My MIL is really nasty. She has continually accused me of controlling DH, and has pretty much hated me since the beginning, even before I met her. She was disgusted when she found out that we were getting married, and has constantly name-called and put me down. She used to have Facebook statuses all the time about how much she loves my BIL's fiancé, but would never mention me.
She constantly complains to friends and family that she never gets to see the grandchildren (she lives on the other side of the country), but she has never actually made the effort to visit. She comments that she can't afford it or doesn't have the holidays, but she has been overseas two or three times a year, every year, since I have known DH. Any time we have seen them has been because we flew there.
Anyway...when I was pregnant we flew thousands of k's to visit DH's family. I started to bleed and cramp, and went to hospital etc and was told that I was miscarrying, so to go home, lay down and take care of myself. I was so incredibly upset, and I just wanted my sister & Mum, but they were thousands of k's away After I was discharged from the hospital I went back to the in-laws house and rested in the guest room (pretty much just laid in bed crying ). MIL had friends over and accused me of being rude because I didn't come out to socialise. She actually called me a "rude selfish cow" because I stayed in my room to miscarry instead of socialising with everyone. She then said (and this is a direct quote) "you hardly see us, how rude to hide away in the bedroom you selfish girl, miscarriage or not"
A few days later we went out for dinner to meet up with BIL & his fiancé, as we hadn't seem them the whole trip (they hasn't bothered to come around...nasty story in itself ).
I wasn't really up for it because of the threatened miscarriage, but went anyway. BIL and his fiancé were incredibly late, about 1.5hours; I was really hungry by that stage and I had the worst morning sickness, so desperately needed to eat something. I ordered something of the menu at DH's suggestion, and copped abuse from MIL for being rude by not waiting for BIL.
After dinner, MIL wanted to get a family photo 'with everyone'. I went to stand up and she said "No - family only". I felt really embarrassed as it was in front of everyone. I sat back down and DH said "D IS family, she's my wife and she's pregnant with your grandchild"! I didn't care if she wanted one with immediate family only, but she was quite rude about it and didn't want any with me in them. Anyway...she made a big deal about it and stormed out of the restaurant.
I rang my Mum in tears, and she was so upset that I was being treated like that. From her house in North QLD she arranged to change our flights and accommodation in a hotel, and we left the following day.
When DH decided to leave me when I was 35 weeks pregnant with our second baby, her Facebook status was "I will support everything you do G" I mean honestly? A) I would be disgusted if my son did that to his pregnant wife, I certainly wouldn't support it and B) Why didn't she just text him that? Having a message to him as her status was her trying to get at me.
I just stared at the screen crying and my sister made me delete her. Best decision ever.
Last edited by Witwicky; 25-01-2012 at 14:27.
There's a few with my MIL
1) She turned up to my house 2 hours late for Xmas lunch. My bad for waiting till she and my older BIL were there prior to serving lunch - causing my elderly grandmother to become anxious and needing a lie-down. I then got in trouble and abused by my father and step mother for allowing any of that to happen.
2) She turned up a few hours late for our engagement party. Apparently she had to do the dishes, do 2 loads of laundry as well as a whole heap of menial tasks before heading in.
3) With our wedding, DH asked her not to wear either Silver or Black as that was the colours of my bridesmaids dresses. So of course, she rocks up in a black and silver combo... She said to DH that "I thought B*'s dress was grey" ugh, nooooooooo!!!
4) my mum paid for dh's and his groomsmens (as well as me and my bm's) lunch the day before and after the wedding, as well as paying for both breakfast and lunch for my girls and I on the wedding day... MIL made DH pay for his own lunch on the wedding day.
5) We told MIL and older BIL over Skype that we were utd. Her face dropped and all she could say was 'Oh' - she'd actually told my Aunty at the engagement party that she thought I was only with DH to give dd a playmate - little did she know that at that point in time I didn't even want to amuse the idea of ever falling pg again - it took me another 2 years to even think that way, as well as that I was only with him for his money (Pfft, at that point in time, I was the only income earner until after we got married)
MIL does or says something every time I see or talk to her that leaves me fuming. Her best effort though is when she walked in on me when I had just within seconds given birth to DD, I was facing business end to the door and she stood there with her hands on her face, mouth open and stood there looking shocked till my mum went over and pretty much pushed her out of the room.
Few that stick is not bothering to take an hour out of their day to come to DD2 1st birthday! Apparently they have a life! DD1 is clearly favourite as they takr her but DD2 is too much work?!???
When I was pregnant with DD1 and living with in-laws (dh away with airfirce) I got accused of using too much Toilet paper (god she stocks it in a bunker!! Don't think she will need to buy anymore as long as they live!)
where should i start?
mine is currently over at the moment. she has been here for about 6 hours so far and id be lucky if she has said 2 words to me. she makes me feel like an unwanted guest in my own house.
she catches the bus past our house at least once a week to visit my sil but doesnt bother to get off and see my DS. she has only seen him about 10 times since he was born and we have initiated every single visit
Why for six hours? Aaaah go home lady!
Most recent offensive statement...?
Dp was looking for advice on skin to skin after birth as we have been learning about it in birth education classes and how beneficial it is..
All she said to him was "it's a load of bs.. It's just rubbish"
On the other side... I think the most hurtful thing is her constantly putting dp down to his face, and to me. She constantly tells me I should leave him, and even about a week after we told her we were pregnant she pulled me aside and said "are you sure you want this baby with b..?"
I have never told dp this because it would cause more problems...
We pretty much avoid her at all costs but its difficult as dp works for his parents business
She made me feel like there was something wrong with me when I told her I was having trouble with BF and wanted to try formula. It's one of the main reasons I don't get involved in BF vs bottle arguments. She made me feel awful about myself for something I had no control over and tried my best to fix.Just thinking about it now is actually making me cry
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