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  1. #31
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    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesn't fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?
    No dp is pretty happy with what i cook and if he wants something different he knows where the fridge is or where the take away food shops are.

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.
    Not to much to tell you the truth he does the lawns and sometimes drys the dishes though there are still dishes in the drying rack from the other day that he hasn't put away.


    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?
    No not really i don't have any friends to have me time with or many places to go i don't really mind as long as i can watch my TV shows in peace at the end of the day no one gets hurt .

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  3. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Janesmum123 View Post
    I have a few question for you guys. I'm trying to sort out a few past issues with a certain someone and would like to know how things work for other people.

    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?
    1. He never complains about the food I cook, but I can always tell if he doesn't really like it. I have cooked some shockers and bless his heart, he always tries it. Except my chicken and corn soup. It is awesome but he hates corn.

    2. Um he is pretty lazy around the other house. 9 times out of 10, it is the cause of arguments. He doesn't think I should do it all, he just thinks we should just relax instead

    3. If I ask, he is usually accommodating, but he makes me feel a bit guilty. I don't think he does it in a nasty way; I think he just lacks confidence so he hesitates a little.
    He doesn't really go out (outside of work) on his own except to appointments

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  5. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by Janesmum123 View Post
    I have a few question for you guys. I'm trying to sort out a few past issues with a certain someone and would like to know how things work for other people.

    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?
    1. DF and I usually discuss the meals we will cook during the week, and agree or compromise. We both share cooking duties, when he is home, he cooks, when he is at work I cook.
    2. DF does the majority of the housework. Vacuuming, mopping, laundry (inc ironing), dusting, toilets, bathrooms etc. He even washes and vacuums the cars at least once a week.
    3. Mostly I say its even. Neither of us really get out the house as individuals. We are working on it though, and when we do it will be even.

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  7. #34
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    1. He doesn't complain about what I cook mostly I think because it saves him from cooking. Plus he's so hungry by then, he doesn't worry about it too much. Also if the foods a bit meh he never says anything bad, but if he likes it, he'll tell me how wonderful it is multiple times.

    2. He's getting better. Sometimes he has to be prompted though.

    3. All he really wants to do for 'him' is play his games. He told me to go express some milk and he'll watch DD while I go to the movies for some me time. So I probably get more than him.

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  9. #35
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    My DH does 90% of the cooking as I hate doing it and I wouls rather wash the dishes/stack the dishwasher.If I do cook he has never complained.

    On a regular basis I do 80% of the housework and DH does 100% of the work outside and any maintenace. DH will do more housework if I ask but as I only work part time and I find myself cleaning after he does anyway I prefer to do it myself.
    Looking after DS is 50-50 when DH is home.

    I have me time whenever I want it and DH never complains. I have me time more than he does in all honesty. DH encourages me to catch up with friends and has never resented it but he does like us to spend quality time together also (which will happen more when we move back to the city and have access to baby sitters).

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  11. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Janesmum123 View Post
    I have a few question for you guys. I'm trying to sort out a few past issues with a certain someone and would like to know how things work for other people.

    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?
    1. Doesn't complain, doesn't request anything, DH would just make it himself if he wanted.
    2. DH goes on helping sprees with cleaning, but not to much regular help.
    3. Nope don't really get any 'me' time.

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

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    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?

    Never complains & has eaten food cold & not told me!!!!! I'm not a great cook ( I'm learning ) & he's a hungry man, so he'll eat anything. We do have a set list of meals for meal planning that we choose from each week. If its a time consuming meal it's on weekend only.

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.

    Always does outside stuff, including washing car. Rarely cooks or does dishes or mops/vacuums BUT regularly does washing, cleans bathrooms. Never makes bed, lol

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?

    My DF doesn't go out much so I do feel guilty when I go out, even if it's just shopping or getting my hair done! He has no problems with being at home looking after the kids.

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  15. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Janesmum123 View Post
    I have a few question for you guys. I'm trying to sort out a few past issues with a certain someone and would like to know how things work for other people.

    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.

