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  1. #41
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    Can I just say I find this thread interesting as I was starting to feel like a freak coz we spend most of our time together & rarely socialize alone. At least I now know it's pretty common:-)

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  3. #42
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    BabushkaMumma is offline Mothering with my whole heart as thats what my girls have given me.
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    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?

    No, DH may ask for certain foods that he's not had in sometime and may make a suggestion for the menu plan but he doesn't complain if it is a simpler meal. He did say to me that I don't make enough stir fries, I told him that's because my mother does it better - so I outsource



    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.

    He does whatever I need / ask him to do. He puts the dishwasher on each night, and puts it away. He'll clean my kitchen, sweep floors, vacuum when I ask, tidy up etc. Mows the lawn mostly each week but doesn't do laundry as it's mainly done before he'd get a chance now..but he used to all the time. There may be times when it's done with a little sigh, but overall, he knows that it's not just 'my job' to do.



    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?

    We talk about this often - he has a day where he plays soccer for a few hours. I don't have a dedicated period for myself but I have scheduled in some time for myself in the evenings to do things I enjoy like craft, sewing or reading.

    If I had an activity DH would certainly support me and help.

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  5. #43
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    1. No, never! But in saying that DP does most of the cooking anyway. But he is still super appreciative and complimentary when i cook

    2. We don't have a schedule, whoever is home does what needs to be done when it needs to be done. There is no keeping track, ie "i did this so you need to do this"... i feel as though i do slightly more on average, but then i work less hours and rarely cook, and there are weeks when he def does more than i do.

    3. Same as cleaning, whatever is on is on and thats ok. if he has something on he goes out, if i have something on i go out. There is no keeping tally and zero jealousy. We mostly go to bbqs or host bbqs together anyway.

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  7. #44
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    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?
    DP isn't a fussier eater which makes my life easier, he doesn't like fresh tomato, so I just make sure his meals don't have fresh tomato. Apart from that he will eat and always be thankful of what I cook, I admit, I love cooking and get very experimental in the kitchen, I always ask his honest opinion on all the meals I cook and whether he thinks I can alter them to taste better in anyway, usually he will tell me it is perfect how I cooked it.

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there. He helps alot I guess, I mean the house is usually clean as I do the house work when he is at work, but on the weekends or evenings he will occasionally do the dishes, mow lawns, make beds, take out rubbish etc.

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids? He has more "me" time, but we don't have kids together, he will usually go out fishing 3+times a week and also has indoor cricket. But I go to the gym everyday and the kids are in the creche, DP always offers to watch the kids if I want to go out and get my hair done catch up with friends etc. But I guess because most of my friends have kids, I don't mind taking them with me.

    HTH

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  9. #45
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    ...
    Last edited by FloatingFairy; 17-02-2012 at 13:57.

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  11. #46
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    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?

    Dp hasn't once complained. In fact I get sick of hearing how great every meal is because I don't know if she really likes it lol in saying that though, there are a couple of meals I make because I love them and they're not her favourite but she will still compliment me.

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.

    Dp does all the dishes and will take rubbish out and maybe do half the washing.

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?

    Dp and I spend 95% of our time together, before DD we went on a Lot of holidays and seen bands etc.
    I go for coffee with my friends when dp is working. Dp doesn't really socialize but will occasionaly go to her parents house to play drums. We're happier to be home and hang out together. If I feel like being out and about or doing something for myself we'll go shopping etc and Dp can hold DD while I shop.

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  13. #47
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    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?

    I do most of the everyday meals… DH never ever complains about them. He’s pretty easy to cook for though! He will maybe do dinner once a week. He enjoys cooking and will quite often try something new, or make us a ‘fancy’ dinner. If I come home and cant be bothered cooking he’ll have no dramas in making dinner or decide it’s a dinner out somewhere. He’ll request things on occasion, normally when we are buying our groceries for the week and I’ll add it to the weeks menu. I don’t mind that, its often something we haven’t had in agggess and he loves. I don’t cook anything we both don’t like, but then there isn’t much we don’t like anyway!

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.

    DH does help out, probably not as much as he thinks, but he always does a quick clean up when he gets home (gets home about an hour before me). Someday that means dishes, vacuum, straighten up whatever mess DS has made in the morning before leaving for work/daycare other days its just a quick tidy. He does everything outside – garden, cars, verandah, cleaning up after DS out there. Sometimes he just doesn’t see mess or things to do, so I will call and ask him to put the washing out, or one in before I get home from work. On the weekends I do a ‘big’ clean – mop, bathrooms, dust etc but having him do the tidy up when he gets home helps this from becoming a MASSIVE clean.

    If I make dinner, he’ll do the dishes or vice versea.


    Its not very often he'll clean a bathroom or do the ironing... but there the two I like the most, I hate hanging out washing and I can normally oragnise it for it to ready for me he gets home to hang out Not that he knows that!

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?

    DH tends to have much more ‘me’ time with his friends. We have a lot of ‘us’ time though, which is nice. Its really my issue that I don’t have more personal ‘me’ time, I get the guilt’s! Working fulltime means I find it hard sometimes to find a balance between me, we, and he! If we go out 90% of the time its together and DS will go to my parents. We probably go out together at least once a month (a friends bday, dinner or something).

    But a trade off hour for hour, nope. And I wouldnt expect it either.


  14. #48
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    Gothel is offline Skip the drama, stay with Mama!
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    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Nope, he's really easy to feed, he only complains if the grocery bill gets too high. As for dishes that take time to prepare, well that just doesn't happen in our house.

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. He does the dishes when he's home, he does the ironing if i don't get to it, and he baths the kids. I do everything else mostly, but then DH spends most of his free time working on our renovations so I would feel terrible esp as Im a sahm. I don't think I've ever seen him clean a loo (tho i know he did it before we got together

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. [/QUOTE]
    I would say I get more me time than Dh cos he spends a lot of his free time working on the house.

  15. #49
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    1. No
    2. Its split 50/50, he prob does more than i do.
    3. I have more, wednesdays are my days. DH studies & thats about it.

  16. #50
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    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?
    Nope, almost never. The only time I can recall it was I once overcooked steaks and she said it was overcooked. She still ate the steak and complimented every other aspect of the meal though. We usually decide what we're eating together and she cooks about half the time too.

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.
    Never. It's irritating, but mess just doesn't bother her. It bothers me way more, so I always do it. She would do it if it got to the point that bothered her, but that point is way further away from it than me.

    She doesn't expect me to clean though, so I clean only because I want to. When we have kids, I've told her it'll have to change though.

    She does always wash the dishes after dinner though.


    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?
    We don't have kids, but I probably have more 'me' time than she does, but that's because she's lazier than I am and she doesn't organise anything. I work FT, she does shift work so usually has 4-5 days off in a row and heaps more time to plan stuff, but she prefers to stay at home and sleep or watch a movie or whatever.

    We hardly ever go out alone, always with each other. I always organise things with my friends during times she's working because I work long hours so we don't have heaps of time together during the week so the time we have we like to spend together.

    Also, I'm a nanny so often she will come to work with me on her day off and we'll take the baby out to the pool or beach etc together. Makes my long hours a little easier to deal with too.

    We go to the gym together too, in the evenings when I finish work (24/7 gym) and if either of us have a family thing, we both go.
    Last edited by rainbow road; 06-01-2012 at 14:46.


 

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