get help for their problems first. If no help is available and the couple can't negotiate a sex compromise then admit it's all over red rover. An open relationship will just make for a nasty situation.

  6. #135
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    I have lived both.. Neither worked


    You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.
    Dr. Seuss
    Still mummy to Agnes Ronald and Beryl.

  7. #136
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    My brother was in an open relationship with his wife until she fell in love with her casual fu(k fling and left him, took the child and 73% of their wealth. A big price to pay. I would never be ok with my man doing another woman because as much as sex can be purely physical there is never any guarantee that it won't develop into something it's not meant to. Sex is powerful and if someone else switches on something powerful within you then your mind will be focused on them rather then the other partner who is at home not for-filling your needs.

    I would not do it.

  8. #137
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    I wouldn't do it.
    I would invest in some battery operated goods or if it was DH I would request he used his own hand!

    To me, sex with someone else would shatter me and turn me into an insane crazy jealous woman who needed to know everything. DH and I didn't have sex for around 6-8 months during/after pregnancy and we finally just started again. We both seemed to cope ok but once we DTD I realised what I missed and the intimacy I have with him I wouldn't want with anyone else.

  9. #138
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    Gees this is a old thread being rehashed. ..

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  10. #139
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    To me being in a relationship is giving myself wholly to that person...my thoughts /dreams/fears and my body ....

    I know that when I have s e x with my DH I can open up to my emotions/ not be shy or embarrassed about my body or what we are doing or what noises we do or don't make...I can be me I can relax know that he knows what I like and want and I know what he likes and wants without talking asking ....we talk dirty we play we pleasure each other knowing that we aren't concerned if it looks bad or am I doing it right ...
    I love s e x my libido is a little higher than my DH ....I love to reach the end result but I love the having it done to me type of thing....but all up I think the reason why I feel the way I do about or during s e x you can't just automatically get from Jo blow down the street...
    Alot of our rolls in the hay are a result of flirting with each other during the day or night ...groaping each other hours before then going into the bed room or shower to finish off what we had started earlier in the day. ...
    To me it's not being touched in a sexually way it's being touched by HIM in a sexually way...
    If I wasn't in the mood but he was ....I would pleasure him ....If he medically couldn't perform we would find other ways ...hands/mouths/battery operated devices. ..
    It's not just a roll in the hay. ...

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app


 

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