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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by London View Post
    Messy? No.
    Filthy? Yes.

    Growing up, my best friends house was always in the same state. 6 seater dinner table and all kitchen benches COVERED in dishes. The parents refused to wash and left it for the kids to do it (3 kids, youngest 2 in high school, eldest working but living at home..so all old enough to do chores). The kids rarely bothered so the dishes just piled up. It disgusted me and I just couldnt understand how they could leave filthy dishes like that alllllll the time.
    They had a pool table that was ALWAYS covered in clean washing. The mum got sick of sorting it out and would just dump the clean washing on the table and the 3 kids would go and grab what they needed as they needed it. That was messy, not filthy. I didnt like it (my mum always kept a neat, clean house) because I just wasnt used to it.

    Saying all that, each to their own and whatever people are comfortable with is fine. Mess is ok with me, I can understand a bit of mess.....but filth like days and days old dirty dishes and rubbish bin that seems to be always overflowing, yes I judge.
    I once went to a friend's place that was like that - she shared a great flat in inner Sydney with her brother, but they had literally not one clean glass - drinking, wine, shot - because there were weeks and weeks worth of dirty dishes. There was no more space on the kitchen benches so they'd started piling up on the dining table. I was horrified, and being 20 at the time, I said so! She never invited me to that house again, and I wouldn't have been able to accept if she did. She's much better now though.

    I try not to judge, but it's really hard when something goes against the grain for you. Even in my own house, I sometimes judge - DP is my direct opposite and it's very hard for him to keep things at the level I like them to be clean, neat & tidy-wise. As a result I do the lions share of the cleaning because it's something that he would not be bothered by if it went undone, but I am - but if he comes through and does his tornado act, leaving debris of all kinds in his wake, then I definitely judge!

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by LucyB View Post
    Did you just come to my house?!
    Was that for me??

    Wasnt you, this place was horrid.

    Il put it this way, to clean that persons house the cost would have amounted to 3x the amount of a bond clean!!

    Like it was gross, i opened the door and had to kick stuff out of the way , came out of the entrance (it was like a wall that you cant see through to the house)

    Got into loungeroom, turned around and left.

    Horrid!!!!!

  3. #23
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    Yep. I definitely judge. Messy is one thing. Dirty is another.

  4. #24
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    I couldn't care less how messy someone elses's house is ... especially my friends. I have a friend who felt she had to clean before I visited or wouldn't invite me in if I had dropped by with short notice . I honestly take no notice, I'm there to visit my friends, not critque their home.

    The only time I take notice is in my work, if I notice someone isn't keeping ontop of stuff then I need to look at why? Do they need assistance and are too proud to ask, physically not coping etc. Still I don't judge, just look at what help I can get them.


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  5. #25
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    my SIL is a clean freak and she was always very judgmental of my housework skills until she had to go back to work herself, and realised how hard it is when you're a working mum trying to keep the house clean/tidy!

    i don't judge people with messy houses, in fact i'm always relieved to see that it's not just me that struggles with it!

    however i did have a bit of a judgey moment when i stayed with a friend recently and i asked her for a towel so i could have a shower, she directed me to her linen cupboard and all her towels were stained and mouldy smelling! i was a bad judgemental friend

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    Messy okay
    Filthy I would not maintain the friendship
    Harsh much?

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    I used to judge before I had DS! Filthy yes, messy no, the only thing that annoys me is when we do inspections /photos on some properties ( for rent and for sale) some owners/tenants don't seem to care , you would think if an agent/prospective buyer was coming to inspect your home you would make effort to at least tidy up but some of them we have had over the years were shockers! It's hard to tell someone their house is too messy!

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    My house is pretty messy sometimes. Like heaps of laundry to wash and more to fold and put away. Bedroom floor has kids toys and more laundry lol. Paper work all over kitchen table. Lounge full of books and baby toys. Right now there are heaps of blankets on the couch and a baby sling, my school books on the coffee table, a fishing rod against the wall and some shoes in the middle of the floor lol.. But the house is definitely clean. I vacuum a few times a week and mop. Wipe away dust. We never leave dirty dishes on the bench more than a few hours before they are washed. Benches are clean. Bins get emptied. Sinks and toilet get wiped over etc.. And I do judge filth if someone is raising a family in it. Because in my opinion it can be dangerous to kids. There can be mould to breathe in and bacteria grows. I have been to peoples houses which just have that dirty mouldy smell in the air. Its grosse. People who let dirty nappies pile up for days etc.. Yep I think they are irresponsible

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  9. #29
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    I would judge filth, but I've honestly never come across it. I nannied for a family who were very very messy and not terribly clean, which I didn't judge but made me a bit anxious being in their house all day. They hired a cleaner in the end because they were sick of telling me to stop cleaning
    On the other hand, I judge people with display looking houses, not a speck of dust or a cushion out of place, and no personal touches anywhere, i know a few houses like that and they are all owned by boring, bland people

  10. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Witwicky View Post
    Honestly? I don't judge at all - I used to be the same. I have discovered that keeping an organised, tidy house keeps me calm and focused. I become anxious and stressed if my house is a shambles. It reflects upon my kids, my mind, my whole life.

    I really dislike the statement that people who are organised and 'clean' don't spend quality time with their children. In fact, it really irritates me.

    Speaking from my personal experience, I spend *more* quality time with my children when I keep an organised house - because my head is in the right place, I have more time (yes, once you get into the habit of it all you save time due to efficiency, even if it seems like it takes a lot of time) and I'm happier all around.

    Some times my house is crazy - there are days when I cbf doing anything - I might get caught up painting with DS, or I might decide to go shopping instead of cleaning. Or just lay on the couch all day. I don't let it bother me. I try not to sweat the small stuff, and just do what works for me, as everyone should
    Quote Originally Posted by Witwicky View Post
    I should add, this doesn't mean I don't go into places and mentally organise things...because I do It's a guilty pleasure (lame person over here!!!). BUT if it's untidy/messy, I don't walk in think "Farrk, what a pig"!
    Quote Originally Posted by Witwicky View Post
    Ahh yes and I second (or third?) the filthy comment. It's not ok to live unhygienically, where health can be affected. I would definitely refuse a cup of tea at houses like that
    This, this and this.



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