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  1. #1
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    Default Why is my 4 yr old DS lying????

    Recently I am finding that my DS who is 4yo is lying to us all the time....about everything and anything! Its doing my head in!!
    He'll do something in front of me or DH and we'll see what happened then ask him why and he'll blattening lie to us and say 'it wasn't me' or 'I didnt do it'....we saw him throw/hit whatever it was at the time with our own 2 eyes????
    Why is he doing this? He is usually such a beautiful little boy but I CANT stand the lying.
    Is anyone else encountered or going through the same thing?

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    Yep DD1 is 4.5 and does this. I always know when she is lying and I'm lucky in that if I don't catch her in the act, but know she is lying, I just say (in a very stern voice) "don't lie to me. I know when you are lying and if you lie then you will be in more trouble" or something along those lines. I say it 2 or 3 times and she confesses. When she eventually tells the truth, I thank her for being honest and ask why she thought she had to lie about it. Where as if she is lying and I know it but she won't confess, she gets sent to her room until she is ready to tell the truth. When she does something in front of me and then lies about it, I get quite cross and send her to her room. Then when she is ready to come out we talk about it and ask her why did she lie and why did she do what she did.


    Me + He = DD1 (2007), DD2 (2010) & BellyBaby due August 2012
    Angel Baby 1 (July 2008) & Angel Baby 2 (October 2011)

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    My 4yr old does this too. I can tell as he has the guiltiest face and will usually come clean about it.

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    Im pretty sure lying at that age is a developmental stage

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    Lying is a developmental stage. Wait until you've got two liars, both who are very convincing and you get stuck trying to work out a 'she did it, no she did it' scenario. fun times.

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    My kids have done this, I really think it's a stage they go through. They think that they can avoid getting into trouble if they say they didn't do it.

    In our house, you get in more trouble if you lie about it.

    eg. If they do something wrong, they might need to sit on their bed for 5 minutes. If they lie about it, they are sent to their room for the 5 minutes, I then ask them to come out and tell them that the 5 minutes they were in their room was punishment for doing something wrong but they have to go BACK into their room for another 15 minutes because they lied. The message is slowly getting through to them!

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    my DS didn't really do that till he started prep .. sigh ..

    now .. we can WATCH him do something .. tell him off - and his response is "but I DIDN"T" .. uhuh .. right ... cause we didn't just see you do it ..

    I'm trying to talk him through it .. and hoping that the phase ends soon .. its horrid ..

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    Mine are 7.5 & 8.5 and have beeen playing the lying game since about 5 or 6. Its less frequent now initially it was like urs- about everything. Now the only time they seem to lie is when they don't want to get in trouble for something or theyre trying to get away w doing something. It drives me mad too

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    Isn't lying a developmental milestone?

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    Thanks for the replies. Nice to know it seems to be a normal phase of a toddler/kids
    Would love to know why it's a development stage - what can they learn from lying???


 

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