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  1. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by LucyB View Post
    When someone asks me what I do and I say "I'm a SAHM" I often tack on "but i used to be ..." I hate that I feel I need to do that.
    Same - I don't even say that I'm a SAHM. I still co-own a business, which is now run without me present in the office. So I say that I'm a business owner, but am 'currently' on maternity leave for the forseeable future.

    And then I feel bad for being so defensive. A few months ago a new employee (who had never worked for the business while I was there) introduced me to his partner at a work function as "DH's wife". (DH is the other business owner). Ouch.

  2. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by LucyB View Post
    When someone asks me what I do and I say "I'm a SAHM" I often tack on "but i used to be ..." I hate that I feel I need to do that.
    I do this to!

    Also I noticed there are a few lonely peeps in Brisbane perhaps it is high time for a gathering of lonely Brisbane BHers!
    Last edited by Seacretsquirrel; 18-01-2012 at 17:52.

  3. #53
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    Me too. All these people around me just got into Uni or are studying. I'm never going to be anyone. I'm just not smart enough. Nurses, midwives, phycologists, lawyers, journalists. I'm going to be a mum. I know that's a good thing but I just want to be someone.

  4. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seacretsquirrel View Post
    I do this to!

    Also I noticed there are a few lonely peeps in Brisbane perhaps it is high time for a gathering of lonely Brisbane BHers!
    Sounds good!!

  5. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenrose View Post
    Me too. All these people around me just got into Uni or are studying. I'm never going to be anyone. I'm just not smart enough. Nurses, midwives, phycologists, lawyers, journalists. I'm going to be a mum. I know that's a good thing but I just want to be someone.
    There are many kinds of 'smart'.

    I used to feel like this too, until one day I realized that the only reason I thought I wanted that was because society told me it would make me more worthwhile. I had to take myself off to uni before I realized it though.

    There is no shame in being 'just' a Mum, or a person without a formal qualification.

    Sorry for hijacking. Your post just really resonated with me and I couldn't *not* respond

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to Shoopuf For This Useful Post:

    jenrose  (18-01-2012)

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    I am a single working mother of two... but I don't find that hard.

    I used to have an amazing joint income with my ex husband and got used to living the high life and now have to watch my pennies.... but I don't find that hard either.

    The only thing I find hard is knowing that my ex husband and my ex best friend are in love and going on holidays and never feeling alone and have someone to share their stories with, go to the movies with and even watch tv with... when I don't - I know it's a silly way to think - but they are the ones that had an affair - and it seems their lives are one big happy fairytale. I just want someone to share a meal with... without telling them to sit back on their chair .... you know??!!

  8. #57
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    dreadlockfairy is offline The best things in life.....aren't things!
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    Awesome thread btw. I love my life, I am very lucky & blessed. I guess what l struggle with is I am not accepted by my community. My looks, the way I dress, my attitude on life & how I choose to live it are all looked down upon. People assume I'm a druggie hippy, potential shoplifter, & I'm a penniless young good for nothin mum. Im none of the above. I love who i am & I can't change who i am. So I spend each day being judged by the other local mums who are completely revolting & fake, and who rate someone's worth by how they dress, what their husbands do for a living & how much money they have. My heart breaks every time im at the park & my daughter goes up to one of the local mums at the park to say hello, & she is completely ignored. Im ignored also but dammit im not a child & i understand there are rude losers out there in the world. My lil girl is so happy & innocent, I don't want that amazing spirit crushed by these narrow minded b!tches.And all i want is to meet some ppl who are down to earth & real. But i know im in the wrong area. And of course i worry how my kids will turn out in this poisonous society.

  9. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by Girl X View Post
    Same - I don't even say that I'm a SAHM. I still co-own a business, which is now run without me present in the office. So I say that I'm a business owner, but am 'currently' on maternity leave for the forseeable future.

    And then I feel bad for being so defensive. A few months ago a new employee (who had never worked for the business while I was there) introduced me to his partner at a work function as "DH's wife". (DH is the other business owner). Ouch.
    Am so pleased I'm not the only one. Apologies for only quoting one post but can't work out how to multi quote on computer let alone phone!

    At the moment I'm saying 'I am project managing out renovation and being a mum' but feel like I'm making excuses when I really don't need to.

  10. #59
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    Re the "what do you do?" question, did you notice people don't ask you anymore when you have kids?

    If people meet my partner and I and know we have a child, I've noticed they rarely ask what I do, but ask him (Which is weird for me as I've been working pt from when my son was a newborn)

  11. #60
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    People still ask me - I think though if DD was a baby still they wouldn't if that makes sense? Now she's three and at pre school they assume i am 'doing something'.

    Sorry, DD came in with a 'very important problem' before i finished the post.

    Friends still ask me 'have you decided what you are going to do this year' but that is largely my own fault because I have been calling it my 'gap year' so as to make it a little more understandable for people. And possibly to justify it to myself
    Last edited by NancyBlackett; 18-01-2012 at 20:30.


 

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