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  1. #1
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    Default Desperate for Advice

    I am almost to breaking point... I dont know what to do.

    My DD will be 2 in January. She is wonderful, happy, bubbly and full of energy... until bed time.

    Up until now, her routine has not changed, dinner, bath, bottle + story, bed. I have never had a problem. Now it is dinner, bath, bottle + story, bed, up, bed, up, bed, up, lay down with her, up, bed, up, lay down with her, up, Me having a mental breakdown, her sleep (9ish).

    I CANT HANDLE IT ANYMORE!!!

    Working full time and trying to do this, plus everything else is killing me. I just dont have enough hours in the day to get everything done. Not even the basics.

    I have another problem. She bites herself when she gets frustrated.

    This sleep thing has been going on for two months. I am loosing kilo's, tired and grumpy all the time. DH helps and is great but its the same result. We have no family where we live and i dont think it is fair to ask a friend to help while she is doing this.

    Out of desperation (and i hate myself for this) i took the advice that everyone was giving me. Keep the routine the same, make sure her room is safe and secure. Put her to bed and let her cry it out. Close the door. Hmm, i lasted 15 minutes and that nearly killed me. You should have seen her arms when i went into her room. OMG from the wrist to the shoulder covered in bite marks.

    The doctors say it is a phase ( some kids hold thier breath, others bite etc) and she will stop on her own...

    I dont think i can handle much more.......

  2. #2
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    I did wat the super nanny does when my son did this and it lasted like 2 days.. Just keep bringing her back ignoring her put her into bed and walk away.

    Sent from my GT-I9000 using BubHub

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    bpac  (20-12-2011)

  4. #3
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    Also ignoring the biting.. She wont hurt herself.. If she bites walk away.. I know its hard but it gets your attention thats why she does it.. My son used to bang his head and I would get so upset.. Once I walked out of the room when he did it he soon gave up.

    Sent from my GT-I9000 using BubHub

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    bpac  (20-12-2011),FloatingFairy  (20-12-2011)

  6. #4
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    Why are you cutting out the bottle? Could you replace it with a cup of milk instead?
    My DD feeds to sleep & that's how i plan to phase it out eventually but i'm not in a hurry. My DD will sleep almost anywhere(with struggles) but the bottle is the constant.
    Has she ever cried her self to sleep before this 2 months?

    Good luck

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    bpac  (20-12-2011)

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    Hi there...

    Our DD1 is nearly 2 and he had started waking 3-4 times a night and re-settling quickly but as soon as we left her room, she'd be awake again; obviously with a new baby we could not keep doing this, so we implemented the below and her sleeping is so much better, she even slept through 11 hours last night, but usually she will wake 1-2 times and as soon as we go in, she dives straight back into the mattress literally asleep, we give her a quick pat and go back to bed for a few ours. This is what we've implemented:

    The Kissing Game (can be substituted for patting):

    · Have a consistent bedtime
    · Develop positive bedtime routine
    · Put Ariella down when she is drowsy (1-2mins after bottle)
    · Promise to return in a minute to give a pat
    · Return almost immediately to give a pat
    · Take a few steps towards the door and return to give another pat
    · Promise to return in a minute to give another pat
    · Put something away, or do something in the room
    · Return to give another pat
    · Promise to return in a minute to give another pat
    · Pop outside the room for a few seconds
    · Return to give another pat
    · As long as Ariela is lying down, she gets more pats, but no more chat, cuddles, stories, drinks, just pat until asleep
    · When Ariella is sound asleep you can stop

    This approach takes a lot of energy and time, and may take 3 hours for your child to settle, you may have to give 300 pats in one night.


    Good luck!

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    AllYouNeedIsLove  (20-12-2011),bpac  (20-12-2011)

  10. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dobbie View Post
    Why are you cutting out the bottle? Could you replace it with a cup of milk instead?
    My DD feeds to sleep & that's how i plan to phase it out eventually but i'm not in a hurry. My DD will sleep almost anywhere(with struggles) but the bottle is the constant.
    Has she ever cried her self to sleep before this 2 months?

