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  1. #11
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    It's baby number 2, Thermolicious, and unfortunately 'free-boobing' isn't an option at present; and no, I don't co-sleep. This one sleeps much better in his own bed... he is actually on the verge of crawling, so maybe you're right. I did try to feed him as he was on the verge of falling asleep... but no luck. Arched his back and pulled away. I have had a look and feel for teeth, but can't find anything.

    Jonnysmama, he doesn't get up during the night, so he wakes up hungry, but still no luck for the morning feed.

    I did call ABA, and unfortunately they couldn't offer too many more suggestions... maybe not unfortunately as at least I'm doing just about all I can. She did suggest that maybe it's because big brother is drinking from a cup so baby is wanting to do that too... hmm maybe, but I'm not too sure about that theory. The lady was lovely, but actually thought it was a little bit humorous... that may just be my interpretation tho' as admittedly I'm feeling a little down about it all.

    Feeling a bit "if only"... "If only I'd known our last breastfeed may be our last, I would have lingered longer, stroking his fuzzy head and savouring the moment". Hoping we sort it out though! Am thinking I might take him to the doctor tomorrow just in case he has something going on with his ears or something...I would be most upset if I found out later he had an ear infection or something.

    Does anyone know about giving babies under 12 months lactose free milk. I tried mixing a little with breast milk and he seemed to like it. I'm really not keen to try formula, but I'm concerned that I can't express enough milk. How long before your milk supply dwindles. I have expressed 3 times today, and only got about 180ml... thinking this isn't enough, but wondering if I can top up with lactose free milk. He also drinks water which is good. How long do I keep trying for?

    Thankyou so much for all of your suggestions everyone. I will try a bath tomorrow if we have no luck in the morning xxx
    Last edited by BeanieBaby; 21-12-2011 at 18:59.

  2. #12
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    I was going to suggest a nice warm bath for the two of you.

    If you keep offering, bub will come back to the breast.

    take care

  3. #13
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    Breast refusal can be really disheartening and distressing. Sometimes we can find a reason, an other times it passes and we never really know why. What we do know though is in almost all cases of breast refusal, the baby will come
    Back with some patience and persistence. It is quite rare for a baby of this age to wean.

    If you feel he needs more milk, the only milk that is safe and recommended to give a baby under 12 months is breastmilk or formula. Breastmilk has lactose in it, so there would be no benefit or reason to give him lactose free milk. Your chn will be able to suggest a suitable formula if you feel he is not getting enough breastmilk.

    One common reason for breast refusal at this age is distractability, teething and having too much solids in the diet. Solids displaces room in the tummy for breastmilk, and since BM is the most important part of the diet until 12 months it's important to offer breast before solids, and at this age solids should just be tastes, not whole meals. Some mothers find feeding in a quiet dark room away from distractions helps with distractability if that is an issue, and/ or feeding immediately before or after a sleep. Rubbing a cooled facewasher on his gums, or rubbing with your finger before a feed can help if it's teething.

    At this point I would suggest a gp check to rule out a medical cause. The most common is sore ears.

    Sometimes if a baby has a negative memory of a feed (for example, it taste funny because of your period), he will create an association and not want to go back even once that issue has passed. it's important in this case for you to stay as calm and patient as possible; maybe let him have some skin to skin time on your chest here there is no pressure to feed. Skin to skin also boosts your milk supply so can do no harm.

    Keep expressing your milk if he completely refuses a feed - breastfeeding works on supply and demand, so it wont 'run out', and if your supply does drop a bit it is always possible to recover it.

    If you call the aba back you will get a different counsellor who may have more ideas than the first one you spoke to

    You are doing really well, Breast refusal is tough and it is hard not to take it personally. Try to keep in mind it does usually pass :

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  5. #14
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    Lovely post Purplecat

    How are you going BeanieBaby?

  6. #15
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    Mumtoeli, I have just finished expressing at my in-laws house on Christmas Eve, which should give an indication on how we're going

    Thanks for your response purplecat. The reason I was asking about lactose free milk in particular, is that is what we drink at home. I was very reluctant to give my boy formula as he is prone to constipation & I believe that formula can cause difficulties.

