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  1. #11
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    Thanks for posting WCM.

    For anyone who still does not get it and prefers a more humorous approach:
    http://benpobjie.blogspot.com/2010/1...guide-for.html

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    Bubbles10  (19-01-2012)

  3. #12
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    I know what spawned this and it bothered me too.

    I must admit though, a few years back I asked something similar - if it was perhaps up to women to protect themselves since obviously rapists aren't about to stop raping.

    There are still things I won't do for fear of being raped... but if I DID do these things and I DID get raped - it's still not my fault for being raped. There are plenty of things people could do in order to avoid things, but then those things don't guarantee you'll be rape-free either. Like never leave your house, cos maybe a rapist will attack you. But then, you could be raped in your home, by a stranger who sneaks in... or a friend... or your partner.

    Given that the only thing that prevents a woman from being raped, ACTUALLY prevents her from being raped no matter what, is for rapists to not rape... there's no point in saying, "Well, then maybe just avoid catching the train late at night..." etc. A woman who catches the train late at night in her underwear, who flirts with every guy on the train, who is drunk or on drugs, who is alone... does not deserve to be raped and is not asking to be raped. The only reason she is raped, is because a rapist rapes her.

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  5. #13
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    Id also like to add another tip on how not to get raped - police, judges, juries- do their job better & never allow a rapist/molester out of jail, no matter how much a doctor thinks his changed!!

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  7. #14
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    One of the most common questions a rape victim (whether the predator is a stranger or more likely someone known to the victim) is "why did you put yourself in that position?" That question is still asked by psychiatrists, police, nurses and even friends/family members today in 2012. Very sad.

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  9. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pinkzy View Post
    One of the most common questions a rape victim (whether the predator is a stranger or more likely someone known to the victim) is "why did you put yourself in that position?" That question is still asked by psychiatrists, police, nurses and even friends/family members today in 2012. Very sad.
    a few months ago a lady was raped near my MIL's house - she was in her 80's, legally blind and only has one leg - I wonder why she put her self in that position too - in her own bed in her own unit - must have been the flannelette nighty she wasnt wearing

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  11. #16
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    It is so true that the only sure-fire way to avoid a rape is for a rapist to just not rape. It makes me really sad that, in many cases, the victim is blamed in some way. Makes my blood boil.

    In saying that, I also recognize that the only person on this earth whom I can control is me. If that means that, in order to minimize the likelihood that I will be harmed, I need to take a risk management approach to my life ... then I am absolutely prepared to do that.

    It certainly isn't *right* that I need to think twice about walking home on my own in the dark, but I think taking preventative measures (like carrying the umbrella, or even just assessing my need to be in that situation in the first place) should be encouraged.

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  13. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shoopuf View Post
    It is so true that the only sure-fire way to avoid a rape is for a rapist to just not rape. It makes me really sad that, in many cases, the victim is blamed in some way. Makes my blood boil.

    In saying that, I also recognize that the only person on this earth whom I can control is me. If that means that, in order to minimize the likelihood that I will be harmed, I need to take a risk management approach to my life ... then I am absolutely prepared to do that.

    It certainly isn't *right* that I need to think twice about walking home on my own in the dark, but I think taking preventative measures (like carrying the umbrella, or even just assessing my need to be in that situation in the first place) should be encouraged.

    The thing is, so many victims know their rapist - so the average person *might* be safer being alone in the park at night rather than being at home

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  15. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shoopuf View Post
    It is so true that the only sure-fire way to avoid a rape is for a rapist to just not rape. It makes me really sad that, in many cases, the victim is blamed in some way. Makes my blood boil.

    In saying that, I also recognize that the only person on this earth whom I can control is me. If that means that, in order to minimize the likelihood that I will be harmed, I need to take a risk management approach to my life ... then I am absolutely prepared to do that.

    It certainly isn't *right* that I need to think twice about walking home on my own in the dark, but I think taking preventative measures (like carrying the umbrella, or even just assessing my need to be in that situation in the first place) should be encouraged.
    I agree.

    Unfortunately I don't believe that I can trust rapists to stop raping, and therefore I try to make decisions to reduce my risk of being in a place, at a time, where i might be more likely to be raped.

    Sadly, I think thats just reality

  16. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by WorkingClassMum View Post
    The thing is, so many victims know their rapist - so the average person *might* be safer being alone in the park at night rather than being at home
    Yeah, that's true too. I guess it is a lot easier to think of a rapist as being a nameless, faceless stranger than somebody you know and possibly trust.

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    Deserama  (21-01-2012)

  18. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by WorkingClassMum View Post
    The thing is, so many victims know their rapist - so the average person *might* be safer being alone in the park at night rather than being at home
    True, I am also careful about being alone with people I know but don't really trust, especially where alcohol is involved, because in my experience it often plays a part.

    You are right, the only way to stop rape, is for rapists to stop doing it. But I know I will take every step I can to make myself that little bit safer.


 

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