    Good luck
    She has a bottle during story time, has a sippy cup during the day but refuses the sippy cup at night. She is usually still going on the bottle after story time. I leave it with her. Last night, i had to refill it for her 4 times!!

    She cried herself to sleep once when she was still in a cot - but she wasnt biting herself at the time.

    A few weeks ago we put together a backpack which had her nitie, sleeping bag (thought it might be fun) her seahorse that lights up, her bottle and a book. Tried the whole its bed time, went to the fridge, fill the bottle, carry the bag to bed etc.... now she sees the bag and runs in the other direction!!
    Last edited by bpac; 20-12-2011 at 12:44. Reason: Spelling

  11. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by babylove81 View Post
    Hi there...

    Our DD1 is nearly 2 and he had started waking 3-4 times a night and re-settling quickly but as soon as we left her room, she'd be awake again; obviously with a new baby we could not keep doing this, so we implemented the below and her sleeping is so much better, she even slept through 11 hours last night, but usually she will wake 1-2 times and as soon as we go in, she dives straight back into the mattress literally asleep, we give her a quick pat and go back to bed for a few ours. This is what we've implemented:

    The Kissing Game (can be substituted for patting):

    · Have a consistent bedtime
    · Develop positive bedtime routine
    · Put Ariella down when she is drowsy (1-2mins after bottle)
    · Promise to return in a minute to give a pat
    · Return almost immediately to give a pat
    · Take a few steps towards the door and return to give another pat
    · Promise to return in a minute to give another pat
    · Put something away, or do something in the room
    · Return to give another pat
    · Promise to return in a minute to give another pat
    · Pop outside the room for a few seconds
    · Return to give another pat
    · As long as Ariela is lying down, she gets more pats, but no more chat, cuddles, stories, drinks, just pat until asleep
    · When Ariella is sound asleep you can stop

    This approach takes a lot of energy and time, and may take 3 hours for your child to settle, you may have to give 300 pats in one night.


    Good luck!
    Have sort of done this but might try it again. Everytime she comes out, i dont say a word, walk her back to her bed, give her a kiss and walk out. She starts screaming and will be out of bed again. Grrrr. Are you sure there isnt an off switch???

  12. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by bpac View Post
    She has a bottle during story time, has a sippy cup during the day but refuses the sippy cup at night. She is usually still going on the bottle after story time. I leave it with her. Last night, i had to refill it for her 4 times!!

    She cried herself to sleep once when she was still in a cot - but she wasnt biting herself at the time.

    A few weeks ago we put together a backpack which had her nitie, sleeping bag (thought it might be fun) her seahorse that lights up, her bottle and a book. Tried the whole its bed time, went to the fridge, fill the bottle, carry the bag to bed etc.... now she sees the bag and runs in the other direction!!
    Sorry thought the bottle was what had changed Miss read your original post.
    If you find the off switch pleeeeeeeease let us all know what a blessing that would be

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  14. #9
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    Ohhhh an off switch ****dreamssssss****

    Yes anyway, be careful with the biting. If she starts to hurt herself and you cant stop her, a visit to a pead might be in order. Some kids will intentionally hurt themselves and its not for attention. Its just a habit that they cant stop.

    Let's hope its just a terrible 2's stage. DS decided yesterday that naps are no longer necessary after he turned 2 on Sunday He was jumping, rolling, summersaulting on his bed for 1 hour before I gave up and got him out of bed.

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    bpac  (20-12-2011)

  16. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Misschief View Post
    Ohhhh an off switch ****dreamssssss****

    Yes anyway, be careful with the biting. If she starts to hurt herself and you cant stop her, a visit to a pead might be in order. Some kids will intentionally hurt themselves and its not for attention. Its just a habit that they cant stop.

    Let's hope its just a terrible 2's stage. DS decided yesterday that naps are no longer necessary after he turned 2 on Sunday He was jumping, rolling, summersaulting on his bed for 1 hour before I gave up and got him out of bed.
    That is what I was scared of, I went to three different doctors and they all thought it was a phase so fingers crossed


 

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