    My baby boy is still totally refusing to breastfeed, but will drink expressed milk out of a cup. It got to the stage where he didn't even want to lie in my arms for a cuddle, which made me so very sad, so I have stopped offering for now. I have cried and cried, and become so sad and frustrated, which is not very healthy for anyone. I actually feel it is more damaging to our relationship (not to mention my big boy) to focus so much on getting him back on the breast, so consequently I have decided to east up a bit, and what will be, will be. A very sad, stressed out mummy isn't much good to anyone. I was devastated when my big boy weaned at 11 months, so imagine how upset I am at 7 1/2 months. Believe me, I know breast milk is the very best option, so I will continue to offer him when we are both calm and relaxed for a few more weeks. I am going to try to express enough milk for a morning and before bed feed, and 'top-up' with formula if needs be during the day... am actually getting much better at expressing!! Through no particular engouragement, my bubby is gung-ho on eating, and is eating a variety (and quite a bit of food). I guess they are all little individuals, and I feel that I just need to follow his lead.

    I did end up taking him to the doctor, and he is fine and healthy. She made me feel a lot better about it all... told me I was doing an amazing job (), and suggested that it may be a phase, or he may (much to my dismay) be weaning... "They will wean when they are ready". She basically told me that he was a very healthy boy, and just work with him... offer the breast for as long as I have the patience for it, and express until I no longer feel I can do it. She fealt that he is certainly getting enough nutrition from the food he is eating, so not to worry too much about the breastfeeding, and that I could probably not worry about formula at all, since he is drinking water as well.

    Anyway, thankyou everyone for your words of encouragement and advice. I will keep trying, but not get too anxious about it all. I will also keep checking back for any other advice anyone may have. What a lovely bunch of ladies you all are to lend some help to a desperate mummy xxx

    Merry Christmas
    Last edited by BeanieBaby; 24-12-2011 at 18:10.

  7. #16
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    I am going to bed one happy mummy tonight. My baby boy has been a bit unwell the last couple of days, & was a bit unsettled tonight. I offered him a breast, & after some initial reluctance he fed! Even had both sides We'll see what tomorrow brings, but I am so very happy! One whole week... I will be happy knowing that he will have a breastfeed when he feels like it... fingers crossed! I shall treat every one like it is the last. Hip hip hooray!

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  9. #17
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    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
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  10. #18
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    Awww I'm so happy for you! Wow, it sounds like you have been through a lot, I can only imagine how difficult it would be having a 7.5 month old refusing to feed. You sound like an amazingly devoted & loving Mummy I really hope this keeps up & good luck!!!


    Sent from my iPhone, using Tapatalk

  11. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by BeanieBaby View Post
    I am going to bed one happy mummy tonight. My baby boy has been a bit unwell the last couple of days, & was a bit unsettled tonight. I offered him a breast, & after some initial reluctance he fed! Even had both sides We'll see what tomorrow brings, but I am so very happy! One whole week... I will be happy knowing that he will have a breastfeed when he feels like it... fingers crossed! I shall treat every one like it is the last. Hip hip hooray!

    Yay, so happy for you! You'll appreciate your cuddly feeds much more now And so will I after reading what you've been through (DS is 7.5months too!).

    I'm glad you're feeling better, that makes me happy too!

    Merry Christmas

  12. #20
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    Well, it's not the perfect end to the year that I had hoped for (ie back to breastfeeding). My now almost 8 month old DS had another breastfeed the following morning and has refused all since I'm thinking I will stop offering now as he gets so very upset... and of course, then I do too. At least I was very mindful & just sat and enjoyed those two feeds. He continues to drink some breastmilk out of a cup, so I'll keep expressing as much as I can I guess... am a bit concerned that my supply is dwindling tho'.

    I am a bit worried that he's not getting enough fluids in our hot Queensland summer.... I'm only managing to express about 150-200 ml/day, he refuses formula, but is happily drinking water. I'm only managing to express 2-3 times a day... I know this probably isn't enough, but I don't seem to have the time to try more often. Everything I read and hear says that the majority of bubby's nutrition until they are 1 should be coming from breastmilk... I know, I know, and am feeling terribly guilty (even tho' I know it's not my fault). Maybe I should have held off on solids or introduced them a bit more slowly... was trying to follow his lead, but not sure I've done the right thing in the long run. Is he going to get everything he needs from food and water? Such a worry... and I don't have the comfort of knowing that if he doesn't eat much, booby milk will give him all he needs.

    We also have a few constipation problems... probably not surprising, going from a fully breastfed baby, to total refusal in 1 1/2 months. I've tried pawpaw, pear, prune juice (which he dislikes) and limiting cheese and banana. Have now resorted to a parafin based mixture on the recommendation of the doctor, but it seems as soon as I stop, he has trouble again, and I don't want to rely on a 'laxative' too long.... any suggestions. And yes, I'm trying to get as much fluid into him as possible. He cries when he poos and they are so big! Is this just his little digestive system getting used to the food?

    Anyway... thanks for lending me your ears. Savour all those lovely times while breastfeeding your gorgeous babies... harrumph!

    Happy New Year


 

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