My 18 month old DD is in the phase of hitting and (very rarely) biting other kids. She doesn't so much hit, as bop other kids on the top of the head. She's been doing it on and off for probably about 2 months now, and although I have tried different approaches to get her to stop, they just aren't working. A lot of other mum friends and my MHN have said, it's a phase, she's figuring out the world around her and it will eventually stop. Although I'd love to see a bit of improvement in it soon, I feel better knowing that it's something most toddlers do at some stage and will eventually grow out of.
My only problem is, I have had 2 instances lately where my DD has bopped another kid on the head, or like today, 'bit' another child (about 3 years old), and the reaction from the other parent has bordered on really rude. I say 'bit' in adverted commers because after I saw DD do it, I went and tended to the victim, apologised and made a fuss (like my MHN told me to do... 'ignore the perpetrator and fuss over the victim'), there wasn't a mark on her, not even discolouring. I think my DD put her mouth over the girls arm and the child cried before DD had a chance to do anything... not that I am defending DD's actions in anyway!
But I digress...
The thing is, I feel so guilty for DD's behaviour anyway, that some of these other mums have made me feel really upset, like I am a horrible mother for having a child who does this. They have been rude to me and dismissive if I try and apologise. Luckily, there have been some mums and dads who have said 'don't worry, my DD/S did that' or 'I understand' or 'it's a phase'.... but some have just been awful.
How do I react to them? I have tried apologising... the women today even told me what to do with DD 'You should really take her out of there' (the cubby she was in at the time, as punishment). The thing is, her daughter had been intimidating my and my friends DD for about an hour beforehand (not letting them in the cubby house, shoving toys in their faces etc.) and my friend and I had let it go so our DD's could work their way through that social situation themselves. NOT that I am condoning my DD's behaviour in the slightest!! But I just felt it was a bit mean of this mum to suddenly react how she did and she was just so dismissive of me
What do I do in this situation? What more can I do but apologise to both the parent and child, and chastise my child for doing it? I'm not condoning her behaviour at all, but I'm having way more trouble dealing with the other parents at the moment....