I think he made the decision to miss out on the birth when he walked out on us after being given every opportunity to stay. Him being at the birth would cause far more stress then needed. That one is non negotiable, unless he can do some major *** kissing and makee feel comfortable with it.
And if we were still together we would have been living together, so no, I wouldn't have spent nights there with my children. I spent one night there with my son and it was horrible & swore then I'd never do it again.
Crazyfamily, I'd be glad to have him visit his child as often as he wants as long as there were set times and certain boundaries. I don't want to deprive my child of a relationship with it's father. I can't imagine him pulling his finger out and visiting that often anyway though unfortuantely.
London, I do hope to be able to form a strong friendship with him for the sake our child. My reasons for not wanting him at the birth aren't due to anger. More to do with the fact that I only want someone there who will be nothing but supportive of what I want, and someone who I feel comfortable with seeing me in such a vulnerable state.
Thank you for all your replies so far.