    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?
    I haven't read replies but here is mine -

    1. DH loves any dish I cook. He has never ever complained about it, and he barely ever requests any particular dish when I am doing the meal plan. I do put a LOT of effort into the meals I make though, andi think he knows that.

    He doesn't complain about the work lunches I pack for him either, but instead I get a text each day at around 1.30pm saying thank you and that it was yummy

    2. DH cleans the kitchen (including dishes) every night and sometimes makes the bed in the morning. On weekends occasionally he will vacuum. He doesn't do nearly as much cleaning as I do, but that is mostly because I find cleaning therapeutic and have a certain way I like it done. Also, I'm a LOT more efficient than he is at it

    3. 'Me' time ... Well, neither of us really do the 'me' time thing. We tend to spend all of our time together either alone or with mutual friends. Very occasionally I will go out shopping alone with my little sister, and once or twice DH has gone to a mates place for a poker night, but those are rare occasions. When we do go out alone it is a complete non-issue.

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    Janesmum123  (06-01-2012)

  17. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Janesmum123 View Post
    1. Does your OH complain about the food you cook? Maybe not so much complain but doesnt fancy what you cook? And asks you to make certain dishes? In particular ones that take a long time to make?
    He doesn't complain about what I cook - usually complements my cooking. But there are certain foods he doesn't like to eat and that is part of getting used to being a couple that each of you prefer/don't prefer certain foods. I only cook garlic prawns (which I really like) when he's not home for dinner. He also doesn't like pork, turkey or lamb so we don't eat them either. Not a big deal though after over 10 years of marriage I'm pretty used to it . He's used to not eating spicy foods or dishes with olives to suit my tastes .

    2. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning. Excluding kids just cleaning/ washing dishes/ laundry that type of thing. I am meaning on a regular basis not just here and there.
    mmm ... I'm dreadful at cleaning, and at our house it is my dh who does the majority of cleaning (and lots of cooking for that matter). He does 90% of the washing of the dishes/cleaning the kitchen and does a lot of the other cleaning too. I do most of the laundry though, but he helps with that too. He's a great dh
    3. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH. For example your OH goes out once a week with mates does that mean you can do the same without any confrontation from OH and OH staying home looking after kids?
    What happens, happens on this front. Neither of us really go out with friends much at all and I can't remember when either of us last went to the movies. But if one of us wants some time to do something alone (eg. stuff on the computer, exercise, shopping, etc) then we accomodate each other. For example in the evenings after our ds goes to bed and we have our new baby dd to look after we take turns, allowing each other time for showering, checking e-mails, etc so that one of us isn't left 'holding the baby' for hours on end.

    Getting used to a relationship and it's limitations/new situations/issues can be difficult, especially if kids are added to the mix. It does require a lot of good communication, patience and time to adjust. With time & effort though a good partnership that works for both of you can result, where issues like the ones you've raised aren't something you really think about, the stuff just happens.

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  19. #40
    AndrewTheEmu is offline Bubhub Ambassador - tongue in cheek
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    Q. Does your OH complain about the food you cook?
    A. Never. The only way I can tell he doesn't like it is the way he says 'it's great honey' in a not so entusiastic voice. He does ask me to prepare carb free meals often which I don't like doing (as I only make one dinner that we all, including DD, eat) I usually compromise by making very low carb meals and yes they can be time consuming. But it's not like he asks me to make pasta and pastry from scratch etc.

    Q. How much does your OH "really help" with cleaning.
    A. He washes dinner dishes maybe 3 times a week (but doesn't dry or put them away). He brings in the washing maybe 2 out of 8 loads but again he's never put it on or hung it out or folded it or put it away. He foes the lawns every fortnight though. And he rarely helps with DD at all unless I ask.

    Q. Do you have "me" time the same amount as your OH.
    A. No, i have more. Dd goes to preschool one day a week and i have the whole day to do as i please. DH rarely goes out with his mates (dont blame me, im always telling him he needs to let his hair down, hes just a bit of a hermit) if i want to go out i have to ask 'if its okay'/'can he mind DD', its not like i can just say 'im going out, bye'

    You didn't ask but I'll let you know anyway that we both work too, I do one day a week less then DH and he still expects me to do 95% of the 'house/child rearing'

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